Visiting Chapters Thread

[macallan25]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

Unbelievable. EW, your fraternity is way bigger than your old-money-obsessed farce of brotherhood.

What an irrational, complete bullshit, unfounded statement. Are you kidding me? Total garbage. Pretty big talk from someone who, I'm pretty sure, has absolutely no clue who the guy is. I am sure that EW, like myself, has a very strong sense of brotherhood towards his own chapter. I am sure that his bonds with his pledge brothers and the guys who led him through pledgeship are as strong as any of ours.

You have absolutely no right to question his sense of brotherhood because he, like many of us, doesn't consider their ties to hundreds of thousands of men whom we will never know, meet, or see as strong as the individuals whom we have built friendships and bonds with that will last for the rest of our lives.

Like I said, I observe the fact that men from outside chapters are my "brothers" in the fact that we share the same rituals, oaths, etc. to our fraternity. That doesn't mean I have to treat everyone of them like my immediate family.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself. "Farce of brotherhood"........give me a f**king break.

I have no doubt that there are Sigma Kappas and Sigma Kappa chapters who are very different from my chapter and me, but I would treat every one of my sisters that I am lucky enough to meet with the utmost respect.

That's great. At what point did he or any of us say that we wouldn't treat people with respect? I said it multiple times. There is a huge difference between being respectful and courteous to someone and treating them like they've been in your life everyday since you've been in college.

Back to the original topic, if your chapter were having any guests (that wanted to stay in the house), of course you'd want a decent amount of notice. The only exception I could think of is that if a bunch from another chapter just wanted to see the house, then they shouldn't really have to give much if any notice.

Yes they should. We don't know these people. They could walk in side and shoot someone for all I know.

I'm not sure what kind of "different" you are talking about, whether it's just that this chapter is "low tier"/not Southern or if you anticipate these guys will trash your house/cause some sort of risk management issue. If it's the former, they're your brothers, and you really ought to be a gracious host because there is no good reason you shouldn't. If it's the latter, offer them a tour of the house, and maybe go somewhere else with them (i.e. don't drink in the house, don't offer to let them stay overnight in the house) but be polite.

ETA: Now I see what kind of "different" you are referring to. If you are so different, why do they want to hang out with your chapter?

How is he supposed to know answer this? Probably because they are in the same fraternity and know that they can't go to any other houses? I mean, is that not right?

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by macallan25

Like I said, I observe the fact that men from outside chapters are my "brothers" in the fact that we share the same rituals, oaths, etc. to our fraternity. That doesn't mean I have to treat everyone of them like my immediate family.

Slight hi-jack

I'm curious about this statement. Pretty much every Greek I've encountered IRL recognizes both chapter and national brothers/sisters as more than just "the people who know the same oath as me." Only on GC have I found people pledging their allegiance to the chapter (as opposed to the national organization). Of course, it's obvious that you'd be closer to your chapter members, but I can't imagine treating other brothers differently from chapter brothers.

Is this a common mentality? And why join a national organization if you didn't want the "national brotherhood?"

(Please don't take this as an attack -- just curious about this. Not saying one way is wrong or right, just different)

/hi-jack

[macallan25]

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

Slight hi-jack

I'm curious about this statement. Pretty much every Greek I've encountered IRL recognizes both chapter and national brothers/sisters as more than just "the people who know the same oath as me." Only on GC have I found people pledging their allegiance to the chapter (as opposed to the national organization). Of course, it's obvious that you'd be closer to your chapter members, but I can't imagine treating other brothers differently from chapter brothers.

I'm not sure what else I am supposed to view them as? Yes, they are in my fraternity. They took the same oaths, went through the same rituals....many went through pledgeship and came out unscathed......and I commend them for that. I will treat them all with the same respect and courtesy I would anyone, unless they act in a manner that doesn't deserve it. But as far as viewing them in the same light as guys who I am personally involved with every day, guys who know my family, have been to relatives funerals, have keys to my home, go on trips with us.....I'm sorry.....I can't open my life up to a guy whom I don't know at the drop of a hat and treat them like I've known them for a long period of time.

That is what I think of when I read "treating them differently". It's not like I'm going to treat them as less of a person because they aren't a member of my chapter, haha.

Is this a common mentality? And why join a national organization if you didn't want the "national brotherhood?"

(Please don't take this as an attack -- just curious about this. Not saying one way is wrong or right, just different)

/hi-jack

I think it's very common.

