Alpha Phi dies of alcohol poisioning at SDSU

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I don't understand why people think it's OK to use a teenager's or young adult's death by misadventure to "teach a lesson" to his peers.

And I don't understand why you don't think a parent or teacher can initiate a respectful conversation with their kid or student when tragedy hits close to home. I also don't understand why you can't see that such respectful conversations can be had without being insenstive, without lecturing, without showing stupid movies, without hitting people over the head or shoving messages down their throats, and without dishonoring anyone's memory or anyone's feelings.

I guess we will just have to agree that we don't understand each other on this one and move on. But please, just because someone doesn't share your understanding doesn't make them "pathetic" or "revolting."

[33girl]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

And I don't understand why you don't think a parent or teacher can initiate a respectful conversation with their kid or student when tragedy hits close to home. I also don't understand why you can't see that such respectful conversations can be had without being insenstive, without lecturing, without showing stupid movies, without hitting people over the head or shoving messages down their throats, and without dishonoring anyone's memory or anyone's feelings.

I guess we will just have to agree that we don't understand each other on this one and move on. But please, just because someone doesn't share your understanding doesn't make them "pathetic" or "revolting."

Because I think it's disrespectful to anyone, be they 6 or 60, to interfere when they are trying to deal with a death, unless your assistance is requested. Everyone deals with it differently and it's a very individual thing, even if it's your child or spouse dealing with it. That's pretty much the sum of it. The important thing is that your child lost a friend, not how the friend was lost.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Because I think it's disrespectful to anyone, be they 6 or 60, to interfere when they are trying to deal with a death, unless your assistance is requested. Everyone deals with it differently and it's a very individual thing, even if it's your child or spouse dealing with it. That's pretty much the sum of it. The important thing is that your child lost a friend, not how the friend was lost.

When it comes to one's children, what you call "intefering" I think I would call "parenting." Ah well, you say potato . . . .

Like I said, we're going to have to agree to disagree here, because it doesn't seem that I am persuading you, and I can assure you that you're not persuading pathetic and revolting me.

[DeltAlum]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

When it comes to one's children, what you call "intefering" I think I would call "parenting.")

I agree -- and we've been through it with our kids -- including friend's OD's, fatal traffic accidents while under the influence, suicides and other tragedies.

If a parent doesn't offer some guidance, they're taken to task for being bad parents.

There's no winning here.

It's interesting now that our "problem child" who "experimented with 'casual'" drugs and finally realized whe was killing herself and went through a thankfully successful rehab looks back now and says, "Dad, most of what you and mom told me turned out to be true, even thought I didn't believe it at the time."