Advice Please!

Originally Posted by 33girl

If you didn't like a group you didn't like it. That's fine. But to blame it on their "Christian ideals" really isn't accurate in this day and age when all 26 NPCs have clauses forbidding discrimination based on religion.

If THAT CHAPTER has a lot of girls who are into going to church multiple times a week, Bible study, witnessing their faith etc etc, just please know that it is THAT CHAPTER, and not the national organization as a whole. The chapter at the school 5 miles down the road might be filled with Druids.

This may sound like nitpicking to you, but a lot of chapter vs. national misconceptions come up in rush and those conceptions can harm our groups as far as future colonizations and such.

I'm not really blaming it on their "Christian ideals;" that's just how they are and that's fine, but it isn't for me. I'm not putting any sororities down for it or making judgments that "oh they must all be that way." I'm sure that every chapter is unique in their own way. It just wasn't for me. If we don't go by how we feel, how else can we figure out what is right for us? If I was even confused about what to do I would have stuck it out. I really like the idea of helping start a new chapter at my school, it would be a great opportunity to start something great. No offense to the other sororities, but when my top choice didn't choose me, my heart wasn't even the least bit in it with the remaining sororities. It's hard when your school has only 4 compared to others that have as many as 16.

[ree-Xi]

Originally Posted by renlizabeth

I'm not really blaming it on their "Christian ideals;" that's just how they are and that's fine, but it isn't for me. I'm not putting any sororities down for it or making judgments that "oh they must all be that way." I'm sure that every chapter is unique in their own way. It just wasn't for me. If we don't go by how we feel, how else can we figure out what is right for us? If I was even confused about what to do I would have stuck it out. I really like the idea of helping start a new chapter at my school, it would be a great opportunity to start something great. No offense to the other sororities, but when my top choice didn't choose me, my heart wasn't even the least bit in it with the remaining sororities. It's hard when your school has only 4 compared to others that have as many as 16.

But you didn't give the other three a fair chance. You didn't have enough information to make that decision.

How do you know you'll like the new chapter? You probably know as much (meaning as little, or less) as you do about the four on campus. But alas, what do I know?

So what kind of advice are you possibly asking for?

Originally Posted by ree-Xi

But you didn't give the other three a fair chance. You didn't have enough information to make that decision.

How do you know you'll like the new chapter? You probably know as much (meaning as little, or less) as you do about the four on campus. But alas, what do I know?

So what kind of advice are you possibly asking for?

As I stated previously, I did hang out with the girls from the sororities before recruitment when they would gather all together. I didn't feel a connection to them in that way throughout the whole time. So it depends on what you mean by not having enough information. There is no guarantee with a new chapter, but if I get in then I can help start it and make it great. It's hard when you already have an established sorority and you're trying to get in as a junior and also try to get a position.

I guess the advice i was asking for was if going through the recruitment process with the new colony would be a good idea and also if I made the right decision by not going with sororities i felt absolutely NO connection to (and not just during recruitment). Not to mention one of them I haven't talked much about seemed absolutely BORED during recruitment.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by renlizabeth

I guess the advice i was asking for was...also if I made the right decision by not going with sororities i felt absolutely NO connection to (and not just during recruitment). Not to mention one of them I haven't talked much about seemed absolutely BORED during recruitment.

If that's a question, no, you didn't make the right decision.

No one is saying you should have signed a bid with a group that you weren't feeling at all, but just going to the parties and trying to make conversation might have helped you a lot in getting over your shyness.

Originally Posted by 33girl

If that's a question, no, you didn't make the right decision.

No one is saying you should have signed a bid with a group that you weren't feeling at all, but just going to the parties and trying to make conversation might have helped you a lot in getting over your shyness.

I went to most of them.

[AOII Angel]

I doubt very seriously that you hung out with the sororities in a significant manner so that you actually know all the women enough to say that you wouldn't fit in with any of them. By all of your posts, you sound very much like someone who judges a book by its cover. Even in a campus with just 4 groups, there are generally enough women in each that you can't meet them all in just a few parties, and lord knows you can't get to know even one women well enough in 20 minutes to truly bond with her. If your going to make the colony thing work, your going to need a major attitude adjustment or an adjustment of your expectations. There are many things in life that you have to go on other than your "gut." You are in school to improve the function of your brain. Use it.

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

I doubt very seriously that you hung out with the sororities in a significant manner so that you actually know all the women enough to say that you wouldn't fit in with any of them. By all of your posts, you sound very much like someone who judges a book by its cover. Even in a campus with just 4 groups, there are generally enough women in each that you can't meet them all in just a few parties, and lord knows you can't get to know even one women well enough in 20 minutes to truly bond with her. If your going to make the colony thing work, your going to need a major attitude adjustment or an adjustment of your expectations. There are many things in life that you have to go on other than your "gut." You are in school to improve the function of your brain. Use it.

The parties lasted about an hour with each sorority which I stuck through for a few days of recruitment and because my school is so small I was able to hang out with them in a significant manner. I have not judged anyone based on first impressions, these are my judgements after MANY tries at getting to know them. As far as I'm concerned choosing something like a sorority is not solely based on using someone's brain. If it is a mutual selection process and I am not in it because my instincts tell me otherwise, then I'm ignoring one of the most basic instincts. Your feelings and your brain are connected and I'm sure that you have not gone through with something because something inside of you wasn't making you feel right about it. I had no expectations going into recruitment except to enjoy myself and keep an open mind---which I did. But again if I'm not feeling good about something (let alone something that costs hundreds of dollars that no one is giving me) I want to feel as good about that decision as possible. Just because someone tells you "it might get better," what about all the girls who followed that advice and aren't happy at all. So this is my conclusion after I did USE MY BRAIN. So you can go and use your brain to stop making general assumptions about someone based on very little knowledge because right now you're judging a book by its cover.