My Live Spring Rush Story

Originally Posted by OHNOITSJESS

I was working on starting a local among female engineers and affiliating with a national engineering org eventually.... but our Pan-Hellenic is causing so many problems with it I don't think it can happen, at least not before I graduate....

How are they causing problems with it? Your campus' Panhellenic can't stop you from starting your own local.

[FSUZeta]

and a national engineering sorority for women would likely not fall under the umbrella of the collegiate panhellenic council anyway. it's a different type of greek organization.

why don't you contact the national office of the engineering sorority directly and see what it takes to establish a chapter at your school?

honestly, it sounds like you are going to be way busy, with classes, work, boyfriend. i think you made the practical choice to not pursue npc membership.
congratulations on your scholarship!

[AlwaysSAI]

The only thing I would say is:

You shouldn't let your boyfriend's situation affect what you do in college. It is not your job to support him for grad school, bills, whatever. You are not his wife and it is up to him to take care of his own business.

I know you and your boyfriend are serious right now, but take it from someone that's been there--things change. And, if you let this job-so-I-can-help-my-bf thing stop you from pursuing sorority membership or anything else you will always regret it--especially if you two don't get married in the end.

I've been there. I was with a guy for three years and we were talking about marriage and then one day he didn't want me anymore.

But, at the end of the day, you have to be happy with the choice you made.

[SigKapSweetie]

Is the point to this that you can't join a sorority because you have to get a job to support your boyfriend?

If so...fail.

[SWTXBelle]

Originally Posted by AlwaysSAI

The only thing I would say is:

You shouldn't let your boyfriend's situation affect what you do in college. It is not your job to support him for grad school, bills, whatever. You are not his wife and it is up to him to take care of his own business.

I know you and your boyfriend are serious right now, but take it from someone that's been there--things change. And, if you let this job-so-I-can-help-my-bf thing stop you from pursuing sorority membership or anything else you will always regret it--especially if you two don't get married in the end.

I've been there. I was with a guy for three years and we were talking about marriage and then one day he didn't want me anymore.

But, at the end of the day, you have to be happy with the choice you made.

Co-sign.

[indygphib]

Originally Posted by AlwaysSAI

It is not your job to support him for grad school, bills, whatever. You are not his wife and it is up to him to take care of his own business.

Ditto.

[OHNOITSJESS]

to answer all your questions:

We have formed the local, but in the process of affiliating with the national social engineering org, we have to get certain paperwork [ie: Panhellenic and Student Life Guidelines, Panhellenic Grade Policies, Student Life Grade Policies]. When i contacted Panhellenic about this they said that since the national is classified as a SOCIAL org [even outside of the PHC] they have to give approval to be on campus. The PC said since we were a SOCIAL org and not a Professional, or honor, they have to approve us. I've had a national rep contact our PHC, but nothing has happened so far. [and they haven't given us the info] I wasn't trying to affiliate with Panhellenic, i've heard of it being done, but i've been discouraged at doing so from our pahnellenic. I was trying to make a social org affiliated with the college of engineering, i even had approval from the dean.

As for my boyfriend, I'm not getting a job to support him. It's so I can have some money of my own. I've never had a job, and my parents take care of everything [they feel is important: School and groceries is pretty much all of it] and while i am grateful to come from that kind of situtaion, i would like to earn my own money. The money i hopefully will earn is mostly for my independence, while he will get some of it for gas money [he drives me around since i don't have a car, ironic right?]... and if we do end up married [which i know we might not], i want to be able to contribute something to the bank, so i don't just walk in and not have earned anything [ i don't want to walk in like that to ANY marriage].

i agree with everyones concern and he knows that the money i earn will be 90% me 10% gas money for him. although of the 90% that comes to me, a lot of it will go into savings for my grad school. I guess he wants me to take care of my business so if we do end up together i won't have to worry about his grad school bills and he won't have to worry about mine... my family doesn't believe in college loans and his dad is pretty well set financially, so we both look at our educations as hard earned gifts from our parents....

sorry for making it seem like the ONLY AND SOLE reason for getting a job was to support my beau.... trust me its not, i'm not that dependent, and thats not how i work.

[gee_ess]

I just re-read this whole thread, and I think you sound like a very mature young woman with a good head on her shoulders.

If your social org does not work out, don't forget that good friendships and sisterhood can be found in a variety of places and situations. Being a part of a group with a common bond/interest/ideals is the basis of most sororities, and that can happen with any group. Even something as simple as volunteering at a local soup kitchen every Tuesday can become a sorority of sorts. You will bond with your fellow volunteers and those you help.

[FSUZeta]

jess, are you dealing with the campus panhellenic council or are you dealing with the greek life office? my reason for asking is that if you are dealing with the panhellenic council , the collegiate officers will most likely not have the experience or knowledge that the greek life advisor, or the dean of students would have.

[OHNOITSJESS]

Originally Posted by FSUZeta

jess, are you dealing with the campus panhellenic council or are you dealing with the greek life office? my reason for asking is that if you are dealing with the panhellenic council , the collegiate officers will most likely not have the experience or knowledge that the greek life advisor, or the dean of students would have.

The lady i am working with the is Panhellenic Advisor. I assume she's part of the Greek Life Office. She's a full time non-student advisor....

[33girl]

Originally Posted by OHNOITSJESS

The lady i am working with the is Panhellenic Advisor. I assume she's part of the Greek Life Office. She's a full time non-student advisor....

It doesn't mean she knows her butt from a hole in the ground.

Have the national engineering sorority lady contact the head of the Greek Life office AND the head of the Student Life office.

You don't want to be in Panhel so you shouldn't be taking any direction from them or their advisor, any more than the Young Democrats or a new fraternity for men would.

[OHNOITSJESS]

well i emailed them a while back, and no reply.
i'm going to wait until i get back to my campus [July 4th], and talk to the Panhellenic and Student Life Advisors.

BTW here is the letter i got:

Hi Jess, can you tell me more about your organization? If it is an engineering honor sorority, you will need to go through the Student Union and Activities office. If it is a social sorority, then you will have to obtain the approval of the Panhellenic Association.


Panhellenic sororities are affiliated with the National Panhellenic Conference and have a lengthy extension process that requires the current sororities to vote approve a new sorority. Our campus is not currently open for extension, therefore a vote would have to be conducted to determine if an organization is going to be permitted to participate in Panhellenic as an associate member.

Associate members of Panhellenic are still expected to follow the same risk management, social function, and hazing policies as well as recruitment rules.

Please provide me more information regarding this organization that you would like to start.

[33girl]

Just let her know that it is a social/professional sorority, NOT part of NPC, and you will not be rushing in the same way as the members will all be engineering students. Do they have SAI at your school?

[SoCalGirl]

My school has a social engineering sorority. They are associate members of the CPC.

[AlwaysSAI]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Do they have SAI at your school?

Thanks for the shout out, 33! Jess, if you want more info on SAI, PM me.