|
» GC Stats |
Members: 330,969
Threads: 115,704
Posts: 2,207,356
|
| Welcome to our newest member, Scotterupt |
|
 |
|
07-17-2007, 10:48 PM
|
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: In my bed...I'm on summer vacation
Posts: 189
|
|
Marquise, this is a good question. I will just say that my husband and I (who IS a Nupe) have been friends for many years. When we were done with our "single" ways and ready to be serious we did the damn thing and got married. I have always known that he was my sole mate but I was not always willing to accept the idea. I had to grow as a woman and he as a man for us to make a serious commitment. You have to take your time and be sure because marriage is serious. We both realized that and that was that. On another note, we have a lot of friends that are married and that is pretty much who we surround ourselves with because those are the people whom we have things in common.
We have fun together and apart. We know our roles and we respect each other's individuality because it is important to remember who you are.
Aside from popular belief, marriage can be fun. It is work but it is also well worth it when you have someone who you KNOW for a fact has your back. I love being married...plus my hubby is "fine as hell" so you know that can't hurt either. 
__________________
DST/LVAC
OES/PHA~IL
"Like the perfect lyrics over the tightest beat"
Last edited by Live_Wire17; 07-17-2007 at 10:51 PM.
Reason: forgot something
|
07-18-2007, 02:12 AM
|
|
Super Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: On the beach. Well....not really but near it. :0)
Posts: 13,574
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dionysus
This some bull, I finna go lesbian....all the way.
|
LOL!
__________________
Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. ** Greater Service, Greater Progress Since 1922
|
07-18-2007, 08:40 AM
|
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: La vie boheme
Posts: 1,360
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dionysus
This some bull, I finna go lesbian....all the way.
|
the same power struggle exist in ALL relationships regardless of orientation...
__________________
...and yet I rise from crushed dreams and broken promises, armed with self love, self preservation and self balance to achieve the impossible... learning to be ME... ©
ZΦB
|
07-23-2007, 12:11 PM
|
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Trying to stay away form that APOrgy! :eek:
Posts: 8,072
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by neosoul
the same power struggle exist in ALL relationships regardless of orientation...
|
Hahaha...I was joking. I like read somewhere that domestic violence happens the most in les relationships, followed by gay, and then straight relationships. Something about women not being socialized as much as men, not to hit their partners.
This thread is still going on. 
|
07-18-2007, 10:40 AM
|
|
Banned
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 396
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dionysus
This some bull, I finna go lesbian....all the way.
|
You lint licker!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEJJUGJZxpU
Anyhow, I think a lot of people are single because they want relationships to be a walk in the park when in fact they are not. They don't want any struggle, hardships, or trials and tribulations, which I feel makes relationships stronger. People don't want to get their feelings hurt, and they probably feel better off just being single. Therefore, when something goes wrong, they are not obligated to stay. Every time I start to get to know someone, something just ain't right. There are things I can accommodate to, but I will never settle and stray away from my standards. Frankly, I'm tired of dating. However, I must go on and find my soulmate. As soon as you think you have the perfect man, you find out the a$$hole is a crackhead. WTF am I supposed to do? Watch him snort his life away? Oh sh!t, I think I just took this to a personal level. 
|
07-18-2007, 02:49 AM
|
|
Super Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: On the beach. Well....not really but near it. :0)
Posts: 13,574
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by 357Nupe
I find it funny that people want to add God and remove God as they feel it necessary  . I never said roles according to the bible, you assumed and you know what you do when you a$$ u not me. The roles I am referring to are natural and of course that generally agrees with the bible since it is the essence of nature. |
Natural to you. Not me 
Quote:
|
Why do you find it hard to give up control?
|
Because I don't have to And neither should he.
Quote:
|
Your problem is not with marriage, men or religion, it is with some words that you have given control of your life. My wife give me control but with the gift she gave me I returned the gift of control to her. I am the head of my house but only because my wife allows it, she still does everything she wants and never ask for permission. Hell I ask to go out, she leaves and calls back to say I will be in later, bossy a$$ AKA's.
|
My idea of marriage is not the same as yours (obviously) To me, it's not about control but being equal to each other. No one controls me but me. No problem.
