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07-25-2010, 04:02 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 9
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Are there any relationship experts here? Very serious question. Help.
Hi, my name is Dwight and I've been viewing Greek Chat for a few months, now. During those months, I noticed all the professional people on here as I was reading posts. Hopfully, there's someone or maybe many here that can help me. I'm very serious because I think my girlfriend is ready to leave me. Please don't make fun of me.
Everything is good between the two of us except for when we have sex. We've been together for a little over a year, and she's just now telling me that my performance in bed is really poor. I was very hurt by that when she told me, but I was also glad she was upfront and honest with me. She kind of hinted to it about 6 months ago. Whenever I would ask her how I was she would just smile but never really give me a direct answer. I asked her what is was that I needed to work on, and she told me that I need to go longer. I try, but I can't help it. Two to three minutes and then it's over. According to her, it's about 30 to 45 seconds, but I know that's not true always. That's only when we haven't done it in a few days. I'm only 22 and I've even tried viagra, but I don't like using it because I stay erect for so long and it begins to hurt. I love having sex with her, but I don't like the after effect, because she doesn't say anything and even during sex, she just lays there. Then when I'm done she rubs my back and pats me on it as if to say get up, you're horrible. It seems like she just wants me to finish. I really love her but I'm afraid she's going to leave me. Has anyone else experienced this? Can someone please help me? I don't want to lose her.
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07-25-2010, 04:18 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Occupied Territory CSA
Posts: 2,237
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She's just not happy with you.
And I'll QFP just in case.
__________________
Overall, though, it's the bigness of the car that counts the most. Because when something bad happens in a really big car accidentally speeding through the middle of a gang of unruly young people who have been taunting you in a drive-in restaurant, for instance it happens very far away way out at the end of your fenders. It's like a civil war in Africa; you know, it doesn't really concern you too much. - P.J. O'Rourke
Last edited by Elephant Walk; 07-25-2010 at 05:33 AM.
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07-25-2010, 05:33 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Occupied Territory CSA
Posts: 2,237
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dwight
Hi, my name is Dwight and I've been viewing Greek Chat for a few months, now. During those months, I noticed all the professional people on here as I was reading posts. Hopfully, there's someone or maybe many here that can help me. I'm very serious because I think my girlfriend is ready to leave me. Please don't make fun of me.
Everything is good between the two of us except for when we have sex. We've been together for a little over a year, and she's just now telling me that my performance in bed is really poor. I was very hurt by that when she told me, but I was also glad she was upfront and honest with me. She kind of hinted to it about 6 months ago. Whenever I would ask her how I was she would just smile but never really give me a direct answer. I asked her what is was that I needed to work on, and she told me that I need to go longer. I try, but I can't help it. Two to three minutes and then it's over. According to her, it's about 30 to 45 seconds, but I know that's not true always. That's only when we haven't done it in a few days. I'm only 22 and I've even tried viagra, but I don't like using it because I stay erect for so long and it begins to hurt. I love having sex with her, but I don't like the after effect, because she doesn't say anything and even during sex, she just lays there. Then when I'm done she rubs my back and pats me on it as if to say get up, you're horrible. It seems like she just wants me to finish. I really love her but I'm afraid she's going to leave me. Has anyone else experienced this? Can someone please help me? I don't want to lose her.
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QFP'd
__________________
Overall, though, it's the bigness of the car that counts the most. Because when something bad happens in a really big car accidentally speeding through the middle of a gang of unruly young people who have been taunting you in a drive-in restaurant, for instance it happens very far away way out at the end of your fenders. It's like a civil war in Africa; you know, it doesn't really concern you too much. - P.J. O'Rourke
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07-25-2010, 05:43 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elephant Walk
She's just not happy with you.
And I'll QFP just in case. |
Please don't tease me. She's happy with our relationship, she's just not happy with my performance in bed. I'm asking to see if anyone else has had this experience? Have you experienced this? Your thoughts without being disrespectful would be appreciated.
Last edited by Dwight; 07-25-2010 at 05:54 AM.
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07-25-2010, 06:44 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 398
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dwight
Please don't tease me. She's happy with our relationship, she's just not happy with my performance in bed. I'm asking to see if anyone else has had this experience? Have you experienced this? Your thoughts without being disrespectful would be appreciated.
