How come I almost never see black women at bars?

Maybe it's the bar itself you go to. If they play damn foo fighters and nsync you might not see any beautiful sisters. I live in Raleigh, NC and I know that if I go to the "Ale House" on Wake Forest Rd. Yeeeeaaaah!! Its going to be what the white folks hate. "Blacked Out!" Full of fine black women. Or if you go to a bar in one of the "chocolate cities," ie; Atlanta, DC, Philly... Then of course your gonna see black women. It's all about location, location, location, and music. Finally, and I praise the black women for this one. Most black women are not gonna chill at a spot filled with more white men then black men.

[CrimsonTide4]

Originally Posted by #3 Tsunami

Finally, and I praise the black women for this one. Most black women are not gonna chill at a spot filled with more white men then black men.

Tis true for this Black woman. I go where I am comfortable and I tend to be more comfortable in my chill time with places that cater to Black people.

I've gone to Cosmos and enjoyed myself because it was a nice mix and no cover charge, lmao.

And I am with those who prefer smoke free or less smoke filled environments. Although a tip I learned is to spray your hair with oil sheen before going to bed and the smell will at least be gone from your hair.

[Dionysus]

Originally Posted by CrimsonTide4

Tis true for this Black woman. I go where I am comfortable and I tend to be more comfortable in my chill time with places that cater to Black people.

I guess I will be honest. I'm very self-conscious in all black social environments. I have no idea how to interact. When you've been the token almost everywhere since you were a young kid, it's actually easy to get used to it.

[CrimsonTide4]

Originally Posted by Dionysus

I guess I will be honest. I'm very self-conscious in all black social environments. I have no idea how to interact.

I was able to discern this about you a long time ago based on your online persona.

[mulattogyrl]

Originally Posted by Dionysus

I guess I will be honest. I'm very self-conscious in all black social environments. I have no idea how to interact. When you've been the token almost everywhere since you were a young kid, it's actually easy to get used to it.

Well un-self-conscious yourself, stop being a token, go out to the clubs where we are and start mingling.

[lovelyivy84]

Many is the time I've beent he black girl inthe bar, and to be honest, most but not all of those times I have been terribly bored. Not so much because there were no other black people, but because I really don't like bars. To me, if I drink alchohol it's got one of two purposes: 1. to get me slightly twisted so that i am ready to go out and dance for a few hours or 2. to go to bed. In order for me to have fun I have to be going with a large, fun group of people I know really well, and even then there's no guarantee.

At bars you just sit down and drink. Yawn. I can do that at my house for waaay cheaper. If I just wanted to talk to my friends while I did it I'd tell them to come over. A lounge at least is more likely to have music I want to listen to.

[tld221]

Originally Posted by Dionysus

I guess I will be honest. I'm very self-conscious in all black social environments. I have no idea how to interact. When you've been the token almost everywhere since you were a young kid, it's actually easy to get used to it.

you know, i have been in situations where ive gotten comfortable being the token, especially at parties and social events. honestly, it would be like a united colors of benetton advertisement, with your (token) asian, black, spanish person. then you get a racially ambiguous person or two, maybe a gay or indian person...

point is, ive been the only "one" in the bar and it can be uncomfortable and such, but come on, sometimes bars have the best deals, like dollar beer night (if youre in NYC, holla at me at Off the Wagon on Mondays) or quarter pitcher night (Wednesdays at Town Tavern). i have learned to like bars, but its not my preference of hangout spots.

some nights im in the mood for a bar, to just sit and have a drink. sure, i can do away with the smoke (i HATE cig smoke, but since NY has no more smoking in bars, dont have to worry anymore. and it irks me when i go out of town and am in a smoky bar) but some nights, i dont want to do the loud music/dance thing.

also in nyc, the lines of bar/restaurant/lounge are blurred, which can be a good thing if you wanna get your dance on one minute and then next just wanna sit down and knock one back.

[DSTCHAOS]

Ugh @ people typing "token" and meaning it.

[tld221]

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS

Ugh @ people typing "token" and meaning it.

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by tld221

Well, "token" is a derogatory reference but being the only black person in most settings (educational, professional, or social) doesn't automatically make you a token unless THEY make you the token.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by tld221

you know, i have been in situations where ive gotten comfortable being the token, especially at parties and social events.

Yeah, that was my grad school experience, and therefore my professional experience, in a nutshell. I can't wait to meet another black person who does what I do. I've met a few engineers who do similar things...close, but no cigar.

I prefer bars to clubs. I went to the 4040 club here in NYC a few weeks ago, and I was booooored. I'm not that much of a dancer. I would rather sit with some friends drinking beers and watching the Red Sox than dancing any day.

[orighu]

Originally Posted by CrimsonTide4

Although a tip I learned is to spray your hair with oil sheen before going to bed and the smell will at least be gone from your hair.

Thanks - that is a helpful tip for the hair......

Although I tease my husband all the time for not wanting to go out to drink cause he's too cheap to want to pay for the drinks - I have to agree with Still_BLUTANG prefer to drink at home

[Dionysus]

Originally Posted by #3 Tsunami

Maybe it's the bar itself you go to. If they play damn foo fighters and nsync you might not see any beautiful sisters. I live in Raleigh, NC and I know that if I go to the "Ale House" on Wake Forest Rd. Yeeeeaaaah!! Its going to be what the white folks hate. "Blacked Out!" Full of fine black women. Or if you go to a bar in one of the "chocolate cities," ie; Atlanta, DC, Philly... Then of course your gonna see black women. It's all about location, location, location, and music. Finally, and I praise the black women for this one. Most black women are not gonna chill at a spot filled with more white men then black men.

Haha....you went there. Yeah, I agree, and that's probably the main reason. Or, afraid of a "Duke" sort of thing happening. I don't think that explains it all though. Come on, only two or three black women out of several hundred people? And, while there's usually more white guys, there's definately enough black guys around. Some Asian and Hispanics too. It looks like Baskin-Robbins somtimes. There's got to be more than five black women in this city who's attracted to more than one flavor of guy.

[DSTinguished1]

I know that here in Indiana most of the African Americans prefer clubs as oppose to bars. Here, bars are strictly for drinking and picking up women/men. There is no dancing and the music is horrible! Most of "us" prefer to dance, get dressed up and go to an establishment where you can drink, dance, and meet other Blacks from campus or in the area. Lounges are also nice because it creates an intimiate atmosphere where you can actually carry on a conversation.

I think I went to 2 bars since I've been in college and I only went because one was free wing night and the other time was Karaoke night. Other than you can find me at the club... Well actually now that I'm saved I'm at home listening to gospel and reading my Bible...LOL.