What do you feel like saying, right now?

[Phrozen Sands]

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

So, I started it and then I stopped like halfway through the first or second part. The episodes kind of blended together because I fell asleep, lol. Honestly, it got really boring. I didn’t like it. I mean, not because marriage isn’t complex, but because they were. The couples. I just saw a lot of immaturity, emotional laziness, and most of them seemed more invested in being right than actually growing.

And it wasn’t just the women or just the men, I felt that both sides were stuck in this loop of blaming instead of building. Like that “provision” guy, I mean, he just kept talking about “what he saw his dad do,” but he’s unemployed with zero plan. That’s not generational modeling, that’s generational name dropping. I mean, that guy was using his father as a talking point, not as a blueprint. That’s like performative masculinity, not real leadership. Know what I mean?

And the women? Oh dear God! Like, you’re not going to nag someone into becoming who you want. That’s not marriage, that’s control with a ring on it. Some of them looked ready to leave over things that hadn’t even been fully confronted, but I also know some people come into marriage carrying scars. I just think that if you never take responsibility for your patterns, you’ll repeat them in your next relationship too. It’s just that many people drag their past into their future and then blame the new partner for triggering old wounds. I mean, healing isn’t external, I think it should be internal first. Marriage doesn’t erase dysfunction, it magnifies it. That’s why what’s unhealed gets repeated, especially when there’s no accountability.

What bothered me most was how little ownership anyone took. Everyone was “unfulfilled” but no one was asking, “What’s it like to be married to me?” That’s the question that separates mature couples from messy ones. I just think that it takes maturity to ask not what your spouse isn’t doing, but how you’re contributing to the tension.

I don’t think people leave marriages because they’re unhappy. I mean, some do. But I think many leave because they’re uncomfortable with themselves in the mirror marriage holds up. It’s easier to start over than to face your own emotional patterns and fix what’s really broken. I dunno, I just think that marriage reflects you back to yourself? Like, if you haven’t done the inner work, it can be unbearable to face your flaws daily in the eyes of someone who sees all of it.

That’s why I turned it off. I don’t do reality shows where people make a mockery of covenant and call it “working on things.” Growth takes self-awareness, not camera time. I just see marriage as sacred, and watching people parade their dysfunction for entertainment feels disrespectful to that ideal. So, I take marriage very seriously, because it was how I was raised based on how I saw my parents treat each other. How I saw my dad treat my mom, of course I’m going to choose that in a spouse. So, to me marriage isn’t content, it’s commitment. Growth happens in private, not on camera. They were all too much, lol.

You stopped watching, CG? Lol! You’re missing some funny parts. My friend was hanging out with me this weekend… the chick I met when I was in Minneapolis in February. We watched it. She and I had some interesting talks on what we watched. How would anybody know what it’s like to be married to themselves? That doesn’t make any sense, CG.

Originally Posted by PrettyBoy

Contemplating if I want to post a youngin’ college pic of me like CG, Phroze, and AGDee did.

Post it dude! For real. Mine was from high school and I think AGDee’s was too. CG’s was a college pic. Post either one dude. C’mon, PB. I want to see if you still look the same Lol.

[PrettyBoy]

17 senior in high school

[Phrozen Sands]

Originally Posted by PrettyBoy

17 senior in high school

LMAO!!! Dude, you are shy as hell. C’mon PB, post your high school or college picture. It’s a message board, nobody GAF Lol.

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by PrettyBoy

17 senior in high school

As if we're going to believe that.