How to make it work?

[DubaiSis]

Good at recruitment =/= good chapter or sisterhood
Bad at recruitment =/= bad chapter or sisterhood

Formal recruitment is such a crap shoot. It works out for most of us because frankly in any group of 100 women (plus or minus whatever it takes) there are going to be plenty of women we connect with. But seriously, your future best friend in the world could be the girl sitting in the basement working the numbers all week.

The girl I loved loved loved during rush was never a friend after pledging. Man she was great at rush, but it was all fake. There were lots of girls who joined because of her who had to re-evaluate and find other friends fast after pledging. Thankfully the rest of the house (who were generally not great rushers) were sweet and genuine and very chill.

You only THINK you fit better with the other house, but you aren't basing that on anything real. Chin up and go be a good sister!

[Jobellesis]

I accepted a bid from my second choice. It was hard walking into that room and I felt a little strange for about a week. I became friends with my pledge sisters first because we spent so much time together. It took longer to know the actives, so don't give up if you don't feel really close to them at first.

I was an active member for 4 years and as active as an alumna can be living out in the sticks. I'm so glad things worked out the way they did 35 years ago. My other choice is a terrific organization, but Chi O was the one for me. I just didn't know it after pref parties. I have always been honest about listing Chi Omega as my second choice, and I have always been thankful that Chi Omega wanted me more than my first choice did. They saw something first choice didn't see.

Be an active member of your sorority. Don't just go to meetings. Go to sisterhood events, play sports etc. You'll more than likely discover that you love your sisters and can't imagine not being their sister.

[AZTheta]

HJ Greek had this on their FB page this morning. How appropriate, I thought, for your situation:

"Sisterhood and brotherhood is a condition people have to work at." ~Maya Angelou

And I couldn't agree more with this:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

And I loved my years as a collegian, but think of these 4 years as 4 years out of 70+ you have left. Because once you're initiated you have a lifetime to be a member.

Did not see any harshness directed at you; rather, lots of support and great suggestions. My take: you're being truthful AND you're a little more mature as a junior, so you're looking at this and processing through it quickly. I am pleased that you've already come to feel strongly about your chapter and that you know that they wanted you very much. It took me a while to feel that I "fit" in; I kept comparing my insides to everyone else's outsides, which is a guaranteed recipe for disaster.

If you wish, come back and share with us from time to time; we like to hear how things go after recruitment. Welcome to the wonderful world of sisterhood. It IS for a lifetime. You'll have a bond with all of us, regardless of letters.

[DoctorD]

Originally Posted by AzTheta

You'll have a bond with all of us, regardless of letters.

This statement alone made me wish I could "like" this post.

[lechat]

I was fine like 30 minutes after I made this thread, lol. I think it was just a fleeting kind disappointment. Honestly, I don't think i would have fit in at the other house overall. There were a few girls there that I DID make friends with, and I'll continue to hang out with them. But the overall house? I fit a thousand times better where I went.

I love where I am and I love my new sisters. I was letting the recruitment process cloud the fact that I really do get along with these girls. It just took a little time outside of everything to realize that.

I haven't read through this completely yet, so I'm not sure how harsh everyone was. But I definitely wasn't trying to be ungrateful or bratty at all - I was just confused and I let expectations get in the way.