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Sorry bud, but you're in the wrong place for that type of advice. People are going to tease you. If you've been viewing these boards for a while you should know what kind of a response posts like this recieve...
__________________
()---,, Nobody knows how happy I am!
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07-25-2010, 07:38 AM
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Moderator
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Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Hotel Oceanview
Posts: 34,516
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OK, I'm assuming you perform oral sex on her regularly and for a long time, correct? You've honed your technique to what she likes, correct? If you have done both those things, and she's still complaining...
Some people can have relationships that are great everywhere else, but just aren't compatible in bed. It has nothing to do with being "good" or "bad" or time or circumference or length or any of that stuff.
It's also something you cannot force. Sometimes two people just do not fit.
You guys would probably be fine if you were 80, but when you're in your 20s sex is a big part of a relationship for most people. I know this isn't the answer you want, but unless you'd be OK with her seeking sex outside of your relationship, you should probably end it now.
(I sound like Dan Savage in this post.)
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It is all 33girl's fault. ~DrPhil
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07-25-2010, 09:08 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 13,578
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl
(I sound like Dan Savage in this post.)
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I love Dan Savage. OP should just listen to his podcasts. All of them.
__________________
From the SigmaTo the K!
Polyamorous, Pansexual and Proud of it!
It Gets Better
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07-25-2010, 10:24 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: N 37.811092 W -107.664643
Posts: 5,317
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Dwight,
You lost your badge.
And you have relationship problems for which you are seeking advice from anonymous strangers on the Internet.
There is a pattern here.
__________________
"One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." Bertrand Russell, The Triumph of Stupidity
Last edited by AZTheta; 07-25-2010 at 10:36 AM.
Reason: corrected MY mistake!
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07-25-2010, 06:41 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Greater New York
Posts: 4,537
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AzTheta
Dwight,
You lost your badge.
And you have relationship problems for which you are seeking advice from anonymous strangers on the Internet.
There is a pattern here.
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hahahaha
this post made me laugh
__________________
Love Conquers All
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07-25-2010, 11:26 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl
OK, I'm assuming you perform oral sex on her regularly and for a long time, correct? You've honed your technique to what she likes, correct? If you have done both those things, and she's still complaining...
Some people can have relationships that are great everywhere else, but just aren't compatible in bed. It has nothing to do with being "good" or "bad" or time or circumference or length or any of that stuff.
It's also something you cannot force. Sometimes two people just do not fit.
You guys would probably be fine if you were 80, but when you're in your 20s sex is a big part of a relationship for most people. I know this isn't the answer you want, but unless you'd be OK with her seeking sex outside of your relationship, you should probably end it now.
(I sound like Dan Savage in this post.)
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I had to stop giving her oral sex. I never told her and I feel bad, but I can't take the stinch in that area. Whenever I would have oral sex with her, I would have to turn away periodically as I was doing it because of the smell.
I don't want to break it off, because I really love her. I wish there was a way to fix this. Thanks a lot for the advice. I think you have a point.
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07-26-2010, 02:03 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: NooYawk
Posts: 5,478
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*slowly backs out of thread*
__________________
ONE LOVE, For All My Life
Talented, tested, tenacious, and true...
A woman of diversity through and through.
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07-26-2010, 02:59 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 328
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Ahahahahahaha! ROFL...
Seriously though, there are professional sex counselors available. They're usually for married couples, but if you're comfortable enough talking it out with her, you might want to seek out one of those with her. It might just fix up everything.
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07-26-2010, 03:32 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Twin Cities
Posts: 6,715
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__________________
The world system is in direct opposition to God and His Word PrettyBoy The R35 GT-R doesnt ask for permission. It takes control, rewrites the rules, and proves that AWD means All-Wheel Dominance PrettyBoy
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07-26-2010, 03:33 AM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Counting my blessings!
Posts: 31,316
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Seriously, see a sex therapist or, if you're religious, a premarital counselor. Whatever you do, don't ask my exhusband!
__________________
~ *~"ADPi"~*~
♥Proud to be a Macon Magnolia ♥
"He who is not busy being born is busy dying." Bob Dylan
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07-26-2010, 03:45 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Taking flight
Posts: 2,585
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Quote:
Originally Posted by preciousjeni
*slowly backs out of thread*
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i'm leaving with you but coming back to peek...lol.
__________________
"where my knights at!? why aren't ya'll representin??" - KASS
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