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For all of you that were kind and willing to share positive advice, I greatly appreciate it. For those who feel I am being a heli-parent (which I guess is a lingo term for helicopter parent), that I am certainly not. Our family dynamic is much different than most, and my daughter's life is certainly not average, normal or even "easy" as some have made it out to be. My daughter is a kid who's mom has cancer. A sucky life I suspect although she would never let me know that. After her 12+ hours at school, she gets the pleasure of coming home to a Dad and her two younger siblings and doing what ever her Dad needs her to do. Typically giving her 7 year old sisters a bath, doing what little homework they may have (just 2nd graders) and talking to them about their day. We end the day with a conference call with a Mom that simply can't be their physically, yet craves so much to be a part of every single part of their lives. At that point she goes and does what normal kids her age do and completes her homework. She gets up early in the morning, goes to the gym, comes back to the house, her Dad leaves for work, she takes over with her sister's care, drives them to school and then goes to school herself. So I apologize if looking for a little bit of advice for my daughter was a crime on this board. It is really all I get to do all day. Read about this, read about that, try to find something to talk to my daughter about that does not involve cancer, chemo cocktails and missing hair. I have lived on the 7th floor of this hospital for over 4 months and I see no light at the end of this tunnel. I see my children twice a week at best (I am almost an three hours away) and my husband three times a week only because he comes to this city for business. He of course is under tremendous pressure to keep a job that holds the insurance that keeps me here. And when he is not doing that, he is doing my job. And all I do is sit and stew like the cancer filled person I am.
So really, I am just a mom, who wants to be normal with my daughter. My daughter who understands that research and paying bills and ordering stuff online is all I get to do anymore (okay I do get to visit radiology ever other day or so...so I do "get out"). So again, I certainly apologize for stepping on toes here. I have encouraged my daughter to post here, and maybe she will do just that. But of course for me, it will be my last post as I see I have no place here. So for all of you who judge, criticize and play a bit snarky, just remember this could be you some day and my prayer for you is that when you seek out kindness that you actually receive it. When you pass the lady in the grocery store who you tisk tisk for looking a hot mess, remember, she might have been told she had cancer yesterday, she may have lost a child, she may have lost a husband, etc. Not everyone has a picture perfect life. But for the ones that do, please cherish them because they are rare and every life is beautiful.
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