Relationship - Taking a Break

PrettyBoy · #1 08-15-2007, 08:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EyesOnThePrize

Now PrettyBoy would you be so kind as to bestow your knowledge upon to the rest of your gender? Preferably those in SoCal?? Preferably those in your frat???

LOL. There's a lot of men like myself, we're just hard to find because we don't hang out where most other people do. For example, when I'm not working, a night out for me is either at home, out bowling, or relaxing at a coffee shop or the bookstore.

Yeah, I'm not down with taking breaks at all. That's unacceptable.

EyesOnThePrize · #2 08-16-2007, 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PrettyBoy

[B]For example, when I'm not working, a night out for me is either at home, out bowling, or relaxing at a coffee shop or the bookstore.

I can accept that. *off to my local Barnes and Noble, to pick up a chai latte and then go bowling*

Munchkin03 · #3 08-17-2007, 02:35 PM

My ex, when I asked to break up nearly 2 years ago, asked for a break instead. That was really funny. I went with it for two weeks, and then just broke up with him.

So it's not just women who push for these things...

DaemonSeid · #4 08-17-2007, 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PrettyBoy

LOL. There's a lot of men like myself, we're just hard to find because we don't hang out where most other people do. For example, when I'm not working, a night out for me is either at home, out bowling, or relaxing at a coffee shop or the bookstore.

Yeah, I'm not down with taking breaks at all. That's unacceptable.

ditto to what he said....if my s/o asked for a break...she can have one...til the next lifetime...when u invest in someone and they start having cold feet...what's to keep them from doing it again?

If someone wanted to break from me, trust me, the next woman that gets in line is fair game

Now...break on them....

OneTimeSBX · #5 08-17-2007, 04:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

ditto to what he said....if my s/o asked for a break...she can have one...til the next lifetime...when u invest in someone and they start having cold feet...what's to keep them from doing it again?

If someone wanted to break from me, trust me, the next woman that gets in line is fair game

Now...break on them....

Daemon you know you are too good of a catch for Future Mrs. Daemon to start trippin on you and need to take a break lol! you know your sh*t dont stink!

cheerfulgreek · #6 08-17-2007, 08:06 PM

When I think of taking a break, I connect that with work, or doing something strenuous. Those are things that get me to say I need a break. It's the same with relationships. If it's that much work to the point where it becomes strenuous, then it's time to take a break. A relationship like that is not worth being apart of. I wouldn't be in a relationship like that.

AKA_Monet · #7 08-18-2007, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

When I think of taking a break, I connect that with work, or doing something strenuous. Those are things that get me to say I need a break. It's the same with relationships. If it's that much work to the point where it becomes strenuous, then it's time to take a break. A relationship like that is not worth being apart of. I wouldn't be in a relationship like that.

I dunno Cheerful, if you unable to work it out now, could you do it when you are married to someone? Although a reflection of what your future situations might be, if you leave and walk out that door, you cannot come back...

Most significant others have two faults: character flaws and differences in point of view. Some of these faults rarely change, some by persuasive argument. Inevitably, if it is a character flaw in your significant other, it will rarely change--i.e. you're a spendthrift and he's miserly... But, if it is a point of view issue, then your significant other has a higher probability to be persuaded to change--i.e. whether to buy bottled water vs. water from the tap. Or rather, you all just mutually agree to disagree... ("Towmato" vs. "Toe motto").

It is good to get outta the house and do your own thing for a few hours. And during the moment of a heated argument, you can do a "T" with your hands and say "timeout". Then come back to the discussion to see what the real difficulty is...

I can say, it has been my experience that it has to do with insecurities people have, in general.

cheerfulgreek · #8 08-19-2007, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

I dunno Cheerful, if you unable to work it out now, could you do it when you are married to someone? Although a reflection of what your future situations might be, if you leave and walk out that door, you cannot come back...

Most significant others have two faults: character flaws and differences in point of view. Some of these faults rarely change, some by persuasive argument. Inevitably, if it is a character flaw in your significant other, it will rarely change--i.e. you're a spendthrift and he's miserly... But, if it is a point of view issue, then your significant other has a higher probability to be persuaded to change--i.e. whether to buy bottled water vs. water from the tap. Or rather, you all just mutually agree to disagree... ("Towmato" vs. "Toe motto").

It is good to get outta the house and do your own thing for a few hours. And during the moment of a heated argument, you can do a "T" with your hands and say "timeout". Then come back to the discussion to see what the real difficulty is...

I can say, it has been my experience that it has to do with insecurities people have, in general.

Of course not. I wouldn't leave my spouse, unless he cheated on me, and even then I would still try and work through that. I'm not sure how far I would get but I would at least try. I know we all have our differences but if I was in a relationship that was so bad that I really had to work to the point that I felt I needed a break all the time, then I wouldn't think that was the right person for me, so I would have to break it off and move on. It would hurt but I would do it. I mean I know relationships can get rocky sometimes and they do take work, but how bad does it have to get in order to take a break? A break to me means hey I'm tired of this and I need a break. I know sometimes we need to get away and say timeout, and that's o.k. but a temporary break as in let's separate for awhile and then reunite? It has to be pretty bad for me to do that.

AKA_Monet · #9 08-19-2007, 10:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

Of course not. I wouldn't leave my spouse, ...but how bad does it have to get in order to take a break? A break to me means hey I'm tired of this and I need a break. I know sometimes we need to get away and say timeout, and that's o.k. but a temporary break as in let's separate for awhile and then reunite? It has to be pretty bad for me to do that.

Well, one should not go into a marital relationship with assumption of requiring a "break" when things get "very bad". Very bad without the presumption of physical/sexual abuse and infidelity, is when one's spouse has a severe thought disorder causing illogical activities--i.e. buying a $90K vehicle when the couple does not have about $50K yearly... Or credit problems seem to follow along. Or one spouse totally losses a job and half the debts cannot be paid.

The marriage vows state these issues: Sickness and Health, Rich or Poor...

Many relationships START OFF sick and poor and the couple thinks that Love can win out. Most of the time, realistically: "When's the last time that Love bought you clothes... It's like that and that's the way it is..." (Run DMC circa 1984).

The issue is when we enter SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS--because that is my ONLY comments--IMHO, one needs to be introspective when knowing what they can and cannot handle. In nonserious dating or even hanging out makes no difference about breaks or not. Until the man puts a ring on my finger, he has no dictates on what I do nor where I go. That is the price to be in my presence.

If a man doesn't want that from me, then "Thank you", I can move forward...

Taking a break in the relationship to see if someone out there is better? If you seriously want to get married, No--not functional. If you are not serious, then who cares? There is no obligation. The only thing is be careful what you wish for...

cheerfulgreek · #10 08-19-2007, 11:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

ditto to what he said....if my s/o asked for a break...she can have one...til the next lifetime...when u invest in someone and they start having cold feet...what's to keep them from doing it again?

If someone wanted to break from me, trust me, the next woman that gets in line is fair game

Now...break on them....

What if you really loved that person and she wanted to come back? You would just end it like that?