Rush - What to NOT do or say

[DeltaBetaBaby]

I lived with two women from another chapter my senior year, and absolutely we talked. Mostly it was about blatantly rude PNM's and things like that, though.

PNM's should react to the situation. If you are preffed by someone with whom you have built a relationship during recruitment (or knew before recruitment), and she says something like "I'd love to see you here on bid day", of course you can respond in kind.

If, OTOH, your rusher is saying things like "I hope you've enjoyed recruitment", than saying "this is my favorite house!!!" is going to be a little creepy.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

I lived with two women from another chapter my senior year, and absolutely we talked. Mostly it was about blatantly rude PNM's and things like that, though.

PNM's should react to the situation. If you are preffed by someone with whom you have built a relationship during recruitment (or knew before recruitment), and she says something like "I'd love to see you here on bid day", of course you can respond in kind.

If, OTOH, your rusher is saying things like "I hope you've enjoyed recruitment", than saying "this is my favorite house!!!" is going to be a little creepy.

Yeah it's not that we never talked at all, it's just that talking about Suzy PNM saying we were her favorite would never have occurred to us. What conversation did happen was more "LOL can you believe X" and "I'm so effing tired."

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

Yeah it's not that we never talked at all, it's just that talking about Suzy PNM saying we were her favorite would never have occurred to us. What conversation did happen was more "LOL can you believe X" and "I'm so effing tired."

Yes, but if you tell more than one chapter that they are your absolute favorite...well...that could get around.

[SWTXBelle]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Yes, but if you tell more than one chapter that they are your absolute favorite...well...that could get around.

Eh - it could well be that in the heat of the moment at pref that chapter WAS your absolute favorite. Many a mind has been changed during pref - heck, many a mind has been changed whilst the pnm stared at that preference ranking form.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Eh - it could well be that in the heat of the moment at pref that chapter WAS your absolute favorite. Many a mind has been changed during pref - heck, many a mind has been changed whilst the pnm stared at that preference ranking form.

After my first pref party I was 90% sure, truly, that I would list them first. I then went to the second and suicided for my organization. I've watched a ton of PNMs pull the exact same thing. That's why I personally caution against saying for certain Polly PNM only wants XYZ...because minds can change so easily. At least once she makes it to pref, saying XYZ is her favorite is very unlikely to effect her chances if she does change her mind right before she signs the card.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

It seems to me that everyone is assuming that the actives in a chapter will know both where the pnm ranked them, and where the chapter ranked her (Bid list #1 or #2). Is that often the case? In my experience, only a few actives and alumnae know how the chips fall . . . which is good. No new member should have a "Bid list #2" label pinned on her, nor should a chapter know if it was not the new member's first choice.

Yeah the average chapter member would probably be capable of knowing where the PNM is on their bid list, but they'd have to be doing it themselves during MS. That would be nearly impossible and highly unlikely. They wouldn't know where the PNM ranked them unless she told them and was honest about it.

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Yes, but if you tell more than one chapter that they are your absolute favorite...well...that could get around.

Yeah and that would probably happen early on, "we had a girl tell us we were her favorite after the first night!" "Really? We did too, and so did OPQ." "Wait was it So-and-so with the yellow dress?" "YES! OMG"
Actives have their own favorites and can probably figure out who any particular PNM is with effort, but off the top of their head there are probably very few PNMs being talked about in detail with other chapters, and many who they won't recall the names of until later rounds just due to shear numbers.

[AnchorAlumna]

Along the lines of cleaning up your Facebook profile and/or locking it up....I recently looked up a PNM and she had her page locked....not unusual. I do hate it though...she could have at least put up a flattering profile pic and left something - high school or something - so you can tell she's the "Jenn Johnson from Podunk High going to Big State U."

HOWEVER...searching her name on Google turned up where she posted on a page for people searching for dorm roommates at Big State. There is a list of questions that each person answers. Some of her answers were....ahem...interesting.
Example:

"Party or study? PARTAY.....HELLL YEAH!!!!!!

Not that big a deal....it was her other more explicit, even more illuminating answers that raised the eyebrows.
OTHO....go ahead and leave it up, girly....nobody will know!!
Right.