Quote:
Originally Posted by jubilance1922
Hmmm...I'm really surprised by some of the comments in this thread, especially the ones about family. I guess if that's working for some folks, then keep doing what you're doing. But it seems extremely judgemental to me to deem a person unacceptable because of the actions of their family. I know someone who didn't come from the greatest home life, she had a crack addicted mother, a brother in a gang, and a sister who was a teenage mother. Yet this woman did not fall victim to any of that, in fact, she finished school, got married, and raised 4 beautiful, well adjusted, law-abiding kids. And she did it all without having to cut off her relationships with her family...and her family wound up getting it together because she was such a good influence.
But then again, you don't get to choose your family, and you certain cant change the behavior of another adult.
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Dionysus and Munchkin03 mentioned the family drama and control issues that can impact/destroy the relationship. I co-sign those and add that my
main issue is with the potential problems my (future) children would have, should I decide to marry the guy. While I may not be marrying his family, I
would be bringing a child into it; I want to feel comfortable about doing that. I want my children to be proud of both sides of their family. At a minimum, I want to protect them from having to descend from a family with a history of abuse, addictions, diseases, etc. Moreover, if something should happen to me or my family, I want to know that my children will be raised with a family whose values and traditions I respect.
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