Open Letter 8 - Page 14

9dstpm · #1 06-12-2008, 09:21 PM

Dear Nikki1920:

You and your daughter are in my prayers

Dear Dennis:

Please forgive the tardiness of my correspondence. On Sunday morning, I came home from work and after settling in and watching my church's TV ministry program, I had an hour to watch something else before "The Soup" on E! came on at 10:30. The TV guide from the Sunday paper said that "Major League" was on TNT, so I headed there, hoping I could catch that yummy scene of you in your really skimpy undies lifting weights in the locker room.

Not.

It was "Major League 3" and you were fully clothed. Honey, that was the most craptastic movie you have ever been in. I realize that you were probably in the midst of a divorce from wife #2 at the time and you were probably behind in your alimony and/or child support payments and you had to make a quick buck. But ML3? Ewww. Even those 15 minutes you appeared on-screen in "Heat" and you got shot full of holes like so much Swiss cheese was way better than the 2 hours of ML3 that you were in. Let's not revisit Pedro Cerrano and the voodoo and Jobu anymore unless Pedro is wearing those skimpy undies, OK? Thank you!

Still your biggest fan ever,

9dstpm

PS: your birthday party was fun. The cake was yummy and in addition to a marathon of the second season of "The Unit", I also watched the first season of "24". For next year's party, I'm looking for some of your more obscure movies like "How To Make the Crulest Month" and "Grambling's White Tiger". I have a like-minded fan contact who knows someone who knows where I can find these movies.

christiangirl · #2 06-12-2008, 11:16 PM

^^^YOU. ARE. TOO. MUCH.

Dear Me,

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??? First, you oversleep for your presentation, but you were tired and had been up all night for a couple nights, I understand. We smoothed that over and you aced it anyway. Then, you STILL can't sleep for no good reason and overslept for work? We've been early to work everyday for two weeks, it's been awesome! It was only 15 minutes so I can overlook that...maybe. But then, you go and take a nap when you promised you wouldn't do that and look what happened. You fell asleep "FOR AN HOUR" this afternoon and now it's after 11pm and you have wasted all the time you were going to spend cleaning up and working on your research paper. This paper is so important, how could you? I am so disappointed in you. Now what? You have to be back at work in 7 hours and you're wide awake.

*sigh* Okay, girl. Work on the paper for an hour, read some Narnia to sooth your nerves, then get some rest cause tomorrow's a long day and there's no time for a nap ANYWHERE in it. That should put us back on track and, if not, we're asking Mr. Doctor Man about this whole not sleepin' thang. *pat pat* It's okay. I forgive you. Just get it together.

CG

nikki1920 · #3 06-15-2008, 11:35 AM

To my GC fam:
Thank you for your condolences. Lilnikki's dad was killed in a motorcycle accident on May 31, one day after his 2 year wedding anniversary, 13 days after our daughter turned 10. She got to spend a year with him, and I am so grateful and happy that she did. He will be buried this Thursday at Arlington National Cemetary. Today is Father's Day. Even if your father is not a presence in your life, please give thanks for him. It's a cliche, but life is truly short and tomorrow is not promised to anyone. Cherish those who love you. I am blessed that he and I had a relationship, and I take great solace in that.

Love,
nikki1920

MeezDiscreet · #4 06-15-2008, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nikki1920

To my GC fam:
Thank you for your condolences. Lilnikki's dad was killed in a motorcycle accident on May 31, one day after his 2 year wedding anniversary, 13 days after our daughter turned 10. She got to spend a year with him, and I am so grateful and happy that she did. He will be buried this Thursday at Arlington National Cemetary. Today is Father's Day. Even if your father is not a presence in your life, please give thanks for him. It's a cliche, but life is truly short and tomorrow is not promised to anyone. Cherish those who love you. I am blessed that he and I had a relationship, and I take great solace in that.

Love,
nikki1920

CrimsonTide4 · #5 06-15-2008, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nikki1920

To my GC fam:
Thank you for your condolences. Lilnikki's dad was killed in a motorcycle accident on May 31, one day after his 2 year wedding anniversary, 13 days after our daughter turned 10. She got to spend a year with him, and I am so grateful and happy that she did. He will be buried this Thursday at Arlington National Cemetary. Today is Father's Day. Even if your father is not a presence in your life, please give thanks for him. It's a cliche, but life is truly short and tomorrow is not promised to anyone. Cherish those who love you. I am blessed that he and I had a relationship, and I take great solace in that.

Love,
nikki1920

Nikki,

You and lilnikki have been on my mind and heart since you first posted of his passing. I remember that she lived with him this past year and I rejoice with you on that. I continue to hold you both in my prayers. I know today and Thursday are challenges for you both. I pray you both lean on each other through this time.

DSTCHAOS · #6 06-15-2008, 12:11 PM

Dear Women

Okay, I love mini dresses and miniskirts. I wear them.

But there are some outfits that are clearly SHIRTS that you turned into a dress. NO. NO. NO. Last night, there were 4 women who turned shirts that barely cover their rear end into a dress. I don't care if you wear swim shorts, or something under it, just in case. IT'S A SHIRT. PERIOD. YOU LOOK STUPID. PERIOD.

