Hyphenated last names

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

There may not be as much hassel in the world of licensing for DVMs as there is for MDs. If you have your maiden name on your diploma, it is a huge deal to then have your medical license in a different name or practice in a hospital under a different name.

Maybe it isn't. I really haven't looked into it, yet. Also, my friend's brother is a dentist who's married to a dentist. Same thing. She uses his last name. So, maybe it's different with MDs. *shrugs*

[AZ-AlphaXi]

Kept my maiden name when I married (25 years ago). Husband thinks its great. Son has his last name.

Husband thinks it funny when he gets called Mr. My-maiden-name and I often (espcially by son's friends) get called Mrs. His-name - although I still look for my MIL when it happens.

with so many blended families now, its not unusual for kids to not have the name of one or both parents.

[Gusteau]

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

Johnson is slang for...

Just to be clear, I've had people freak out for calling them the wrong name the very first time it happens when I have no knowledge of the situation. I know it must be irritating to have to constantly correct people, but you can't expect them to be omniscient to you nomenclature conventions. If they keep it up after you correct them feel free to go nuclear.

[ForeverRoses]

I kept my name, my husband kept his name. We've been married 10 years and it hasn't been a major issue in terms of confusion. (Our boys have his last name)

My husband was a bit confused when I told him that I didn't want to change my name, but we discussed it in pre-marriage counseling and it came down to it not being a deal-breaker for him, but it was for me. He just wanted to kids to have his name, and I was fine with that.

As far as socially, I don't really care what the invitation says- I would prefer to be called by my first name anyway, but if you want to be formal I will accept either name.

I was asked by one of my son's teachers if my son was ever confused why we didn't share a last name, and I asked if any of the kids in the room whose parents were divorced/remarried or divorced/mom takes back maiden name were confused. I figured our kids had parents that were still happily married, if all they were worried about was last names, then we did a pretty good job!

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

Explains A LOT! She needs to sit down NOW and have that discussion about expectations.

If you met her, you would be able to tell she won't. She'll still marry him. She's not very strong willed.

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by Gusteau

Johnson is slang for...

lol
How did I miss that one?

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by ForeverRoses

I kept my name, my husband kept his name. We've been married 10 years and it hasn't been a major issue in terms of confusion. (Our boys have his last name)

My husband was a bit confused when I told him that I didn't want to change my name, but we discussed it in pre-marriage counseling and it came down to it not being a deal-breaker for him, but it was for me. He just wanted to kids to have his name, and I was fine with that.

As far as socially, I don't really care what the invitation says- I would prefer to be called by my first name anyway, but if you want to be formal I will accept either name.

I was asked by one of my son's teachers if my son was ever confused why we didn't share a last name, and I asked if any of the kids in the room whose parents were divorced/remarried or divorced/mom takes back maiden name were confused. I figured our kids had parents that were still happily married, if all they were worried about was last names, then we did a pretty good job!

Good point...you guys have your priorities in check with your kids! When I was getting married, it wasn't even an issue. My husband doesn't even want his own last name since it's so bizarre! My dad who rales against femi-nazis (yeah, I grew up listening to Rush Limbaugh riding in my dad's truck) likes that I kept my maiden name. He likes having a doctor in the family! The only reason I started using my husband's name at all was that is made travel arrangements a little easier when we traveled together. My driver's license has my maiden name as my middle name so even if I by a plane ticket in my maiden name, I can get through security with my license as identification. My passport is still in my maiden name, though, which annoys my husband for some reason.

[violetpretty]

I can say for sure I will not be hyphenating my name. Logistically, it's a pain, and my last name does not sound good as the first of two hyphenated names. What happens when two hyphenated named kids get married? Do their kids have 4 last names?

Hyphenations are one of my naming pet peeves along with people whose kids go by their middle names. Schools don't know what they go by, so the first day of school, the teacher calls out Roland and everyone laughs at poor Joey. Honor your beloved relative with the embarassing name in your child's MIDDLE name.

I like my last name and I will probably keep it. However, my kids will go by my husband's last name, and I am okay with that. I have thought about changing my middle name to my mother's maiden name, since my middle name is Marie (GENERIC---like everyone else!), and I would like both sides of my heritage to be reflected in my name.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

I can say for sure I will not be hyphenating my name. Logistically, it's a pain, and my last name does not sound good as the first of two hyphenated names. What happens when two hyphenated named kids get married? Do their kids have 4 last names?

Hyphenations are one of my naming pet peeves along with people whose kids go by their middle names. Schools don't know what they go by, so the first day of school, the teacher calls out Roland and everyone laughs at poor Joey. Honor your beloved relative with the embarassing name in your child's MIDDLE name.

I like my last name and I will probably keep it. However, my kids will go by my husband's last name, and I am okay with that. I have thought about changing my middle name to my mother's maiden name, since my middle name is Marie (GENERIC---like everyone else!), and I would like both sides of my heritage to be reflected in my name.

