Feeling Misled by Sorority

[violetpretty]

I actually didn't drink at all until I was 21. I had 6 semesters as a member before I drank. Assuming your chapter has a house, spend a lot of time there, like week nights, studying and taking breaks to get a snack in the kitchen or watch a little tv. Get to know as many of your sisters as possible. Assuming you are already academically driven, you're probably going to continue to get good grades, and maybe your habits will rub off on your sisters.

I lived in the house for three years, and one thing I realized was that although some people go out 3-4+ nights per week, someone is always staying in to study on any given weeknight. Just try not to alienate. Emphasize your non-judgemental attitude by going out with your sisters on the weekends and not drinking yourself.

[Katmandu]

VioletpPretty gave really good advice. Don't let this initial impression cause you to withdraw emotionally or stay away from events and sisters. That will only guarantee that you don't feel at home. If your chapter has a house, go over a lot, not just at required times. If they have optional study halls....attend as many as possible. Get to know as many sisters as you can by being proactive and reaching out to them.

Every chapter has a wide variety of people, no matter what image they project during recruitment. Even if the chapter is 50 women or less, you will find a number to bond with. Why make a decision now? You haven't even scratched the surface and you can't join another group right now anyway. Throw yourself into the experience and you may be surprised at what you discover.

Don't state at every occasion, "I don't drink" or "I don't party". That annoys even other people who obstain. From my own experience, it's also entirely possible to have rewarding and wonderful relationships with women who are completely different from you--without sacrificing your goals or changing your behavior. I was very involved in my major and classes, working towards admittance to a top grauate school. I was highly involved in campus activities and partied in college, but occasionally, not regularly. Yet, some of my most treasured moments and memories were with the wild children of the house--they added the leaven to my whole wheat and I was better for it and so were they!

Enjoy your new member time!