I don't know how I feel about my sorority...

fascination · #1 03-12-2012, 01:42 PM

"There are a few outgoing people but a lot of the people are sort of introverted, stay-at-home, socially awkward-ish. (I got that vibe from them and some older members have mentioned it too)." Folks, she's 18, and most of us didn't know any better at that age, unless one is from a GLO background. Unfortunately, OP is stuck with what she has - or nothing. She is unlikely to be able to change the personalities of the majority of the existing members into what she is looking for. Whether she is willing to spend the upcoming semesters trying to find (recruit) a pool of potenial new members that would pledge next semester is up to her. Ten new, outgoing ladies could make a huge difference! Best of luck to her, and please don't be too hard on her for her honesty.

ASTalumna06 · #2 03-12-2012, 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fascination

"There are a few outgoing people but a lot of the people are sort of introverted, stay-at-home, socially awkward-ish. (I got that vibe from them and some older members have mentioned it too)." Folks, she's 18, and most of us didn't know any better at that age, unless one is from a GLO background. Unfortunately, OP is stuck with what she has - or nothing. She is unlikely to be able to change the personalities of the majority of the existing members into what she is looking for. Whether she is willing to spend the upcoming semesters trying to find (recruit) a pool of potenial new members that would pledge next semester is up to her. Ten new, outgoing ladies could make a huge difference! Best of luck to her, and please don't be too hard on her for her honesty.

Her honesty? She's talking about a group of girls that she hasn't even taken the time to get to know. Even in her quote you mentioned here, she said she "gets that vibe" and she's heard such things from older members - but she hasn't taken the time to even determine if it's true.

And even if it is, people can change. She doesn't have to make them something they're not, but being introverted can be temporary if you (general you) have sisters around you who push (not force) you to do things outside your comfort zone. When you have a group behind you, you're more likely to do things you normally wouldn't.

Maybe some of these girls have never stepped foot inside a fraternity house, and they just need someone to go with them. Maybe they've never performed on stage, but they'd be willing to participate in a small part for Greek Sing with their sisters cheering them on. You'd be surprised how much people can change when they have a little support from those around them. I've seen it happen.. Both in my sorority, and ouside of it as well.

DeltaBetaBaby · #3 03-12-2012, 03:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ASTalumna06

Her honesty? She's talking about a group of girls that she hasn't even taken the time to get to know. Even in her quote you mentioned here, she said she "gets that vibe" and she's heard such things from older members - but she hasn't taken the time to even determine if it's true.

And even if it is, people can change. She doesn't have to make them something they're not, but being introverted can be temporary if you (general you) have sisters around you who push (not force) you to do things outside your comfort zone. When you have a group behind you, you're more likely to do things you normally wouldn't.

Maybe some of these girls have never stepped foot inside a fraternity house, and they just need someone to go with them. Maybe they've never performed on stage, but they'd be willing to participate in a small part for Greek Sing with their sisters cheering them on. You'd be surprised how much people can change when they have a little support from those around them. I've seen it happen.. Both in my sorority, and ouside of it as well.

I know you didn't mean it this way, but your post reads as "introverted=bad, outgoing = good" as though introverts should go out of their way to change themselves. I agree, that many women benefit from new experiences while supported by their sisters, but maybe the OP should also try to enjoy some of the things her sisters like, too.

ASTalumna06 · #4 03-12-2012, 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

I know you didn't mean it this way, but your post reads as "introverted=bad, outgoing = good" as though introverts should go out of their way to change themselves. I agree, that many women benefit from new experiences while supported by their sisters, but maybe the OP should also try to enjoy some of the things her sisters like, too.

Oh, I completely agree.. But her complaint is that they're not doing things with fraternities, going to events, etc., and that they're all the stay-at-home, socially awkward type. And fascination implied that people can't change their personalities, which isn't true.

Only replying based on what's been said

fascination · #5 03-12-2012, 07:09 PM

I didn't mean to imply that the current members "can't" change. I said that OP is "unlikely to be able to change the personalities of the majority of the existing members into what she is looking for." The current members are under NO obligation to change for OP and may very well prefer things just the way they are. They were there first, after all. OP knew full well what kind of group she was joining; she just didn't know that she couldn't so easily un-join if she changed her mind. So, while she may not change the current members into the types of personalities with whom she wants to associate, she can make an effort to recruit new members more to her liking. The current members may approve, or they may not. Wish we had a happy, easy answer for her and every unhappy poster, but such is life.