How Moms Should Treat Their Legacy Daughters

[KSUViolet06]

Isn't the "more legacies than spots" thing only REALLY an issue at a handful of more competitive schools?

I find that at most other schools, 99% of the time, the only way a girl doesn't return to her legacy chapter is if SHE drops THEM.

[ComradesTrue]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Isn't the "more legacies than spots" thing only REALLY an issue at a handful of more competitive schools?

Probably more than a handful. You have the SEC, at least 6 of the Texas schools (UT, A&M, Tech, TCU, SMU, Baylor), and likely several of the Oklahoma schools (OU, OSU, ?Tulsa).

In addition, for groups that have lots of chapters in the southeast, those particular chapters may also be experiencing this even if the entire campus panhellenic is not considered competitive. Specifically I am thinking of Phi Mu, KD, ADPi and ZTA in Georgia and South Carolina.

From a personal note, when I was at TCU in the early 90s we typically had 15-20 legacies come through rush. Last year my chapter had 60+ legacies come through. Just more moms of the 80s and sisters of the 2000s I suppose. Quota was around 40-44 while I was there and is now 50-55.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by Blondie93

In addition, for groups that have lots of chapters in the southeast, those particular chapters may also be experiencing this even if the entire campus panhellenic is not considered competitive. Specifically I am thinking of Phi Mu, KD, ADPi and ZTA in Georgia and South Carolina.

Sure. I think even in other regions, there are certain chapters at different schools who will have more legacies than others. Ex: I think many of our single letter chapters get a lot of legacies coming through just because they are older (even though their particular Panhellenics are not competitive).

Also, depending on the school, you sometimes get more sister legacies than mom-daughter coming through. Partcularly sisters whose parents were non-Greek. Maybe it's regional.

[ADqtPiMel]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Sure. I think even in other regions, there are certain chapters at different schools who will have more legacies than others. Ex: I think many of our single letter chapters get a lot of legacies coming through just because they are older (even though their particular Panhellenics are not competitive).

At Miami of Ohio (which is competitive but not, like, SEC competitive), my chapter usually had 20-25 legacies come through every year, whereas my sister's Theta chapter usually had more like 60-75 (quota usually in the 50s). So I do see some regional influence.

My mom, grandmother, great-grandmother and several aunts were all Thetas, and my mom was quite involved on a national level throughout my childhood. It was definitely expected that I wouldn't join any other sorority, and my mom never considered that they would cut me.

Theta did cut me right before pref -- they are a highly desirable chapter with a lot of legacies. My mom was totally devastated, though to her credit, she encouraged me to finish out recruitment and is very supportive of my membership in ADPi. She definitely backed off Theta involvement, though. She's just now starting advising again eight years later.

I don't have any kids, but I would have been really upset if ADPi had cut either of my younger sisters. (Luckily didn't happen...one went to pref at ADPi but ranked them second after Theta, and the other one called me after the first night of recruitment and said, "I know for certain that I want to be an ADPi.")

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by ADqtPiMel

I don't have any kids, but I would have been really upset if ADPi had cut either of my younger sisters. (Luckily didn't happen...one went to pref at ADPi but ranked them second after Theta, and the other one called me after the first night of recruitment and said, "I know for certain that I want to be an ADPi.")

Yeah, oddly enough, most of the legacy backlash/anger stories I know of involve sister legacies (maybe we aren't old enough to know many moms with kids of that age yet).

There was a girl who was a senior and officer in a chapter. We all knew that this girl's sister was coming through. If you hung out with Big Ssiter, you kind of knew that she assumed sister would get a bid. Younger sister got cut the night before Pref, but ended up joining another chapter. The fallout from the decision to cut Younger Sister was such that Big Sister terminated her membership right after recruitment (after being active and an officer for 3 years).

Two years ago, another alumna friend of mine had a little sister coming through. She was cut by her legacy house after day 2. I know this because after I got home from helping out with recruitment, I saw "XYZ at KENT STATE can F*** OFF!!!" in her FB status and twitter timeline. Several times. Big Sister deleted everything XYZ from her FB after that too. Sister ended up pledging elsewhere, but not initiating.

I have to wonder how it feels to be in a different chapter, knowing that your relative is that upset about it.

Makes me wonder how many parents are TRUTHFULLY that supportivr when their daughters end up pledging elsewhere...