Quote:
Originally Posted by lyrica9
Can't take her to COR because my new chapter doesn't COR, and she doesn't go to my school. plus, while we're friends, i don't think she'd be a person i'd invite to join adpi. she's a great girl, but not every friend can be a good sister.
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Was trying for optimism there!
Quote:
Originally Posted by lyrica9
so yeah, as soon as we're both here i'm going to ask for my shirts back. which will be hard, because i'll probably have to deal with the question of 'why do i want them back if i think they're so ugly and i never wear them.' but i think i can handle it.
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I've learned that when I focus on the "what ifs" - what if she says abc, what if she does xyz - I work myself up for conversations/events that don't happen (99% of the time)! For me, I have to work out the conversation starting lines, because that is the only part of the conversation overwhich I have complete control. If I begin in a polite, direct, thoughtful, non-confrontational, non-hysterical, non-defensive manner, then the conversation is usually way more pleasant than I could have imagined!
When the conversations DO become ugly, I find that I need to stick to my point and that any other reasons that I provide the person just get us way off track - which is their point, to get me fighting and fighting multiple 'battles' at once, which is tiresome so is tempting to back down...
Stick to your conviction: your letters are meaningful and you really can't have anyone wearing them. (or however you choose to phrase that) You can simply repeat the same expression, if she does become aggitated and asking 1000 questions.
Oh - find the time of day that she's (a) sober; and (b) at her best; and (c) when you are best. If she's a beyotch first thing in the AM but you're perky with your coffee, then that is probably not a good time to approach her. Likewise, if she's a night-owl but you get tired at 9PM, then don't stay up til 11 to talk to her b/c then you're more likely to get upset and lose your point.
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