Depression (the disease, not the economy)

[I.A.S.K.]

Originally Posted by libramunoz

Girl, do I need to spell it out?
Let it go and just move on. I don't have a problem in moving on hell I'd like to but don't act like you just can't let it G-O.
But just realize that I didn't see you pushing me either.

Please let this go. Its really extra and unnecessary. It seems that you also have a problem moving on. No disrespect is intended, but all this extraness is grossly counterproductive to the reasons you've given for sharing in this thread in the first place.

AKAMonet, Dr.Phil and Libramunoz thanks for answering my question.

[libramunoz]

Shit Monet, get off the crack!

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by libramunoz

What kind of torture did you need to see from me? What?
Hell, here it is for you, for 6 months, I was depressed as hell. I hated my job, couldn't concentrate from it, couldn't think clearly, and one day, I wanted to kill my damn self!
I was sitting on the bed, thinking about getting out the shotgun, putting in the bullets, and blowing out my Goddamned brain!
Is that what you wanted/needed to see?
Thank YOU JESUS that HE came into my room and made me think about the effect that I would leave. How I would hurt my mother, how I would hurt my grandparents (3 of which were deceased), how I would hurt my siblings.
HE made me see that if we were struggling to keep afloat on the farm that killing myself would make things worse because of the fact that who was about to bury my big ass?
My mother had just lost her father, 16 months before, she'd just lost her oldest sister, and in 2005, she lost her brother. My brother is mentally gone and physically a fool! God made my crazy ASS THINK of the consequences to my just about to be dumb ass actions!
Shit Monet, is this what you wanted to see? Is this the torture that you needed? Goddamn!

Originally Posted by libramunoz

Shit Monet, get off the crack!

I was not pointing out your torture... I was pointing out my own torture...

Since you chose to post your angst on GC, which is not recommended, I would highly recommend coming to the "Isle" where others, some from GC, can find sanctuary.

PM me if you want a Travel Visa. There is a cost associated due to the security and protect of comments for the best practices badges.

[libramunoz]

You gotta learn when to let shit go!
When people are telling you, in a nice way, LEAVE IT ALONE--quit being that kid that keeps giving the other kid a wet willy!
Then you sit back and wonder why, bam, you got knocked the fuck out!
When folks are telling you STOP, think, STOP typing, and THINK why they are telling you to stop!
It's because they're about to knock the shit fire fuck outta you!

[libramunoz]

Iask, I do understand what you're saying and I am willing to let it go!

[libramunoz]

Monet, girl, you are cracking me up! Seriously!
I have my own "world" where I sit back, have a Pepsi, and smoke a cigarette. I like it in there, they know me!
Like I said, I misread what you had written and I apologize for misreading, but like you, I too am human.
Monet, we all have flaws, and as a person, you just have to learn to accept your flaws for who you are, good and bad. I've had to learn how to do that in my life. I am the type of person who doesn't care what others say or think about her. Never have and never will.
People think I'm nuts in general. But I know that people also think I'm sweet, kind, and is the one person that if you call at 2am needing a friend to talk to or to come see you, get you, I will be there before you can finish that box of kleenex you're going through.
One of my little cousins (she's 24) and I have a joke going on between us. When she was in college any time she called late at night, I'd automatically ask her, "do you need me to come, is it a guy I need to bring the gun for?, are you pg?" She'd always have to reassure me that it wasn't any of those things to keep me from going to where she was. When she was having recent bf problems, she knew that I was the last one she wanted to call because she knew those same three questions would be asked, and if she said yes to any of them, I'd be up there quick, fast, and in a hurry!

The point is, I'm like that with any of my friends and family, and you if you'd need it! But there are times when we just have to learn how to agree to disagree.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by libramunoz

Monet, girl, you are cracking me up! Seriously!
I have my own "world" where I sit back, have a Pepsi, and smoke a cigarette. I like it in there, they know me!
Like I said, I misread what you had written and I apologize for misreading, but like you, I too am human.
Monet, we all have flaws, and as a person, you just have to learn to accept your flaws for who you are, good and bad. I've had to learn how to do that in my life. I am the type of person who doesn't care what others say or think about her. Never have and never will.
People think I'm nuts in general. But I know that people also think I'm sweet, kind, and is the one person that if you call at 2am needing a friend to talk to or to come see you, get you, I will be there before you can finish that box of kleenex you're going through.
One of my little cousins (she's 24) and I have a joke going on between us. When she was in college any time she called late at night, I'd automatically ask her, "do you need me to come, is it a guy I need to bring the gun for?, are you pg?" She'd always have to reassure me that it wasn't any of those things to keep me from going to where she was. When she was having recent bf problems, she knew that I was the last one she wanted to call because she knew those same three questions would be asked, and if she said yes to any of them, I'd be up there quick, fast, and in a hurry!

The point is, I'm like that with any of my friends and family, and you if you'd need it! But there are times when we just have to learn how to agree to disagree.

You should see our "VENT Area"... We lose our minds there.

But we really have started to find our healing space. We are truly an "Isle in a Torrential Ocean of Cyberspace", a place of refuge, a sanctuary... And there is buffered support with professionally licensed people...

People who do not understand may say things, but the participants are like, "WOW, I am glad I am here!"

Just know, you are not ALONE in your pain...

The passport travel visa reservation open when you are ready...

[libramunoz]

Girl, my mind is fine-the body-that's another thing.

