Friend zone or endzone????

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Lots of the guys who complain "she only wants a player, she doesn't want a nice guy" are really NOT that big of a catch. They're passive aggressive, or they want a girl to make all the decisions (i.e. they want a mommy who they can also have sex with). Or they think just because they look great on paper, girls should be falling all over them. Sexual attraction is something you can't make happen.

Being nice does not mean being a doormat, but some guys just don't get that. If a girl is rude or mean to you or keeps jerking you (or other guys, for that matter) around, call her on her shit. She'll respect you a lot more. Part of the reason I'm friends with the guys I'm friends with is they will, always, call me on my crap. If they just sat around saying "oh honey, that's so awful, here let me buy you a drink and a Dairy Queen blizzard and we can talk about it" I wouldn't want to be around them for a minute.

Originally Posted by WCsweet<3

This and everything else. Call it chemistry, fireworks, spark or whatever. A guy/romantic interest can be great but if we don't hit it off then we can't force it.

Totally agree with both of you. You can't make chemistry happen. It is either there or it isn't, even if a guy is fantastic in every way.

And a lot of the time, the guy saying that nice guys finish last is a doormat or passive aggressive.

[southbymidwest]

Originally Posted by AGDee

And a lot of the time, the guy saying that nice guys finish last is a doormat or passive aggressive.

This. They can also be, as my mother calls them, guilt engineers.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by southbymidwest

This. They can also be, as my mother calls them, guilt engineers.

That's a perfect name for them.

My best friend/college sweetheart constantly gets himself placed in the "friend box." He totally does it to himself. I told him he kids around too much with the girls he likes--he doesn't have to be super serious but the innuendoes and double entendres automatically will put a guy in the friend box. Plus, he tries to help them solve their issues (usually involving other guys). It's just a bad scene but it's his pattern to work out.