More Men are Marrying Wealthier Women

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by Schmidtty

Yeah, I would agree, but the thing about black women (in general), they don't really date outside of their race. Some do, but most don't.

Newsflash: Most PEOPLE only date intraracially and intraculturally. That goes for most people in America and people in most countries (although they tend to call it something other than "race" and instead use the various correlates of "race").

However, Asian women have the highest rate of interracial marriage whereas white women are only slightly higher than Black women. This has to do with not only opinions of interracial dating, but also the availability of intra- and interracial dating and marriage options for particular socioeconomic brackets.

White women of a higher socioeconomic status who date interracially are more likely to get the similarly situated Black men who choose to date white women. This combined with other factors (i.e. lower education level of Black men compared to Black women) is what leads misguided Black women to cry "there are no good Black men." This is misguided for the reasons I stated in my first post. Some of us have never had a problem with finding well-educated Black men with high incomes and everything else that we want in a mate.

It's a damn shame that Black women are urged to date interracially when single white women who are searching for a mate are rarely overtly and covertly urged to do so. "The good white men are out there......."

[DaemonSeid]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

It's a damn shame that Black women are urged to date interracially when single white women who are searching for a mate are rarely overtly and covertly urged to do so. "The good white men are out there......."

Turn on the news....LOL

[agzg]

I have more "education" than live-in but he's the breadwinner in our household. I'm alright with that as long as I feel like I'm contributing something.

[cheerfulgreek]

More women are graduating from college and pursuing higher degrees than men are too. I was watching something about it last night.

[DaemonSeid]

So the fry guy at McDonalds doesn't have a chance, huh?

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

So the fry guy at McDonalds doesn't have a chance, huh?

lol
Nope--or the guy at Scrubway or Taco Hell. (I'm kidding)

[starang21]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

So the fry guy at McDonalds doesn't have a chance, huh?

neither would the fry girl.

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by starang21

neither would the fry girl.

lol lol

[DaemonSeid]

That's discrimination.

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

That's discrimination.

Would you go out with a woman who didn't have any ambition?

[DaemonSeid]

hell. no.

But seriously, reading the article and reading you ladies' responses, I am inclined to agree. Women fought long and hard to 'be equal' to men so now that a lot are achieving this, then the next thing one would have to do is get used to the idea of possibly marrying someone that may not be on the same footing with them financially, the question for men still is can we swallow our pride and deal with a woman who does make more than we do?

I would say that IMO at the end of the day, if the bills are paid and we are struggling, what difference does it make?

We aren't living in the same world where at one time the man was the breadwinner (hunter gatherer) and the women stayed at home. it's enough trying to get along on your own let alone someone else so we all have to adjust to the roles that we take up in our relationships and focus on what else makes it work besides finance.

At the same time let's not equate making more money with taking care of someone else. Regardless of who makes more, BOTH still need to be bringing in a steady income.

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

hell. no.

But seriously, reading the article and reading you ladies' responses, I am inclined to agree. Women fought long and hard to 'be equal' to men so now that a lot are achieving this, then the next thing one would have to do is get used to the idea of possibly marrying someone that may not be on the same footing with them financially, the question for men still is can we swallow our pride and deal with a woman who does make more than we do?

I would say that IMO at the end of the day, if the bills are paid and we are struggling, what difference does it make?

We aren't living in the same world where at one time the man was the breadwinner (hunter gatherer) and the women stayed at home. it's enough trying to get along on your own let alone someone else so we all have to adjust to the roles that we take up in our relationships and focus on what else makes it work besides finance.

At the same time let's not equate making more money with taking care of someone else. Regardless of who makes more, BOTH still need to be bringing in a steady income.

Yep. And I'm not talking fast food either. I hardly call throwing a few cold cuts on a sandwich for $5 bucks an hour (or whatever minimum wage is) "a steady income".

eta: as long as there's some kind of ambition. Seriously. Finances are one of the main causes of divorce. I'm just being realistic.

[DrPhil]

Oh and I was teasing when I said "people like cheerfulgreek...."

But, in all honestly, I see what cheerfulgreek is saying (assuming she wasn't trying to condescend those who work in these jobs) because low wage labor where there is no promise of longevity is not a steady income. It is an honest income that works for as long as you are blessed to have the income.

Other than that, God bless those who have honest jobs even if they have to work 2-3 jobs to get those unsteady incomes. I consider that a last resort but it is a first resort for many. God bless us all.

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

Yep. And I'm not talking fast food either. I hardly call throwing a few cold cuts on a sandwich for $5 bucks an hour (or whatever minimum wage is) "a steady income".

eta: as long as there's some kind of ambition. Seriously. Finances are one of the main causes of divorce. I'm just being realistic.

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Oh and I was teasing when I said "people like cheerfulgreek...."

But, in all honestly, I see what cheerfulgreek is saying (assuming she wasn't trying to condescend those who work in these jobs) because low wage labor where there is no promise of longevity is not a steady income. It is an honest income that works for as long as you are blessed to have the income.

Other than that, God bless those who have honest jobs even if they have to work 2-3 jobs to get those unsteady incomes. I consider that a last resort but it is a first resort for many. God bless us all.

THIS.

And I don't want anyone to think I'm a gold digger or anything like that, because I'm not. I wasn't trying to be condescending at all, it's just that a guy without some kind of ambition to me is lazy. I hate lazy people. Seriously. I mean, at least make enough money to be able to support yourself. Working at McDonalds, Scrubway, Taco Hell, etc. etc. alone is not going to pay the bills and it definitely will not provide for a family. When I get married and he gets laid off or something and has to work two or three jobs, then I'm o.k. with that, but I would hope that he's tryng to do something to get back on his feet. I'm just trying to be realistic, that's all I'm doing. A lot of people say they would be o.k. with people doing this or someone doing that in a marriage, but really, when the responsibility sets in, then what? I'm sorry, but if I met a guy and he said he worked at McDonalds, I'm going to ask "doing what?" and if he's my age or in his 30s and he's a "french fry engineer" or whatever the title is now, or he's not in school, or trying to work his way up the ladder at McDonald's then I'm going to wonder why is this guy who's in my age group, not in school, or not doing anything else to try and better himself? If he's a nice guy then he can be nice for some other girl. I guess I'll miss out on a sweet, genuine guy. I seriously would rather be single. However, I don't mind if he's making less than me, I really don't, as long as I feel financially secure with him. When I'm all done with school and everything else that I plan on doing, he probably will be making less than me, and that's o.k. but I'm not going to take care of kids and an adult guy who works fast food jobs. Sorry.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

Working at McDonalds, Scrubway, Taco Hell, etc. etc. alone is not going to pay the bills

Depends on what kind of bills said person has. And what position he has.