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Now that (IMO)mostly all of the dots are presented, my thought is this: for an active to (a) write a negative letter against a PNM's membership and (b) stand firm two years later, something unconscionably egregious must have transpired in the active's relationship with the OP.
None of us will discuss membership selection here. That said, I believe that this is a membership selection matter, and that ends it for me.
OP: it does appear clearly that your sorority ship has sailed. I wish you all the best in the future.
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"One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." Bertrand Russell, The Triumph of Stupidity
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