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Getting a lame thank you note is almost as bad as not getting one at all. A few years ago, my boss was pregnant and I spent more than I would have on a present. She dropped off the thank you on my desk, and is said something bland like "Thanks for the present. We are really looking forward to this new time in our lives." It's important to at least personalize it, people!
And as far as the "no thank you note, no more gifts" rule, I've started doing that. My sister in law is awful - not even a text message thank you and she leaves the present at her parents' house. Now she gets a card for birthdays, etc.
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