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Originally Posted by tapuz
So all of the rho gammas told me to rush again in the fall, as thats how many of their sisters got into sororities they didn't get into in the spring. Although rush is fairly competitive at my school, Greeks are only 5% of it and it's not taken as seriously as it is in other universities. I messaged the sorority presidents thanking them for the honor of being invited to their pref night and that I just wasn't ready to make a commitment so quickly. They all encouraged me to come out again in the fall, you can't say that means nothing.
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The Rho Gammas told you to rush again in the fall: Keep in mind, they probably say this to every girl who didn't receive a bid. And while that may have been how some sisters got into sororities in the fall, that doesn't mean they were invited to their top choice, and that doesn't mean that some of the girls who were told to rush again ended up bidless once more.
You messaged the presidents, and they responded by telling you to rush again in the fall: Read above. Also, since you messaged them (and possibly never met them during recruitment), they might not even remember/know who you are. Or maybe they do, and they're just trying to be nice. I mean, what response would you expect? "No, you shouldn't come back out for recruitment. You'll never get a bid." That's not likely to happen.. anywhere.
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In terms of trying again with my top choice, I understand that the chances aren't very high, but as fewer people rush in the fall, and the fact that I've already started getting in touch with a couple of the sisters I really connected with at rush, I'm going to do my best to genuinely get to know people in the chapter, as well as in the other chapters.
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Fewer people rush in the fall, but fewer bids are also given out. And maybe your top choice won't be recruiting at all in the fall. I don't know how things work at your school and if any chapters are near/above total, but if they already have too many members, they won't be able to take on more.
You should always try to genuinely get to know sorority members, but don't set yourself up for disappointment. Keep in mind that you could meet members of your top choice, have a great semester, and get a bid in the fall. But you could also get to know them more, have a great time, get attached, and then not receive a bid, which would probably be more heart-breaking than not receiving one during formal.
Just be realistic and realize that things just might not work.
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Honestly, I'm glad I dropped out, because if I had not and had impulsively taken a bid in my despair, I probably wouldn't have been as happy. After reading all of your posts, I'm realizing that maybe where I thought I'd fit in isn't where I DID fit in, and that I should have given the other chapters another chance. So that's exactly what I'll do in the fall. Keep in touch with as many girls as possible, and i think that in itself will make me excited about joining any of the sororities!
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I'm glad that you're open to taking a bid from one of the other groups if they offer it, but keep in mind that these will be the same groups that you turned down this semester. The bold concerns me. If you receive a bid from your 2nd or 3rd choice, are you going to assume that you won't be happy?
First of all, there are numerous girls who go through recruitment (many of whom post here on Greekchat) who ended up with their 2nd or 3rd choice, and while disappointed at first, ended up loving their chapter and couldn't picture themselves anywhere else. You really don't know if that would have happened to you.
What you should do: Really analyze why you didn't accept a bid from your 2nd and 3rd choice. Was it because they "weren't for you," or was it because you built your top choice up so much in your mind, you just thought that #1 is better than #2, and you wouldn't "settle for less" by accepting a bid to anyone other than #1?
Hybrid Mode
