Wedding Invitation Etiquette Question

[APhi Sailorgirl]

For me a shower is normally where gifts are given just for the fun of breaking the bows off, etc and all those silly myths.

With that, a gift card/money/check whatever is just as happy in my home as a gift. I was more happy to see lots of friends in one place than any other part of the shower really.

And as for the "open" gift type parties, those are boring. I want the tacky bow plate rehearsal bouquet. So I need those gifts wrapped people!

[greeklawgirl]

Originally Posted by OneTimeSBX

i dont know if this is a regional thing, and i scanned to see if i saw anyone mention it, but there is a practice here of having a bridal "showcase" for lack of a better word...

basically you register for the gifts and have them sent to your home, and they are displayed around the house with the purchasers name in front of it...so people walk around eating and talking about how Mary's cheap a** only got you a toaster, while Amy was SOOOO generous and sprung for that entire Rachel Ray cookware set...how ballsy is THAT???

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

It is a southern "thing", and I don't much care for it. It was more widespread at one time - look at "Father of the Bride" with Elizabeth Taylor - but has died down somewhat.

I guess it would keep your guests from going too cheap, which I do not think is a lofty goal.

Its not just a regional thing--its a cultural thing. I had a "sip and see" as well, although I would never EVER put people's names in front of the gifts. I wouldn't want my friends and family to feel embarrassed. The gifts took over my parents' dining room! Anyway, I think in the Greek culture its a left-over vestige of the times when brides had dowries and everyone in the village came to the bride's house to see.

[SWTXBelle]

Originally Posted by greeklawgirl

Its not just a regional thing--its a cultural thing. I had a "sip and see" as well, although I would never EVER put people's names in front of the gifts. I wouldn't want my friends and family to feel embarrassed. The gifts took over my parents' dining room! Anyway, I think in the Greek culture its a left-over vestige of the times when brides had dowries and everyone in the village came to the bride's house to see.

Sorry - I did not mean to insinuate that it was ONLY a southern thing - but given that SBX is in Virginia, I thought I would address it from the southern perspective. So, it is a southern thing, and apparently also a Greek thing. Any others?

I like your idea of not putting the guests' names in front of the gifts - although you would have to be very, VERY careful about discussing that tacky gift with someone.

[OneTimeSBX]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Sorry - I did not mean to insinuate that it was ONLY a southern thing - but given that SBX is in Virginia, I thought I would address it from the southern perspective. So, it is a southern thing, and apparently also a Greek thing. Any others?

I like your idea of not putting the guests' names in front of the gifts - although you would have to be very, VERY careful about discussing that tacky gift with someone.

i can see it now, standing next to someone who is mumbling "my god, WHO on earth bought her that awful cutlery?? and from Target? how cheap!" and YOU are the cheap tacky Target shopper lol!

my dad hates the idea of a registry at ALL and refuses to buy anything off of them! he feels they are rude by telling you what you have to buy, and he is going to give you what he wants you to have lol! i always tell him it is SO not that serious!

[ZTABullwinkle]

Originally Posted by APhi Sailorgirl

For me a shower is normally where gifts are given just for the fun of breaking the bows off, etc and all those silly myths.

With that, a gift card/money/check whatever is just as happy in my home as a gift. I was more happy to see lots of friends in one place than any other part of the shower really.

And as for the "open" gift type parties, those are boring. I want the tacky bow plate rehearsal bouquet. So I need those gifts wrapped people!

Almost all of my gifts have not had a ribbon, so I have a pretty small rehearsal bouquet. I noticed that many of my gifts came with the price tag still attached! (Including a card I got yesterday.) My mom always taught me to remove pricetags from gifts before wrapping (there is a running joke at Christmas as to whose gift will have a tag attached). Is this the norm nowadays?

[33girl]

Originally Posted by ZTABullwinkle

Almost all of my gifts have not had a ribbon, so I have a pretty small rehearsal bouquet. I noticed that many of my gifts came with the price tag still attached! (Including a card I got yesterday.) My mom always taught me to remove pricetags from gifts before wrapping (there is a running joke at Christmas as to whose gift will have a tag attached). Is this the norm nowadays?

Umm NO. I can't believe anyone would be so tacky as to do that!!!

[ZTABullwinkle]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Umm NO. I can't believe anyone would be so tacky as to do that!!!

Thank you. I was wondering about that. I didn't notice the price tags at first, but my mom sure did when we taking the gifts out to the car.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by ZTABullwinkle

Thank you. I was wondering about that. I didn't notice the price tags at first, but my mom sure did when we taking the gifts out to the car.

Oh TEH TACKY.

[ZTAMich]

Originally Posted by ZTABullwinkle

Almost all of my gifts have not had a ribbon, so I have a pretty small rehearsal bouquet. I noticed that many of my gifts came with the price tag still attached! (Including a card I got yesterday.) My mom always taught me to remove pricetags from gifts before wrapping (there is a running joke at Christmas as to whose gift will have a tag attached). Is this the norm nowadays?

I think my mom told me once about a superstition that for every ribbon you break at your shower you'll have a baby! So perhaps they are saving you with not that much ribbon
One of my OOT friends brought us a gift to the wedding. It was in a gift bag along with the entire registry print out and a card she had forgotten to sign. Oh and with the receipt. Thank goodness THAT was in there or I never would have known who gave the gift!

[AGDee]

At showers around here, the bride opens every gift in front of the whole group and announces who it is from so I don't see how the "sip and see" would be any more/less embarrassing or tacky than that. Either way, everybody knows who gave what. Gifts of money are also common and the bride generally opens the card, says "A gift of money from... " but doesn't say that amount. It seems to me that a sip and see would save the guests from a couple hours of "And this toaster is from my neighbor's great aunt's boss" that we have to endure. I kind of like the idea.

It's also fairly common to receive duplicate gifts so including a gift receipt and leaving the price tag on could ease the hassle of returning all those dupes. Some price tags are difficult to remove without destroying the packaging of the item. After all, the bride registered for most of the stuff, she knows how much it cost.

My family abandoned the broken ribbon tradition but did make the paper plate bouquet. The opening of gifts was usually done in a production line at the head table so things were all unwrapped by the time the bride got it. She just had to say what it was and who it was from.

This is a hijack, but I find it exceptionally funny at baby showers when the mom-to-be doesn't know what an item is and has to ask someone.

[aephi alum]

Originally Posted by ZTAMich

I think my mom told me once about a superstition that for every ribbon you break at your shower you'll have a baby! So perhaps they are saving you with not that much ribbon

This is why I was very, very careful unwrapping our engagement party gifts... much to my mother-in-law's disappointment

Originally Posted by AGDee

This is a hijack, but I find it exceptionally funny at baby showers when the mom-to-be doesn't know what an item is and has to ask someone.

Tell me about it! I attended a baby shower a while ago where mom-to-be didn't know what several of the items were. "Is this a onesie?" The kicker: She's a pediatrician!