"The Dreaded Phone Call"

[jwright25]

Originally Posted by AlphaGamUGAAlum

It stinks that they acted that way. Honestly, the organization should make it clear that that junk won't be tolerated. You're performing a service for the organization, and they need to act right.

Every summer there is a wonderful article in our magazine that outlines the legacy policy. While I don't recall whether or not it states that there won't be phone calls, I did do some further research and determined that it is a general policy that we are NOT to call. The reasoning behind it is that it is the PNM's decision whether or not to share her experience.

Originally Posted by AlphaGamUGAAlum

On a different note, I wonder if you have any kids?

I don't. And I had a feeling that it would come up. Not specifically from you. Just in general. Because I considered that myself. I had to think about how one day I might have a daughter in this situation. While I absolutely cannot predict how I will feel when I do have kids, I do think about it a lot and what kind of parent I would be. I know that without a doubt I would be available to my daughter to talk if she was released, but I just don't think that I am entitled to know about it before she does.

Originally Posted by AlphaGamUGAAlum

I'm not suggesting that not having kids invalidates someone's opinions about legacies, but I usually see a different attitude in people who face the realistic possibility of it happening to their kids, who as far as they know, seem well qualified.

But if I am not allowed to know why she was released, why would it matter how well qualified she is or isn't? Being told she is released is different from being told why. I think we've all agreed that the alumna on the receiving end of a call should simply say "Thank You" and end the conversation. We'll still love our daughters and think that they are well qualified. Just not a match for that particular chapter of our sorority.

Originally Posted by AlphaGamUGAAlum

I don't think that chapters should ever take a risk on a legacy when they have far better candidates. By risk, I mean bad grades, questionable reputation, whatever.

But when the legacies are as "good" as the other PNMs you put on your bid list, by whatever standard you are using, I think it's fine that they get priority.

There were no obvious risks with the two legacies that I mentioned above as having been cancelled after one semester. They had good enough grades to make the grade cut, good standards, etc. They weren't very involved in high school, and we knew that there was some outside pressure from the alumnae to get them to go through. There were women with higher GPAs, many more activities, and - frankly - better personalities who did not get a bid. Those women most likely would still be involved.

I don't think we should change our policy because of this, and we are treading away from the "to call or not to call" discussion and more into a general discussion of legacy policy. But that's my fault for bringing it up.