Girl I am a professional in my area that's why I do know and understand about mental health issues/problems.

Child, I'm not in any pain, I'm just fine. I've learned a saying in church that I have to remind myself of many times, take it to the alter and leave it there--don't bring it back to the pew with you!

Like I said, the people in my world know me and I'm o.k. in that pink bubble at times--it keeps me and others safe.

Just know that you are finding yourself going through that box of kleenex, I'm here anytime you'd need. Not as a professional, just as a friend.

[Senusret I]

So we allow spam now?

[RU OX Alum]

Originally Posted by HotDamnImAPhiMu

Is anyone else here dealing with Major Depressive Disorder? Are you being treated by your primary care physician or a psychiatrist? How long as your depression lasted? What drugs are you taking for it? Have you ever been hospitalized for depression? What are the side effects? Are you also doing a form of talk therapy?

I've been dealing with depression for a year and nine months. It was a side effect of the Depo Provera (birth control) shot, and it just snowballed out of control.

I started off with my primary care physician, but when it became obvious that I wasn't responding to several drugs the doc suggested I move on to a psychiatrist. I like her a lot; I feel like she really listens and acts on what I have to say. If I tell her a drug isn't working for me or the side effects are too bad to handle, she switches me to something else right away. No patting me on the head and telling me "we'll just wait another three weeks and see how you're doing then, hmm?"

I take Wellbutrin, Prozac, and Lithium. The combo seems to be working pretty well. The worst side effect is fine hand tremor (my hands shake). It drives me nuts. My handwriting is awful and I drop stuff all the time. Putting on mascara in the morning is an adventure. But I keep taking it because the shakes are better than those days when I couldn't get out of bed or eat.

I do go to talk therapy. I didn't want to go - it's pointless, I thought, since I don't have any big time problems in my life that would warrant counseling - but the more research I did the more I saw that patients who were treated with drugs AND talk therapy did much, much better than patients who were treated with one or the other. And boy did I want to get better.

I'm doing much better these days, although I'm still waiting for the go-ahead from the doc and the therapist for me to return to work. Makes for plenty of time to post on GC, though.

Hey

I'm still being treated for manic depression (bipolar affective disorder type I, early onset, well documented, extreme case [the parenthetical is from notes by an old doctor of mine)

I go to therapy and am taking medicine.

I hope you're doing okay.

[HotDamnImAPhiMu]

Thanks! I hope you're hanging in there, too. Although it sounds like you have things pretty well stabilized.

I have a friend whose son started showing symptoms of bipolar type I at seven. At first I didn't believe her and I thought she was probably overmedicating her kid, but then one day I saw him when he hadn't taken his Lithium in awhile.... omg. It was like he was a completely different kid. I couldn't believe one little boy could change so much in such a short period of time.

[libramunoz]

Sometimes when you see someone without taking their medications, you will see a completely different person.
For years, I have an aunt that is Schizophrenic. When she didn't take her meds, OMG, the voices she'd hear, the things she'd do, wow wee! But when she'd take her meds, she was as normal as she could be for her.
For some the meds seem to work very effectively, for others it doesn't. I think it depends on the person that you are and the person you know you want/can be.
I think it's the mindset that you are willing to put yourself in to help in determining how effective the medication can/will be.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

You can't "tell" me anything just as I can't "tell" you to subscribe to (or even understand the different applications of, based on your post) the "deviance" approach to mental health. More than that, you are still missing what I am saying so I wasted my time in explaining it.

Suffice it to say, 99% of what you posted is based on faulty assumptions and delusions of grandeur. You aren't the only one with professional experience and opinions in this thread.

I called you an idiot for the same reason you're going on a tangent about arrogance and usernames right now. You think it applies. I sometimes read your posts and wonder if you're in the same discussion that everyone else is.

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Seriously, and I'm being serious, I did not mean to prompt a breakdown on your part, AKA Monet.

The who, what, where, what, and why of discussions of mental health are components of the aforementioned myths, fears, cultural competencies, ignorances, etc. I never said this stuff was in isolation. For the purposes of this discussion, I was simply talking about the discussion of such matters and the different ways it can impact seeking treatment. I am not sure where you were going with that because you had a few ideas that steered from my point--and that's how dialogue between you and me often goes.

@the bolded. Those are trigger words and phrases. Who can effectively communicate when you are calling people names and putting them people down? Why would I want to defend myself against those comments? So what? Will people think of me any differently or like me more (or less)? No. So, you are entitled to YOUR opinion, but that is a wholly inaccurate description of me. You can disagree with my opinions, that is fine... But belittling because you choose not to understand them, is your choice. I can be crystal clear as water from the tap, you will still use trigger words and phrases against me belittling me publicly--for what reason, IDK? I guess you get your rocks off about it, I guess I make you day to triumph over me... IDK? But I don't have to belittle others when I want to feel better about myself... I guess that is the difference between you and me?

Now I can use all kinds of profane language with epithets... But, what's the point? That is why it is better to avoid each other, because I cannot see the helping or healing here? People will do whatever they want to do, ultimately, even after pointing out the error of their ways...

@the underlined. Yes, I knew that was your point. You assume that I missed that. I did not. I thought my posts reflected what you were saying. Apparently, you did not think so. You would know that if you did not try so hard to dismiss and discredit me. But, that's fine... I understand you have to find someone to scapegoat...