What teachers really want to tell parents.

[MysticCat]

Slow to the party.

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

And I doubt that if the doctor gave you an opinion you would turn to the nurse and say "Is that true?". There's a big difference between challenging a teacher's veracity and asking for clarification. Once you have essentially called the teacher a liar it is going to be very difficult to have an "actual discussion".

SWTXBelle, I agree wholeheartedly with most of what you've said in this thread (and have strived to be the parent you describe as a partner), and I agree mostly with the article, but I can't go with this. Your example is seriously apples and oranges. The teacher is relating a fact, and the hypothetical parent is essentially asking the child to confirm (or deny or explain) the fact. Facts are facts are facts.

The doctor you posit, on the other hand, is offering an opinion. It's his opinion whether the nurse agrees with it or not and regardless of whether it is accurate. Opinions are not facts.

Originally Posted by AGDee

Honestly, I would take the "Is that true?" to mean "You should know better, I can't believe you did that you little monster!" sort of like "What were you thinking???" or "You DIDN'T!"
But I guess it's all about the tone of voice.

Well, my inclination would be to treat it like "how do you plead: Guilty or Not Guilty?," but yeah, this.

And for the record, this is exactly what I have done on occasion. And the few times I've gotten "No, I didn't," I've followed it with something along the lines of "Well, I know Teacher wouldn't tell me something that's not true," coupled with a reminder to the child on the importance of telling the truth and a do-over. The point is not to insinuate that the teacher is a liar. The point is to require the child to own responsibility by saying "Yes, I did that."