Gay Emory Student Dragged From Frat Party

[sigmadiva]

This was a private party at a private residence - they can throw out who they want.

They way the fraternity did it, and presumably why they did it is an issue that does need to be addressed.

But, at the end of they day I think the young gay man made a bad decision to do what he did. He called attention to himself in an environment that did not call for his outfit.

And, I really hate to stereotype here, but really, the gay guy should have used common sense. Southern White, male fraternities have a history of not openly accepting gays. What did the gay student expect? To be welcomed to the party with open arms???

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

This was a private party at a private residence - they can throw out who they want.

They way the fraternity did it, and presumably why they did it is an issue that does need to be addressed.

But, at the end of they day I think the young gay man made a bad decision to do what he did. He called attention to himself in an environment that did not call for his outfit.

And, I really hate to stereotype here, but really, the gay guy should have used common sense. Southern White, male fraternities have a history of not openly accepting gays. What did the gay student expect? To be welcomed to the party with open arms???

I'm the first person to forget my manners and preach to homophobes, but I have to agree with you here. Of course, if it was solely a gay bashing, that's a different matter, but I'm doubting it was.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

I'm the first person to forget my manners and preach to homophobes, but I have to agree with you here. Of course, if it was solely a gay bashing, that's a different matter, but I'm doubting it was.

They called him a faggot after asking his orientation. That pretty much says all it needs to about their opinions on gay people.

Was he being a douche? Maybe.
Does being a douche deserve getting assaulted? No.
Should he have been kicked out? Quite probably. It's a private party.
Threatened, called a faggot for wearing a 'gay-ass hat', and then assaulted to a supposedly cheering crowd? No.

So, in short. What DrPhil said.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

They called him a faggot after asking his orientation. That pretty much says all it needs to about their opinions on gay people.

Was he being a douche? Maybe.
Does being a douche deserve getting assaulted? No.
Should he have been kicked out? Quite probably. It's a private party.
Threatened, called a faggot for wearing a 'gay-ass hat', and then assaulted to a supposedly cheering crowd? No.

So, in short. What DrPhil said.

I didn't mean to imply it's ok to kick someone's ass just because they're being annoying, but I was just saying it seems premature to assume it was a hate crime, when it seems to really be a bunch of guys getting offended and crossing the line from assholery into criminal behavior. Should they be punished? Of course, and they should be regardless of who the victim is as there was no reason to assault him.

It would be nice if they'd get over themselves and let go of obvious prejudices, but I doubt they will.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

I didn't mean to imply it's ok to kick someone's ass just because they're being annoying, but I was just saying it seems premature to assume it was a hate crime, when it seems to really be a bunch of guys getting offended and crossing the line from assholery into criminal behavior. Should they be punished? Of course, and they should be regardless of who the victim is as there was no reason to assault him.

It would be nice if they'd get over themselves and let go of obvious prejudices, but I doubt they will.

I don't believe anyone used the words "hate crime" here. You seemed to be excusing it on the grounds that it was not 'solely" a gay bashing. And blaming the victim, which is, you know, shitty.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

I don't believe anyone used the words "hate crime" here. You seemed to be excusing it on the grounds that it was not 'solely" a gay bashing. And blaming the victim, which is, you know, shitty.

Nope. I haven't even come close to implying that what they did was ok and have in very clear black and white said it wasn't. Nor have I blamed the victim for a thing. As I said in the post you quoted.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

Nope. I haven't even come close to implying that what they did was ok and have in very clear black and white said it wasn't. Nor have I blamed the victim for a thing. As I said in the post you quoted.

No, you said you didn't mean to. But what you previously said was:

I'm the first person to forget my manners and preach to homophobes, but I have to agree with you here. [That he should have used common sense] Of course, if it was solely a gay bashing, that's a different matter, but I'm doubting it was.

Where you, and sigmadiva, bordered on, if not actually crossed into blaming the victim.

Intent isn't magic, you still did it even if it was an accident.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

The way the fraternity did it, and presumably why they did it is an issue that does need to be addressed.

That's the only issue to address as far as I'm concerned. They can kick out whomever they choose but screaming homophobia makes it about more than picky fraternity men.

While this is an example of "victim" precipitation, this man's stupidity does not override the actions of the fraternity men.

And I hate it when people do this but I have to say that "common sense" is why some Black people used to not, and many still don't, attend some Southern white fraternity parties; and why some women don't go to collegiate fraternity parties at all. That was one of the big tips I was taught as a high school senior and college first year. Perceptions of common sense aside, let us not forget that these are college educated people we're talking about (some of whom are considered the upper echelon of some campuses and society once they graduate). No matter how ignorant GLOers sometimes behave, these are not thugs in an episode of Gang Wars.

[sigmadiva]

The gay guy crashed a private party looking obnoxious, which irritated the fraternity members. The fact that he is gay just added fuel to an already lit fire.

I think the gay guy showed up to make a spectacle of himself. He just got his behind beat for doing it.

Hind sight is 20/20 but the best thing the fraternity could have done is to hire private security and let the private security escort him out.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

The gay guy crashed a private party looking obnoxious, which irritated the fraternity members. The fact that he is gay just added fuel to an already lit fire.

LOL. Lime green jacket, red pants, and wizard hat is "obnoxious?" People have thin skin.

The account given in the article states that it was a recent alum who led the anti-gay expedition. Prior to the recent alum's heteromasculinity, people were simply being amused by the guy's outfit.

Private security or not, asking a person to leave does not have to include questions of sexual orientation and anti-gay comments. That's all.

[tri deezy]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

Southern White, male fraternities have a history of not openly accepting gays.

I don't disagree with the rest of your post, but I do want to point out that Emory is very different from other schools in the south. The fraternities are also nothing like what people think of when they think of "southern, white fraternities." I don't want to put down the SEC (I know that Emory isn't in the SEC, but it's an example of the southern white fraternity stereotype), but imagine a school like Alabama or Ole Miss with a chapter president sharing the same name as chapter president named in the article? Emory is a really cool place in the way it's like a little oasis in the south.

I went to a party at this very house at Emory. They don't necessarily have open parties, but they also don't usually have invite lists. We walked right in--but I suppose it was a big group of sorority girls. What kind of fraternity would turn them away? Haha

This whole story seems complicated and obviously some of the people involved acted extremely inappropriately. I feel bad for the kid involved, but I do wonder what he expected. Especially when he didn't know anybody there!

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by tri deezy

Especially when he didn't know anybody there!

He knew his friends who were at the party. The article didn't paint him as some stray who wandered off the street.