Loved Ones Agianst Sororities :(

[RareTreasure]

That sounds sooo good. I know i cant live my life based on what a man wants me to do...its just soo hard to gather the balls to say "What the heck....either your going to be here or your not." But im not that mean of a person....but i need to do what i want to do. I dont know. I somethimes think if I do do it, and he does leave me, if I actually do make it....he will dogg me out. But thats childish. He's grown, so i hope he wouldnt stoop to that level.

[WhiteDaisy128]

My (now) darling husband, Chris, said to me at one point in our relationship, "I do not date sorority girls." At the time, we had been dating for 2 years. I was devastated. However, my mom was going through a battle with cancer and it meant so much to me to become her "sister" when DG was colonizing at my school.

I finally told Chris that if our relationship is going to last then he does not have to support everything I do, but he must believe in my ability to make sound decisions and he must support ME. I went through the recruitment process, got a bid, and became a "sorority girl." He then saw how supportive my sister were for me (with my mom's cancer battle). He also saw that I suddenly did not become a different person. I (still) didn't drink, smoke, party, etc.

He still does not LOVE the idea of me being in a sorority, but he loves me. And I secretly think he didn't mind so much many of the events he came to in order to support me. He ended up marrying me. We are now expecting our first child. We find out the gender Oct. 6th...but both think it's a girl. He's already said he does not want to "encourage" sorority life...but he knows that I will not abandon DG as an alumna (I'm still very involved at an international level). We'll see in 18 years where life brings us!

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by RareTreasure

I dont know. I somethimes think if I do do it, and he does leave me, if I actually do make it....he will dogg me out. But thats childish. He's grown, so i hope he wouldnt stoop to that level.

He's totally childish. He wants you all to himself, which is at best just possessive, and at worst completely abusive. If you've been together for 5 years without a symbol of a larger commitment on his part, then you have your answer as to where he sees the two of you. Do you honestly, honestly, believe that he's the One?

I started dating my ex-boyfriend during my pledge process. He was (and is still) pretty anti-Greek. If you listen to him, the social ills of the world were all brought forth by fraternity and sorority members. But, since he loved me, and supported me in whatever I did, he expressed his concerns about elitism, substance abuse, etc., and didn't threaten to break up with me for something as trivial as joining a sorority. We ended up breaking up years later, for reasons completely unrelated to Greek Life.

ETA: I just read your most recent post. He sounds terribly needy.

[RareTreasure]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

He's totally childish. I just read your most recent post. He sounds terribly needy.

He is, but you cant tell him that. He's extremely defensive. He will argue you down...and when you have him cornered in to the point that there is nothing else that he can say......he will end it with "My mind is not gonna change, so its up to you."