Boyfriend Hazing

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by nmarti36

This is my first time posting in a forum of this nature so perhaps I made a newbie's mistake by divulging too much. I quickly found out which parts those were and regret including them. However, despite what you may believe, I came solely for enlightenment on how to handle the introduction of greek life in our relationship. I do not seek strangers for opinions on whether I should terminate my relationships or not. Clearly I made a mistake in anticipating solely factually based opinions and I should have phrased my post differently.

It boils down to asking strangers what to do with your relationship. There are no "factually based" opinions on this matter and it is not up to you to determine how we will respond to you. You are not in control once you create the thread.

Your question was answered long before you chose to respond to LatinaAlumna.

[nmarti36]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

It boils down to asking strangers what to do with your relationship. There are no "factually based" opinions on this matter and it is not up to you to determine how we will respond to you. You are not in control once you create the thread.

Your question was answered long before you chose to respond to LatinaAlumna.

You're right. I've gotten all the answers I need. Whatever happens to this thread afterward is no longer my concern. I will be more cautious in the future should I choose to participate in any forum.

[nmarti36]

Thanks to everyone for your input!

[Munchkin03]

...and there's the Flounce.

[Senusret I]

It's not a flounce.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by LatinaAlumna

@ BluePhire:

The primary reason I posted was the 5 years off/on at (presumably) such a young age, and I should have called them both idiots.

Moi aussi.

If they aren't sympatico enough after that long that she can understand what he's talking about, at that age, time to pack it in.

Also, re me following "the politically correct representation of [my] organization" - pray tell BluPhire, is this your very first rodeo?

[DrPhil]

33girl is anything but politically correct.

[BluPhire]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Moi aussi.

If they aren't sympatico enough after that long that she can understand what he's talking about, at that age, time to pack it in.

Also, re me following "the politically correct representation of [my] organization" - pray tell BluPhire, is this your very first rodeo?

Only with you. I don't interact with you much, but as time goes on I am learning more about each of you. (and don't take that as a I choose to ignore you, its just we just don't always post in the same subjects)

But I will be the first to apologize for jumping to a conclusion based off of what I read. The answer when I read it seemed like the typical, "Hazing is wrong and our organizations don't condone hazing...blah blah blah."

[LatinaAlumna]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

They are idiots for being on/off at a young age? College age is the only time on/off relationships make sense as far as I'm concerned.

On/off relationships never make sense to me. I think it's silly to waste five years of your life trying to make it work with somebody, especially in high school/college when there is an abundance of people to meet. Just cut the cord and find someone else instead of trying over and over again. If it was a good relationship, they would most likely be "on" the whole time.


Neither you nor the OP know what was done to him.[/QUOTE]

Yep

[LatinaAlumna]

Originally Posted by nmarti36

For someone who is using my alleged immaturity as an argument you're not making a great case for yourself. You have no knowledge of me, my boyfriend, or our history outside of this context. Therefore you have no right to pass judgment on me or him for a relationship you know nothing about. Obviously if we've been on and off for five years it's because we've had our struggles but have time and time again come to the conclusion that we'd like to work through them. We were very young when our relationship started, hence why it didn't work out before. We were adolescents in the midst of growing pains that warped our perspectives. Now we are adults, trying our best to work things out. No relationship comes without its struggles. I did not come here to get your criticism on my judgment and my relationship. I came here seeking knowledge about something I know very little about in the hopes of understanding someone I care about. So how about you take your blind, ignorant accusations elsewhere.

Okay, then. Stand by your man, no matter what! I think that's what you wanted to hear, and at least one person gave you advice on how to approach the whole fraternity issue. Are you okay now?

[33girl]

Originally Posted by BluPhire

Only with you. I don't interact with you much, but as time goes on I am learning more about each of you. (and don't take that as a I choose to ignore you, its just we just don't always post in the same subjects)

But I will be the first to apologize for jumping to a conclusion based off of what I read. The answer when I read it seemed like the typical, "Hazing is wrong and our organizations don't condone hazing...blah blah blah."

It's all good honey pie.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by LatinaAlumna

On/off relationships never make sense to me. I think it's silly to waste five years of your life trying to make it work with somebody, especially in high school/college when there is an abundance of people to meet. Just cut the cord and find someone else instead of trying over and over again. If it was a good relationship, they would most likely be "on" the whole time.

College is a time when not everything makes sense and that's the learning process.

On/off relationships never made sense to me when I was a high school student,** when I was a college student, or now that I'm in my almost mid-30s. But, that's how I've lived my life. I definitely don't think those who have lived theirs differently in this regard are automatically idiots.

** relationships, period, didn't make sense to me when I was in high school...and kind of when I was in college

[LatinaAlumna]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I definitely don't think those who have lived theirs differently in this regard are automatically idiots.

Good job, I guess.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by LatinaAlumna

Good job, I guess.

I wish I could say the same for you, even sarcastically.

[LatinaAlumna]

^Do (or don't do) whatever you feel is best.