Lavalier?

[ΘΦΑlovesΣΝ]

Originally Posted by TSteven

I am not a Sigma Nu, but I would guess that you are not suppose to know any of their secrets even after y'all are married.

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

LOL at the implication that the day I say "I do" I need to spill my sorority ritual to my new hubby.

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

I will not be doing that. My mother is a Kappa Delta and even in discussions about ritual we never reveal secrets to each other. And she's my mom.

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Yep, I can assure you that after 20+ years, my wife and I still haven't shared any ritual secrets. Wouldn't occur to either of us.

Okay, so there are two things wrong with these replies: 1. You aren't a Sigma Nu, so you wouldn't know if they are able to disclose information to their wives or not. And I didn't mean to imply that he could disclose all aspects of their ritual to me anyway. And 2. I never said anything about telling him about my sorority's ritual. No one excepted initiated sisters are allowed to know about Theta Phi's ritual -- no family members or husbands. I was not implying that all or any married Greek couples can or should reveal their secrets to their spouses.

And I don't appreciate your negative comments when all I've been trying to do is gain information and advice. I would appreciate it if you thought about what you were saying and assuming before you posted a reply.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by ΘΦΑlovesΣΝ

Okay, so there are two things wrong with these replies: 1. You aren't a Sigma Nu, so you wouldn't know if they are able to disclose information to their wives or not. And I didn't mean to imply that he could disclose all aspects of their ritual to me anyway. And 2. I never said anything about telling him about my sorority's ritual. No one excepted initiated sisters are allowed to know about Theta Phi's ritual -- no family members or husbands. I was not implying that all or any married Greek couples can or should reveal their secrets to their spouses.

There seems to be a contradiction here. If you were not implying the bolded then don't you essentially agree with them?

Originally Posted by ΘΦΑlovesΣΝ

And I don't appreciate your negative comments when all I've been trying to do is gain information and advice. I would appreciate it if you thought about what you were saying and assuming before you posted a reply.

The tone of your post was negative. Theirs was not. You ignored MysticCat's congratulations.

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by ΘΦΑlovesΣΝ

Okay, so there are two things wrong with these replies: 1. You aren't a Sigma Nu, so you wouldn't know if they are able to disclose information to their wives or not. And I didn't mean to imply that he could disclose all aspects of their ritual to me anyway.

No, that's exactly what you said.

I am not "connected" to Sigma Nu or allowed to know any of their secrets until I am married to him.

Your boyfriend may be a collegiate member. That's fantastic. I am a chapter advisor, chapter co-founder, co-founder of an alumni chapter and various subsidiary entities. I have a much more than passing familiarity with the ritual and with fraternity secrets, the rules promulgated by our national legislative body, etc. In short, believe me when I tell you this: If your boyfriend told you that he gets to tell you ANY ritual information when you are married, he is grossly mistaken. I'm not trying to be rude or nasty or anything like that--just trying to be clear in my meaning. The only thing which changes when you are married to this guy is that you will be able to wear his badge--and you will already have been able to do that once you became engaged (this, according to rules promulgated by the aforementioned national legislative body). You won't get to know what the badge means or any symbolism behind it whatsoever unless he wants to violate his oath and put his lifetime membership on the line.

And I don't appreciate your negative comments when all I've been trying to do is gain information and advice. I would appreciate it if you thought about what you were saying and assuming before you posted a reply.

I haven't read the thread, but I'll weigh in. I'm assuming the question is about lavaliering. Lavaliering is not addressed by our organization in any way, shape or form on a national level. Individual chapters are free to have their own traditions which usually are just the same as the traditions for everyone else in that region or on that particular campus.

I'm guessing that like a lot of traditions, lavaliering goes back to some jeweler wanting to sell cheaply made gold jewelry to college students paying with daddy's money. As for the badge itself, it may be worn by fiancées (and I'm guessing fiancés as well [these are the 2000s, you know]) and daughters. To be clear, it may not be worn by girlfriends or even people who have exchanged 'promise rings.'

Do it, don't do it, whatever. I truly wish you two the best.