I guess the only way to respond is...well I dunno, I'd say take it as it's meant. On the one hand, you clearly have a lot of compassion for women who have been discriminated against because of their dark skin, and that's commendable.
How are you expressing this to them would be my main question. A lot of times expressions of sympathy can come across as condescending (ever had a white person tell you that they're really "down"- you know what I mean). It could be that is how it comes across sometimes, but you seem pretty clear in your meaning so I wonder.
Regardless of how you express yourself, it is NEVER ok for someone to disrespect you. If they get too high and mighty then tell them to back off. Being sympathetic is one thing- being a doormat is another.
Quote:
Originally Posted by christiangirl
Quick disclaimer: I know this thread went out a month ago, but I needed to rant and FINALLY had the sense to do a search before I started a new topic  .
I have a non-traditional problem with my skin color and I've been having it(literally) since the day I was born. My parents and sister are significantly darker than I am, so no one ever believes I'm really a part of my family. The day I was born, my mother's white coworker came to the hospital and the staff assumed she was my grandmother as a way of explaining my color despite my parents'. I've heard everything from "Your momma must've been creepin'" to "I didn't know you were adopted!" But's that's just scratching the surface. My real problem is that I have been complimented for being soooo pretty and soooo smart for as long as I can remember--because I'm light. That may not seem like a problem, but it's the start of one. This makes, NOT WHITE PEOPLE OR EVEN BROTHERS hate on me, but my beautifully dark-skinned counterparts.
Darker skinned women often celebrate themselves in a rebuttal to the madness, and rightfully so! This world is full of "Black is beautiful" type slogans. However, when I jump on the bandwagon and agree with such statements, nearly every darker woman has verbally slapped me in the face. I've been told numerous times that I already get praise for being light because looking closer to white is what's celebrated and I should be satisfied with that. Now, I'm trying to steal the thunder away from the REAL nubian queens and I'm just being "greedy" and an "attention hog." So what am I supposed to do?? Many of my darker skinned sisters accuse me of trying to "pass" because of the way that I speak and dress and that I need to "act more black."  But that many more tell me I'm not one of them and "need to go back to the rest of the white people." |
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