What would raise a yellow, or red flag on a 1st date for you?

[Scandia]

Originally Posted by PeppyGPhiB

I'm happily attached now, but when dating there are a few things that will make you lose points or strike out with me...


- You answer your cell phone on a date. "It might have been an emergency..."? Yeah, right! It's never an emergency. Let them leave a message, then check your messages when you get up later to go to the restroom.

On our fourth date, which had not been going well, the previous guy I dated answered his cell phone while we waited to be seated at the comedy club. He talked to the person for a few minutes. I asked who it was- could have been a relative or a business call. Turns out it was a girl he had met and had gone on one date with him a couple weeks earlier. I asked if he was interested in her- he said no, that he must have been drunk when he asked her out, and that they did not have fun at all. Me having had trouble learning manners when I was a child, and since he did not make another date with her and it could have been an emergency on her part, I let it rest. But after the show, in the car, he got really huffy about my having a problem with his dating other girls and made it very clear he NEVER said we were dating exclusively. There was a fifth date eventually, but in it he confirmed that he was looking for a woman who was very different from who I am.

- You refer to your exes as "psycho" and blame them for your breakups. Just because you don't like her anymore doesn't mean you get to call her bipolar or psycho. Anyways, I've discovered her anger is maybe because of something YOU did.

A relative of mine did have a girlfriend who was bipolar. They broke up because one day she beat him up due to there not being any more cereal in the pantry- even though the grocery store was in the ground floor of the building and she could easily buy more.

- You're very recently divorced or coming out of a serious relationship, or you're "separated.


- You used to live with your girlfriend. This may not strike you out, but it will probably make you a little "tainted" in my book.

If you have this kind of experience, why would you want a maiden like me?

[AlexMack]

Originally Posted by Scandia

If you have this kind of experience, why would you want a maiden like me?

Why not? It's refreshing for some. Trying not to be explicit but someone with experience in all matters of relationships is far better than another who's as inexperienced as you. I've been on both sides. Inexperience is awkward, so awkward. If a guy really loves you for you, your inexperience won't matter. If you love him for him, you won't hold his past relationships against him.
I really do suggest expanding your field a little. You don't have to compromise your morals to find someone as wonderful as you're holding out for.

[PeppyGPhiB]

Originally Posted by Scandia

A relative of mine did have a girlfriend who was bipolar. They broke up because one day she beat him up due to there not being any more cereal in the pantry- even though the grocery store was in the ground floor of the building and she could easily buy more.

In my post, I was referring to guys that slap that label on all their exes because it seems to be a convenient way to label her as the bad one in the relationship. I've heard it from almost all the guys I've dated as a twenty-something, to the point where I've actually questioned them about it.