Speak up or bite my tongue?

[SydneyK]

Ok, let me ask you all this question...

If your sorority was the one in question (ABC), and I sent you a PM saying so, would you be like, "WTF? Why tell me?" or would you think, "Thanks for passing along the info." ???

Oh, and AlphaGamUGAAlum, you're right about the territorial nature of the flagged tables. It screams of middle school, and let me tell you, if you're not Greek and you sit at one of "their" tables, you'll be told (yes, told, not asked) to leave. I've seen it happen and it's not pretty. I'm so glad the Greek culture at my school was nothing like this, or I'd probably never have gotten involved!

Thanks for all the responses, btw.

[texas*princess]

Originally Posted by SydneyK

Ok, let me ask you all this question...

If your sorority was the one in question (ABC), and I sent you a PM saying so, would you be like, "WTF? Why tell me?" or would you think, "Thanks for passing along the info." ???.

I think it would really depend on who you send it to in a pm in the GLO. Personally, I'm not overly involved with my alum org or my sorority on a national level, so I'd be like "Oooook... that sucks that it was a chapter of my sorority, but every sorority has bad chapters, right?" As much as I'd like to think that all members of all sororities are perfect little angels, I know that's not the case in the real world. If it were to a member who is clearly more involved than I am, they possibly might be more interested in knowing.

[AnatraAmore]

I think it would depend on your relationship with the person you are tell as well as how involved they are. As an alum, I'm pretty involved with my chapter, but I think that how I would react to that situation would also depend on who was telling me and what they thought I was going to do with that information...

[Zillini]

Originally Posted by SydneyK

If your sorority was the one in question (ABC), and I sent you a PM saying so, would you be like, "WTF? Why tell me?" or would you think, "Thanks for passing along the info." ???.

It depends on who you pass the info along to. I'd say "Thanks for the info" and this situation would be dealt with. But I'm a Chapter Advisor and that's part of my job IMO. If on the other hand I weren't an active alum I'd probably say something similar to Texas*Princess, "I hate to hear that" and wonder to myself what exactly am I supposed to do with this info?

[adpiucf]

I guess my question is, why do you care? I do think that sorority women should mind their P's and Q's in public, but that's why they have standards programming built into their membership education program.

If you encounter this again, go up to the girls and say, "I'm a sorority alum from another school and I couldn't help but overhear you bashing the other chapters here. I'm really disappointed and I felt so strongly that I needed to say something-- the way you are talking right now has left me with a very bad impression of your sorority, not the others. I am sure you are all better people than the way you've just portrayed yourselves. Please watch what you're saying in public and please be Panhellenic. Thanks for letting me get that off my chest."

I don't think you need to go reporting them to anyone.

[UGAalum94]

Oh, I don't know, ADPiUCF, as much as I like to deal directly with people and not turn to other people to address something I could handle myself: a group of people willing to publicly and loudly bash another group might not react to a stranger's admonishment as well as we might hope. Unless you have some reason to think they will be receptive, I don't think I'd want to be part of the scene that might follow.

I think that you should find out who the chapter advisor is and tell her. I think usually wouldn't take more than two phone calls to do so: one to Greek life and one to the advisor.

The information just puts any other alumna in a odd position, and might end up doing more harm than good. (If a chapter had never heard a peep out of me ever, why would it be particularly helpful to hear a second hand criticism through me? If enough alumnae hear negative stories about a chapter, will it erodes support for a struggling chapter from within the organization itself?)

Take it to the chapter advisor, or even better, to the undergraduate chapter president.