Question for Rec Writers from a Rec Writer

[DubaiSis]

I think if she's kept her grades high, has been involved on campus, made friends, hasn't shot herself in the foot for one reason or another, and you still think she's a great gal, why not? If you like her enough to really try to help, you could say she went through but really wasn't prepared for all of it (stress, number of people, the process, whatever), gave her one option a true shot but still didn't feel it, and this year after getting to know some girls and being familiar with the school, she feels like she's in a much better position to put her best foot forward. I don't think there's any reason to feel like she doesn't deserve another chance.

[WCsweet<3]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

I think if she's kept her grades high, has been involved on campus, made friends, hasn't shot herself in the foot for one reason or another, and you still think she's a great gal, why not? If you like her enough to really try to help, you could say she went through but really wasn't prepared for all of it (stress, number of people, the process, whatever), gave her one option a true shot but still didn't feel it, and this year after getting to know some girls and being familiar with the school, she feels like she's in a much better position to put her best foot forward. I don't think there's any reason to feel like she doesn't deserve another chance.

I think I would ask to have coffee/lunch with her and discuss things with her. Obviously I don't know her, but I really appreciate she tried it out. This is going off the assumptions you posted about her fb page. However, I'd try to meet up with her and really see what happened. Not trying to be a gossip, but if it was just because she didn't feel comfortable or if she had trouble finding friends in the chapter, I'd be worried about her going through recruitment again. As I have gathered from GC, SEC chapters aren't exactly small so if it was not connecting to people it might be a red flag.

I know KD has certain requirements for members such as GPA but also being involved outside KD. I'd probably also see if she was involved and kept up with the other requirements similarly to what DubaiSis mentioned. Kind of like seeing if she could add on another activity or if she would be adding on many parts for one activity.

As for putting on that it is her second time going through recruitment... Unless she took actual roles in her pledge class such as sisterhood chair, I wouldn't mention the actual chapter. They might already know that (they would at my school, not necessarily at an SEC) Well in the meeting with her I'd ask what she wants from a sorority and potentially what was missing from her last chapter. I might include that.
Something along the lines of:
Suzie PNM is really interested in finding sisterhood that will last her beyond her college years. A place where similar interest are shared blah blah blah.
She went through recruitment in Fall 2011 and saw potential/promise/opportunities in XYZ. (some way of saying that she is really interested in the chapter so they might give a second look at a sophomore) She would be a great addition to the chapter. blah blah blah

[33girl]

If this is a super competitive SEC school - i.e. the kind where sororities are looking for reasons to cut girls, not because they're meanies but because RFM forces them to - disclosing that she pledged before (at a sorority that might not be considered the best) and then dropped is an easy reason to say "whew. Let's can her so we can try and get the zillion other girls we really love and have no second thoughts about."

Also, you might want to think about how your writing a second rec for her will reflect on anyone else you write a rec for - what it will do to your credibility.

Personally, I would decline. I just don't see this coming out well, for you or for her. If she's gotten to know sorority women as friends, not just acquaintances, I think it would be better for one of them to hook her up with a rec (if it's required for pledging).