Quote:
|
Your assumption is based on perception and yours my dear is flawed. Roles are a part of life when you got your job you got a role, when your were born into your family you got a role, what makes you think that stops when you get married. I hope that when your mate finds you he uses the right words for your sake.
|
Flawed by whose standard? I agree roles are a part of life, some born into, some given, some by choice. My life, truly about choices. At the root of it all, I chose not to be married right now.
Quote:
|
As for you hurting a mans ego, maybe you confused a boy for a man. You can hurt a mans feelings and physical body but his ego should be Diamond encrusted.
|
Maybe I did and maybe I didn't, I still hurt their feelings.
Why are you guys getting so puffed up? 357Nupe, you're married so what difference does it make for you?
__________________
Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. ** Greater Service, Greater Progress Since 1922
Last edited by NinjaPoodle; 07-18-2007 at 03:03 AM.
|
07-18-2007, 08:38 AM
|
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 37
|
|
Flawed by whose standard? I agree roles are a part of life, some born into, some given, some by choice. My life, truly about choices. At the root of it all, I chose not to be married right now.
I can respect your choice.
Maybe I did and maybe I didn't, I still hurt their feelings.
Why are you guys getting so puffed up? 357Nupe, you're married so what difference does it make for you?[/quote]
Maybe your choices are just finding you the wrong man(boy) but from what I have read in this thread when the right MAN finds you, all your control, and 50/50 stuff will not matter you two will compliment each other to the point that the struggle for power will end and the one mindedness of love will set in and you will find yourself in the role you and your husband agree is best for the your family. (Damn I think I just said something deep but I could be wrong, nope my wife said that was a good one)
No one is getting puffed up, I thought we were having a disscusion  , which involves a back and forth exchange of ideas. But if someone is getting puffed up, maybe this will prove to some women that men are not just looking for sex, but we also have a depth of emotions that women might want to tap into.
Also it makes a difference to me because what we are talking about is how relationships are affecting black people and weather married or single that is something that I will always chime in on.
|
07-19-2007, 02:01 AM
|
|
Super Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: On the beach. Well....not really but near it. :0)
Posts: 13,574
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by 357Nupe
Maybe your choices are just finding you the wrong man(boy) but from what I have read in this thread when the right MAN finds you, all your control, and 50/50 stuff will not matter you two will compliment each other to the point that the struggle for power will end and the one mindedness of love will set in and you will find yourself in the role you and your husband agree is best for the your family. (Damn I think I just said something deep but I could be wrong, nope my wife said that was a good one)
|
Nope, I'm going to find him. All of my other relationships were the result of him finding me. I need to find what I consider acceptable. But everything else, yes sort of, because there will not be a struggle for power. I don't subscribe to that.
Quote:
|
No one is getting puffed up, I thought we were having a disscusion, which involves a back and forth exchange of ideas. But if someone is getting puffed up, maybe this will prove to some women that men are not just looking for sex, but we also have a depth of emotions that women might want to tap into.
|
It's hard to tap into it when guys put on a front.
Quote:
|
Also it makes a difference to me because what we are talking about is how relationships are affecting black people and weather married or single that is something that I will always chime in on.
|
You are right, I respect that.
__________________
Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. ** Greater Service, Greater Progress Since 1922
|
07-20-2007, 01:52 AM
|
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Twin Cities
Posts: 6,751
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by NinjaPoodle
Nope, I'm going to find him. All of my other relationships were the result of him finding me. I need to find what I consider acceptable. But everything else, yes sort of, because there will not be a struggle for power. I don't subscribe to that.
It's hard to tap into it when guys put on a front.
You are right, I respect that. |
Dayuuuuuuuum! NinjaPoodle said she's gonna find her a joker.
Last edited by PrettyBoy; 01-12-2008 at 05:42 AM.
|
07-19-2007, 08:36 AM
|
|
GreekChat Member
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: The Matrix
Posts: 4,424
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by 357Nupe
Maybe your choices are just finding you the wrong man(boy) but from what I have read in this thread when the right MAN finds you, all your control, and 50/50 stuff will not matter you two will compliment each other to the point that the struggle for power will end and the one mindedness of love will set in and you will find yourself in the role you and your husband agree is best for the your family. (Damn I think I just said something deep but I could be wrong, nope my wife said that was a good one)
|
Your wife is right.  Very well said.
__________________
Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc.
It's a jungle out there.
|
|
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
|
Hybrid Mode