I've never said I don't observe a "national brotherhood" with guys from all over the country. It's just much stronger towards the guys in my chapter. I think that is perfectly reasonable.

Also, I'm not taking it as an attack. I am just shocked at some of the ludicrous statements that have been made......insulting and demeaning statements.

Reading a response from someone in which she claims a "farce" of brotherhood and attacks a man's chapter with the preconceived notion that he and his brothers wouldn't accept individuals from other schools because they are not "old money" and may have less personal wealth is insulting.....and it's rude.

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by macallan25

What an irrational, complete bullshit, unfounded statement. Are you kidding me? Total garbage. Pretty big talk from someone who, I'm pretty sure, has absolutely no clue who the guy is. I am sure that EW, like myself, has a very strong sense of brotherhood towards his own chapter. I am sure that his bonds with his pledge brothers and the guys who led him through pledgeship are as strong as any of ours.

You have absolutely no right to question his sense of brotherhood because he, like many of us, doesn't consider their ties to hundreds of thousands of men whom we will never know, meet, or see as strong as the individuals whom we have built friendships and bonds with that will last for the rest of our lives.

Like I said, I observe the fact that men from outside chapters are my "brothers" in the fact that we share the same rituals, oaths, etc. to our fraternity. That doesn't mean I have to treat everyone of them like my immediate family.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself. "Farce of brotherhood"........give me a f**king break.

Sorry, I just can't fathom how a group of men could understand what it means to be brothers in a national fraternity when a basis for membership is the amount of money a potential member is perceived to have. I interpreted EW's comment as him thinking his chapter was superior to other chapters of his fraternity.

Originally Posted by macallan25

That's great. At what point did he or any of us say that we wouldn't treat people with respect? I said it multiple times. There is a huge difference between being respectful and courteous to someone and treating them like they've been in your life everyday since you've been in college.

Of course you'll be closer with members of your chapter +/- 3 years from you, but again, I interpreted EW as thinking his chapter is superior to the (inter)national fraternity or that his loyalty is only to his chapter and not his (inter)national fraternity.

Originally Posted by macallan25

Yes they should. We don't know these people. They could walk in side and shoot someone for all I know.

Ok, I suppose this COULD happen, but whether they just walked in or gave you a month's notice wouldn't really matter if that were an individual/group's intent? I wouldn't lose sleep over worrying that my sisters from another chapter would come to my house and shoot sisters from my chapter.

Originally Posted by macallan25

How is he supposed to know answer this? Probably because they are in the same fraternity and know that they can't go to any other houses? I mean, is that not right?

Just asking for him to speculate if he has any ideas. If the other chapter comes back, they must find something they enjoy about hanging out with SEC's chapter.

[macallan25]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

Sorry, I just can't fathom how a group of men could understand what it means to be brothers in a national fraternity when a basis for membership is the amount of money a potential member is perceived to have. I interpreted EW's comment as him thinking his chapter was superior to other chapters of his fraternity.

Can you point me in the direction of where ElephantWalk made any kind of statement that comes even remotely within the realm of what you just said? I haven't seen it.

Your interpretation was wrong. I'm sorry. I don't really even care if it's an opinion....it just isn't right.

Of course you'll be closer with members of your chapter +/- 3 years from you, but again, I interpreted EW as thinking his chapter is superior to the (inter)national fraternity or that his loyalty is only to his chapter and not his (inter)national fraternity.

I didn't gather that from his statements. What I gathered from it was that he is pretty cautious towards complete strangers who happen to be in his same fraternity that come by his house and visit. Obviously he has had some experience with some out of town members who acted like complete, classless trash.

I'm pretty sure he stated plain as day that he has had visiting members at his house during game days.......and had an absolute blast. But I guess that really means he hated them all and didn't think they were good enough for him and his chapter brothers because they don't have as much money as all of them.

Ok, I suppose this COULD happen, but whether they just walked in or gave you a month's notice wouldn't really matter if that were an individual/group's intent? I wouldn't lose sleep over worrying that my sisters from another chapter would come to my house and shoot sisters from my chapter.

That's your prerogative. I, on the other hand, feel a responsibility towards my chapter to observe some discretion when dealing with a group of, once again, complete strangers.

Just asking for him to speculate if he has any ideas. If the other chapter comes back, they must find something they enjoy about hanging out with SEC's chapter.

That would make sense.