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Sorry. I got my signals crossed. I understood the reason that the half of the conversation was missing. I mentioned it in the post, so I thought you meant something else in addition.
I'm afraid that some legacies at the really big recruitments with a bunch of legacies going through DO get cut for reasons as superficial as anyone. I'd love it to be different, but I'm afraid that's the deal. Since you can't keep them all, there's a license to be pretty cavalier about the whole thing. You've got your ticket to second round, but that's it. And maybe that's like it ought to be, I don't know.
I suspect you are right in the particular case we were talking about because of the mother's involvement at that chapter and they wouldn't have written it off so easily, but I'll be honest, I'd be like that mom. At the point I've worked for a chapter for years, and I send my (seemingly well qualified) kid through rush and you cut here, I'm probably done with you. Your rejection of my (hypothetical) kid is going to be taken pretty personally. It's not the whole because she's my little (hypothetical) perfect snowflake, but because she's my (hypothetical) flesh and blood and you cut her.
I don't think I feel that way if I knew her GPA was way lower than average or that she didn't have involvement and leadership or any of the factors that are built in to consider. And if she was borderline autistic or freakishly shy, I think I'd know that too and understand that might get her cut too.
But "fit" isn't going to get it done as a good explanation. I've, as have we all, watched 18-22 year old women choose their social groups and the reasons that they use are not always good ones. I accept that membership is in the hands of the undergraduate chapter, but that doesn't mean I believe they are going to make good decisions all the time. And at the point I have direct personal experience with a group at a chapter making jerky decisions, I'm not going to keep working for them, assuming that I had been.
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