Gay Emory Student Dragged From Frat Party

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

In a perfect world, she should not have to. In an imperfect world, she should exercise caution.

There is a neighborhood near mine that is known for gang activity, drugs, prostitution, you know, all the vices. Yeah, I've got every right to be out on any street at any time of day, even in this neighborhood. Now, knowing what goes on there, would it be wise for me just to drive around because I want to? No. Nothing can stop me, but it would still be a pretty stupid idea.

And if you went there and were assaulted it wouldn't be your fucking fault.

No, being raped is not like a flood. But for obvious reasons it is a very hot button issue that really had nothing to do with the original topic of this thread. I used the flood analogy as a silly ploy to divert the conversation from a sensitive issue. I guess you missed that part. No problem....

And it was a shitty one. As pointed out by everyone else in this thread.

No, none of that is alright. I've said so previously. All I said was that a woman should use good judgment in her actions, if she can control them. Being falling down drunk at a party to me is not good judgment. She has made herself very vulnerable. Not a good idea.

BUT NOT AN INVITATION TO RAPE HER. There is zero blame on her for her rape. None. Zero. Nada. Rien.

Huh???

You complained about it being black and white. And this is. There is NO case where a woman is complicit or to blame for her own rape. None. NEVER. The responsibility is ALWAYS on the rapist. ALWAYS. Tojours.


There is no gray area. It's rape. And until you stop blaming the victim, continue to go fuck yourself.

He does not deserve all of the blame, but he did walk into a situation that did easily escalate.

Any of the blame. None. He deserves no blame.

It's like picking a fight, then getting mad 'cause you got your @$$ kicked.

Unless this person's physical presence was the legal equivalent of 'fighting words' or a physical threat, then no, it's nothing at all like picking a fight.

And say ass or don't say it all. You're grown, if ignorant.

[sigmadiva]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

And if you went there and were assaulted it wouldn't be your fucking fault.

No, but I would still be stupid for walking into a KNOWN violent area.

I'm not so naieve to think that nothing will ever happen to me anywhere. I am just as susceptible as anyone else. I think the difference between you and me is that I can recognize a dangerous situation and avoid it.

You seem to feel that nothing should happen anywhere. That is just not true. That is not real life.

And it was a shitty one. As pointed out by everyone else in this thread.

Ah, I think a few people got the humor in it.

BUT NOT AN INVITATION TO RAPE HER. There is zero blame on her for her rape. None. Zero. Nada. Rien.

I've said the same thing. But, again, use good judgment in as many situations as possible.

You complained about it being black and white.

No, I said that *your* perception is black and white.

And this is. There is NO case where a woman is complicit or to blame for her own rape. None. NEVER. The responsibility is ALWAYS on the rapist. ALWAYS. Tojours.

Again, I agree. But the woman does not have to make it a likely event, if she can prevent it. Prevention is the key. I think you keep missing that in my point.

There is no gray area. It's rape. And until you stop blaming the victim, continue to go fuck yourself.

So, for someone so adamant on this issue, you seem to enjoy saying the word 'fuck' a lot. Leaves me to wonder....

Any of the blame. None. He deserves no blame.

Well, I think 3 -4 pages ago, it was stated that given the incident, he was complicit in his own outcome. I don't think he deserves total blame. Just blame for using poor judgment.

Unless this person's physical presence was the legal equivalent of 'fighting words' or a physical threat, then no, it's nothing at all like picking a fight.

I still think the guy knew what he was doing. I don't think he was totally clueless.

And say ass or don't say it all. You're grown, if ignorant.

Oh, I can say the word. No problem. I'm just trying to respect the GC TOS.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

No, but I would still be stupid for walking into a KNOWN violent area.

I'm not so naieve to think that nothing will ever happen to me anywhere. I am just as susceptible as anyone else. I think the difference between you and me is that I can recognize a dangerous situation and avoid it.

You seem to feel that nothing should happen anywhere. That is just not true. That is not real life.

