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Thank you very much for your suggestions and responses. I'm starting to feel bad for having posted it, but I really did wonder how other people have learned to deal with similar stuff. I think it probably does happen in many other fields. Anyone who deals with the public at large has probably had to deal with a crazy person in a similar way.
The kid has a good guidance counselor who will keep an eye out for any signs of abuse. (She has a smaller number of students because she has the "at risk" kids, and she does actually see them frequently.) I will also notify her if I suspect any abuse as would any of the other teachers. I don't really think that is the direction the mom's nuttiness takes. (In the previous bruise thing, I don't think DFACs substantiated anything.)
My administration is pretty good, but they are frustrating too. In this case, I'd welcome direct instruction from my immediate supervisor about how to handle things, and he seems really reluctant to give any. While theoretically giving me more autonomy, it really just sets me up to flounder around since I can't predict what I can expect administrative support for.
I think more than anything he wants me to make the drama go away, so he doesn't want to meet with the mom or handle the problem.
And this might seem weird, but a home visit would be really strange in my community. I think it would be taken like I was being stalker-ish and over-stepping my role. Even if it were acceptable to my supervisors, it's not something I'd be comfortable with. I kind of want the professional boundary of dealing with my professional responsibilities at my place of employment as much as possible (except of course the ones I bring to GC).
If I taught in a different community where parents wouldn't generally come to the school, I'd probably change my attitude and meet them where they needed me to.
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