That's a nice thought. I actually considered changing my last name to my mother's maiden name when i was a senior med student. My last name is frequently mispronounced in an embarrassing way (I don't really care anymore.) My mom's name was Dumas. I really thought about it but decided that I really didn't want to be Dr. Dumba$$ for the rest of my life since that's what kids called her growing up!

BTW, if you do it like the Spanish, you would drop your mother's name when you marry and add your husband's. Your children would have your father's name added to the end of your husband's name.

Ex. Maria Gonzalez-Prieto marries Eduardo Acosta-Rodriguez. Maria becomes Maria Gonzalez-Acosta.
Her children are Acosta-Gonzalez. I am 100% sure about the children as I have a friend who hyphenates. I am not 100% about the order that his mother's name is written. It may be Acosta-Gonzalez as well, but I think it is the way previously written. Maybe one of our latino GC-ers can help me!

[33girl]

Originally Posted by RaggedyAnn

I took Andy's last name, but was surprised when I started being referred to as First Name, Maiden Name, Last Name when volunteering with my alma mater and the sorority. It caught me off guard at first, because I was married for 3+ years and hadn't used my maiden name for anything. I now use my maiden name with my Last Name regularly in communications, but it's not my legal name anymore.

Like Calva Watson Wootton!! We learned the founders by their maiden and married names, and like agzg said, people are always referred to in sorority circles by their maiden and married names.

As someone who gets her maiden (only) last name mispronounced all the time, I AM militant about it, especially when I correct someone once and they persist in mispronouncing it. I completely sympathize with hyphenates being ticked off, because I'm sure they get the same thing AND some thinly veiled tones of voice about what they think of hyphenation.

[1stSoon2BePhD]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I'm thinking I will hyphenate just because I'm planning to get a Doctorate and I want to keep my name in there somewhere.

However, I would still answer to Mrs. Husband's name. My mom is hyphenated and still answers to Mrs. Stepdad's Lastname.

This is PRECISELY what I am doing! (and for the same reason too! I want to be "Dr. MAIDEN NAME" but "Mrs. HUSBANDS LAST NAME")

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

Hyphenations are one of my naming pet peeves along with people whose kids go by their middle names. Schools don't know what they go by, so the first day of school, the teacher calls out Roland and everyone laughs at poor Joey. Honor your beloved relative with the embarassing name in your child's MIDDLE name.

Half the people in my family go by their middle names, including one of my children. Very common in this part of the world. I don't think any of them have found it to be a major inconvenience to simply say "I go by MiddleName." Meanwhile, when my sister got married, she just stopped using her first name.

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

BTW, if you do it like the Spanish, you would drop your mother's name when you marry and add your husband's. Your children would have your father's name added to the end of your husband's name.

Or we could do it the Icelandic way. I've mentioned this at GC before, so I'll cut and paste.

In Iceland, your last name depends on your father's first name, and a family of four can have four different last names. Say dad's name is Eric -- his son, Leif, is Leif Ericsson (Eric's son), and his daughter, we'll call her Katrín, is Katrín Ericsdóttir (Eric's daughter). Meanwhile, Helga -- Eric's wife and the mother of Leif and Katrín -- is the daughter of a man named Jón, so her last name is Jónsdóttir; she doesn't change it when she gets married. Oh, and Eric's dad's first name was Stefán, so his name is Eric Stefánsson.

So, in one family, you have Eric Stefánsson (husband) and Helga Jónsdóttir (wife) and their kids: Leif Ericsson and Katrín Ericsdóttir.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Half the people in my family go by their middle names, including one of my children. Very common in this part of the world. I don't think any of them have found it to be a major inconvenience to simply say "I go by MiddleName." Meanwhile, when my sister got married, she just stopped using her first name.

Or we could do it the Icelandic way. I've mentioned this at GC before, so I'll cut and paste.

In Iceland, your last name depends on your father's first name, and a family of four can have four different last names. Say dad's name is Eric -- his son, Leif, is Leif Ericsson (Eric's son), and his daughter, we'll call her Katrín, is Katrín Ericsdóttir (Eric's daughter). Meanwhile, Helga -- Eric's wife and the mother of Leif and Katrín -- is the daughter of a man named Jón, so her last name is Jónsdóttir; she doesn't change it when she gets married. Oh, and Eric's dad's first name was Stefán, so his name is Eric Stefánsson.

So, in one family, you have Eric Stefánsson (husband) and Helga Jónsdóttir (wife) and their kids: Leif Ericsson and Katrín Ericsdóttir.

Love it! I suspect the Swedes are similar with Johanson, etc. from the Viking tradition.

[agzg]

I made a joke but then realized that I was thinking of Leif Garret.

How embarassing.

[Lil' Hannah]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Meanwhile, when my sister got married, she just stopped using her first name.

Does she just go by MaidenName HisName now?

So, in one family, you have Eric Stefánsson (husband) and Helga Jónsdóttir (wife) and their kids: Leif Ericsson and Katrín Ericsdóttir.

So mom doesn't get any recognition in this deal?