Nothing should happen anywhere. Things do happen everywhere. People who live in areas with more violent crime do not somehow deserve to be assaulted more because they're there. LOL about your assumptions about me.

Ah, I think a few people got the humor in it.

Yes, it was completely funny and not shitty at all. No wait, strike that. Reverse it.

I've said the same thing. But, again, use good judgment in as many situations as possible.

No, you've put blame on the victim. Repeatedly.

No, I said that *your* perception is black and white.

Rape is always and solely the rapist's fault.
Tell me where the gray area is, precisely.

Again, I agree. But the woman does not have to make it a likely event, if she can prevent it. Prevention is the key. I think you keep missing that in my point.

Bullshit. More women are raped by their dates, boyfriends, partners, friends then by random strangers. If you want women to really 'prevent' rape they should never leave their rooms. If you want rape to be prevented, we should start focusing on teaching people not to be fucking rapists. And stop laughing at rape jokes. And stop doubting a victim because of how she acts, dresses, who she slept with, or whether we approve of her lifestyle. It means teaching children to respect each other's bodies from a young age and not laughing off someone grabbing a waitress's ass.

I'm missing your point because your point is BLAMING THE VICTIM.

So, for someone so adamant on this issue, you seem to enjoy saying the word 'fuck' a lot. Leaves me to wonder....

What, precisely? Seriously, what exactly do you wonder?

Well, I think 3 -4 pages ago, it was stated that given the incident, he was complicit in his own outcome. I don't think he deserves total blame. Just blame for using poor judgment.

He deserves no blame for being assaulted. Assault is not a reasonable outcome for being at a party in an odd outfit. Stop blaming the victim.

I still think the guy knew what he was doing. I don't think he was totally clueless.

So he deserved it?

Oh, I can say the word. No problem. I'm just trying to respect the GC TOS.

So don't say it at all then. Or fuck off. Whichever.

[sigmadiva]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

Nothing should happen anywhere. Things do happen everywhere. People who live in areas with more violent crime do not somehow deserve to be assaulted more because they're there. LOL about your assumptions about me.

I did not say that, nor was that implied. What I said was that knowing an area that is violent, I would be stupid to go there, thinking that I don't run the risk of being assaulted.

No, you've put blame on the victim. Repeatedly.


Rape is always and solely the rapist's fault.
Tell me where the gray area is, precisely.



Bullshit. More women are raped by their dates, boyfriends, partners, friends then by random strangers. If you want women to really 'prevent' rape they should never leave their rooms. If you want rape to be prevented, we should start focusing on teaching people not to be fucking rapists. And stop laughing at rape jokes. And stop doubting a victim because of how she acts, dresses, who she slept with, or whether we approve of her lifestyle. It means teaching children to respect each other's bodies from a young age and not laughing off someone grabbing a waitress's ass.

I'm missing your point because your point is BLAMING THE VICTIM.

I want women to feel that they should not have to subject themselves to people, places, events, that they don't want to.

I want women to have high self esteem so that they don't feel that they have to get treated in a certain way.

I want women to feel empowered.

When women feel they deserve less than the best, that is ripe for abuse, of any kind.

What I am saying is that women should not have to go to such extremes just to be liked and accepted.

Women should not have to feel as if the only way they can get attention and "love" is to suffer abuse for it and put up with it.

I want women to be able to take control of their lives, and to do that is to understand their responsibility in their own actions. To recognize that they don't have to leave that option to someone else. It is their choice.

What, precisely? Seriously, what exactly do you wonder?

I wonder why do you think you have to resort to using profanity to get your point across?

He deserves no blame for being assaulted. Assault is not a reasonable outcome for being at a party in an odd outfit. Stop blaming the victim.


So he deserved it?

Go back and re-read my posts. I've answered this multiple times....

So don't say it at all then. Or fuck off. Whichever.

Again with the 'F' bomb. Color me impressed....