If you wore short shorts with a shirt, even if the shirt is longer than the shorts but we can see you have shorts on, that's cool because you KNOW you're wearing short shorts and a shirt. You aren't pretending to be wearing a dress. Ugh.

Sincerely,
One of the Women and Men Who Sat Around Wondering What the Hell You Had On
(I wasn't the one pointing, though, those were the other women and men.)

christiangirl · #7 06-15-2008, 04:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS

But there are some outfits that are clearly SHIRTS that you turned into a dress.

My coworker came in wearing a long shirt and pants then clocked out, took her pants off, and went to the club. I wish I had had this post to show her.

nikki1920 · #8 06-15-2008, 08:07 PM

CT4: :hug: Thank you. I am asking that everyone PLEASE say a few for my daughter.

NinjaPoodle · #9 06-16-2008, 02:38 AM

Dear Homeless Man who harassed me,

You set our race back 400 years.

When I told you NO outside the store, WHY did you follow me cursing and calling me a BLACK BIT** yet, as I chose to ignore you and proceed on my way into the store. You followed me into the store, yelled at someone else then proceeded to find me, yell at the sales associate who helped me, then when I called you on it and told you to leave the scared lady alone, you tried to intimidate me with your 6f, coke bottle wearing, front tooth missing arse, yelling at me. But you stepped over the line when you called me a bit**. Yes, that's when I said "Somebody needs to get this fool out of my face before I put my foot in his retarded ass!" Yes. In the perfume department of Macy's. Why did you walk away? Did you think I wouldn't do it? That's why I put my stuff down. I just wanted to talk..

Pathetic, sad and funny at the same time.

It's too bad security escorted you out. I just wanted to talk....You really did pick the wrong chick to mess with.

PS I can't wait to see the surveillance video on that one!

NinjaPoodle · #10 06-16-2008, 02:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nikki1920

CT4: :hug: Thank you. I am asking that everyone PLEASE say a few for my daughter.

Done.

true_story · #11 06-18-2008, 12:08 AM

Dear Crawfish,
I will NEVER eat you again. You could have at least told me before I tried you that you would make me sick. I can't believe you! Honestly, you had a lil kick to you, but you weren't even that good for me to be feeling so bad. And I missed work! You owe me money for the hours I missed at work. Ugh, I can't even talk to you right now, you disgust me.

Sincerely,
The poor, poor young lady with the allergic reaction

RedefinedDiva · #12 06-18-2008, 11:07 AM

Dear Crawfish,

I am sorry that true_story had such a bad experience with you, but you know that I love you TO DEATH!!! This New Orleans girl is DANGEROUSLY IN LOVE with you!! I can't live without you! It is because of you that I have lived in the South so long. What in the world will I do if I were to move to a city or state that does not have you? Perish the thought!!

Keep on doing what you do. In fact, I might run out and get five pounds today.

RD

MeezDiscreet · #13 06-18-2008, 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedefinedDiva

Dear Crawfish,

I am sorry that true_story had such a bad experience with you, but you know that I love you TO DEATH!!! This New Orleans girl is DANGEROUSLY IN LOVE with you!! I can't live without you! It is because of you that I have lived in the South so long. What in the world will I do if I were to move to a city or state that does not have you? Perish the thought!!

Keep on doing what you do. In fact, I might run out and get five pounds today.

RD

Dear RD,

I'm with you on this one!!!!!!!!!!

true_story · #14 06-19-2008, 10:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MeezDiscreet

Dear RD,

I'm with you on this one!!!!!!!!!!

Dear RD, MeezDiscreet, & Crawfish,

You all can have each other! I'm in love with crab cakes anyway

Spinderella · #15 07-02-2008, 11:08 PM

Dear Fiber & Water (also known as healthy lifestyle),

I am really trying to get into you, but you are causing me problems. Eat fiber and drink water they say. Well for the past 7 days I have adapted to doing just this and it is great; I feel full all the time because all this water expands the luscious fiber in my stomach making me feel satisfied.

But fiber, no matter how good for me you are, you are low brow evil!

I stand in elevators or go around people and think they are the ones with the air filtration problems. But when I am finally alone, I realize it is ME who needs to attach an air filter to my derriere. Fiber, you are making me feel very trifling, especially when that lady walked into my space after you quietly AND discretely slipped your byproduct out of my rear.

Fiber and water, you make me regular and I am catching up on reading about Lil'Wayne but dayum, I didn't have time to sit before, and I don't have time now. But admittedly my dearest friends, fiber and water, I barely read the first paragraphs and its over, so thanks for making things short, sweet and to the point. It just that I don't need 2-3 attempts per day to finish reading about Lil'Wayne.

Fiber and water, I am going to stick with our new relationship, but please speed up the process of me adapting. I need friends and I can't go around explaining "Excuse me for smelling like moldy cardboard soaked in rotten eggs, I am trying to increase my fiber intake".

This random triflingness has to stop.

Thanks in advance for helping me to lose atleast 10 pounds by September.