Hi, my name is Joseph... and I have a problem.

JosephWang · #1 08-03-2007, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kathykd2005

Go to a dating service.

Yeah, like eharmony? What a nightmare. You jump through several hoops to get to an open communication stage and then you meet IRL and it's terrible... the person was nothing like they said, or they have kids or major baggage... I'm not saying I'm perfect, but at least I didn't run up $50K on credit cards to buy shoes.

It's kind of tough being in your thirties and looking for a mate that isn't all used up or an alcoholic or something. Savor your 20s!

kathykd2005 · #2 08-03-2007, 08:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JosephWang

Yeah, like eharmony? What a nightmare. You jump through several hoops to get to an open communication stage and then you meet IRL and it's terrible... the person was nothing like they said, or they have kids or major baggage... I'm not saying I'm perfect, but at least I didn't run up $50K on credit cards to buy shoes.

It's kind of tough being in your thirties and looking for a mate that isn't all used up or an alcoholic or something. Savor your 20s!

I'm married so I don't have to savor my twenties, or look for dates online. You seem like you have a lot of excuses. How about a little less whining and a little more action? It's Friday night, go out and have some fun.

JosephWang · #3 08-03-2007, 09:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kathykd2005

I'm married so I don't have to savor my twenties, or look for dates online. You seem like you have a lot of excuses.

Well, good for you, but it sounds like you're bragging. No, I'm not as lucky as you to get married and always have someone there for you.

As for getting out, I've been getting out now for years and years and it hasn't really led to happiness in all those thousands of tries... I mean, in terms of finding something serious. You'll probably tell me to go to Starbucks or Borders Book Store or the Grocery Store or a Bar. And all those places suck.

I'm happy you don't have to look for dates online; I know I'm pathetic by comparison.

kathykd2005 · #4 08-03-2007, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JosephWang

Well, good for you, but it sounds like you're bragging. No, I'm not as lucky as you to get married and always have someone there for you.

Bragging? No, I'm just replying to what you told me to do--to savor my twenties. I don't have to, because I'm married and there's no need to do so. You sound like you're having a pity party to me.

AKA_Monet · #5 08-03-2007, 10:39 PM

I am probably going to get slammed for this:

Joseph, have you talked to a professional? How is that working for you? You seem to have some self-esteem issues that are now hurting your morale.

Your post should be moved to the "Dating and Relationships" topic because your issues are relevant to interpersonal relationships. Also, GC is not "Jerry Springer" where you should feel empowered to dump your feelings on unsuspecting GC discussants...

How should one encounter your pain and suffering? (Who isn't licensed)

Joseph, I am going to ask you another question because I am trying to understand what is going on with you: by posting your concerns, what is it that you expect to gain from it?

JosephWang · #6 08-03-2007, 10:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

I am probably going to get slammed for this:

Joseph, have you talked to a professional? How is that working for you? You seem to have some self-esteem issues that are now hurting your morale.

Your post should be moved to the "Dating and Relationships" topic because your issues are relevant to interpersonal relationships. Also, GC is not "Jerry Springer" where you should feel empowered to dump your feelings on unsuspecting GC discussants...

How should one encounter your pain and suffering? (Who isn't licensed)

Joseph, I am going to ask you another question because I am trying to understand what is going on with you: by posting your concerns, what is it that you expect to gain from it?

No, I have not talked to a professional. Believe it or not, I like the anonymity of posting on the internet. I have included a bit of personal information, but not so much as you could identify me in any way.

I come from a family that says the same things I've heard in this thread so far: get a hobby, get buff, change your behavior, bootstraps, bootstraps. And definitely don't talk to a shrink.

In a way, I agree with them. Just because you have a degree means nothing, a good friend or family member can listen just as well if they are inclined. But I'm really very private with these issues, which is why I prefer forums such as this.

I disagree that I've dumped on anyone, though. I understand that a board has to be moderated to keep things decent, but if people just want to post emoticons and say only pleasant things, well, that's kind of boring. The discussion actually turns from substance to content and categorization and appropriateness.

What I expect to get from posting: what anyone expect to get from posting... maybe a good discussion where we learn from each other.

icelandelf · #7 08-03-2007, 11:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JosephWang

What I expect to get from posting: what anyone expect to get from posting... maybe a good discussion where we learn from each other.

Are you trying to tell us we can do better?

AKA_Monet · #8 08-04-2007, 12:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JosephWang

No, I have not talked to a professional. Believe it or not, I like the anonymity of posting on the internet. I have included a bit of personal information, but not so much as you could identify me in any way.

I come from a family that says the same things I've heard in this thread so far: get a hobby, get buff, change your behavior, bootstraps, bootstraps. And definitely don't talk to a shrink.

In a way, I agree with them. Just because you have a degree means nothing, a good friend or family member can listen just as well if they are inclined. But I'm really very private with these issues, which is why I prefer forums such as this.

You may be right in your own pursuits and fancy, however, since your brain is a organ and tissue, it can get sick just like any other part of your body... Some psychological professionals are trained to assist you come to an civilized conclusion satisfactory to your psyche. Moreover, a psychiatrist who is a medical doctor can prescribe medications that can heal the illness that your genetics in your brain suffers.

It is cool to "stand on your own 2 feet" and "lift yourself up by your own bootstraps". However, it is more humane to yourself as well as everyone else when we live in a civilized society when you can accept the fact that you need help...

Quote:

I disagree that I've dumped on anyone, though...The discussion actually turns from substance to content and categorization and appropriateness.

What I expect to get from posting: what anyone expect to get from posting... maybe a good discussion where we learn from each other.

IMHO, you should have posted in the "Dating and Relationships". Yes, I know, big whoopdee doo... But, you are saying you want to learn something from each other... Well, I am quite learned and I have several degrees. But, what I have most, is life experience from very bad storms in my life... So, I know it hurts.

How come you are so very hot and bothered by one woman?