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

I did not say that, nor was that implied. What I said was that knowing an area that is violent, I would be stupid to go there, thinking that I don't run the risk of being assaulted.

And yet, if you were assaulted I wouldn't once think "damn, what an idiot."

I want women to feel that they should not have to subject themselves to people, places, events, that they don't want to.

I want women to have high self esteem so that they don't feel that they have to get treated in a certain way.

I want women to feel empowered.

When women feel they deserve less than the best, that is ripe for abuse, of any kind.

What I am saying is that women should not have to go to such extremes just to be liked and accepted.

Women should not have to feel as if the only way they can get attention and "love" is to suffer abuse for it and put up with it.

I want women to be able to take control of their lives, and to do that is to understand their responsibility in their own actions. To recognize that they don't have to leave that option to someone else. It is their choice.

You do not seem to grasp that rape has zero to do with their own actions.

I wonder why do you think you have to resort to using profanity to get your point across?

I don't have to. I choose to. Because people like you make it easier for rapists to get away with it.

Also, I doubt that's what you were trying to insinuate, but you got scared and backed off.

Particularly pathetic from someone who'll say ass but hide it behind symbols "because of the TOS."

Go back and re-read my posts. I've answered this multiple times....

You have, in the affirmative.

Again with the 'F' bomb. Color me impressed....

I don't care if I impress you. You're a moron who perpetuates the culture that makes rape "OK" by your insistence that it is partially the victim's fault. You are part of the problem. Not the woman who drinks too much, or the person who ends up in the wrong area of town or the guy who shows up at the party where his friends were; YOU are part of the problem. Because you're the reason the defense lawyer can ask a victim how many people she sleeps with, what she was wearing, why she was even at that party and how many drinks she had and get his client acquitted.

When I tell you to fuck off, it's not for a lack of other things to say, it's because that is the best way to express how disgusted I am with the things you're saying. So fuck off, kiss my ass, go fuck yourself, or have a blessed day but stop being part of the fucking problem.

[sigmadiva]

[QUOTE=Drolefille;1998832]

Also, I doubt that's what you were trying to insinuate, but you got scared and backed off.

You're right. It is very apparent that this is a very hot button issue for you. I'm glad that you are so adamant in your views.

The issue of a woman being raped was never the OT of this thread. It got derailed about 4 pages ago by someone, who I feel, wanted to stir the pot some more.

But to hopefully and finally address your point:

Do I feel that it is a woman's fault for being raped in any circumstance, no.

Do I feel that she can take steps in certain situations to minimize her chance of being raped, yes.

In grad school, whenever I left the lab late and had to go out to the parking lot to my car, I'd call and ask for a security escort. I didn't have to, but I did.

Whenever I was in the lab late at night working, I made sure the doors were locked if I was in the lab by myself.

I made sure that I was as secure as possible. Could something have still happened to me, probably. But, to minimize that I did all I could to prevent a negative outcome. I took responsibility for my safety whenever possible. That is all I'm saying.

Particularly pathetic from someone who'll say ass but hide it behind symbols "because of the TOS."

No, not pathetic. I just did not think using profanity really helped the discussion, considering the content of the discussion, rape.

1. I don't care if I impress you. You're a moron who perpetuates the culture that makes rape "OK" by your insistence that it is partially the victim's fault. You are part of the problem. Not the woman who drinks too much, or the person who ends up in the wrong area of town or the guy who shows up at the party where his friends were; YOU are part of the problem. Because you're the reason the defense lawyer can ask a victim how many people she sleeps with, what she was wearing, why she was even at that party and how many drinks she had and get his client acquitted.

When I tell you to fuck off, it's not for a lack of other things to say, it's because that is the best way to express how disgusted I am with the things you're saying. 2. So fuck off, kiss my ass, go fuck yourself, or have a blessed day but stop being part of the fucking problem.

To the bold 1.: I was being sarcastic

To the bold 2.: sure.....