Sad recruitment story

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by karmelgirl

Thank you Violet. My daughter could be the girl referenced in the link above. The total package, but from the north and going to a "sort of" southern school. Straight A's, very well dressed, articulate, very well liked in her dorm, outgoing, and I know for a fact she had great recs. I was Greek, so she was also a legacy at a top house.
She spent her winter break getting her wardrobe together, writing thank you's to the alums that wrote her recs...etc...

Round 1 15 houses - had fun, liked most

Round 2 cut by 2 houses, so she went to 8 of her top 10 and 2 from the bottom of her list. Pretty good so far.

Now it gets bad...round three, 6 possible houses... and she gets cut from 5 of her top 7, including her legacy house. That leaves 2 houses she loves, and three from the bottom of her list for a total of 5 parties.

Now it is the day to see where you are going for prefs. That morning, she finds out that she didn't make the cast in a campus production she had her heart set on, was totally invested in. It was a really really sad morning. At noon she gets her list. From the 5, the top 3 cut her. She was left with her bottom 2, they had been her bottom 2 all week.

All of her friends did fine. She decided not to go to prefs that night....so she dropped. Between not making the cast and getting cut from all but her bottom 2 houses this confident, beautfiul girl was too sad to make herself go. Who can blame her?

As her mother who is hours away, I am at a loss for what to do....and at a bigger loss to understand how this could have happened. I so want an explanation...was there a mistake of some kind? Who would not want this child?

I understand that this is your daughter that we're talking about and you think she is great.

With that said, as a sorority alumna yourself, I am sure you understand that every sorority has it's own reasons for cutting or pledging someone.

As such, those decisions are private and theirs alone. It's likely that there was no mistake, but just the indivdual chapter's choices, which they are entitled to.

Also, please remember that you were not with her every step of the recruitment process, nor were you in the rooms to witness her interactions with sorority members. It's possible that she is great "on paper" but did not relate well to those chapters.

I understand that she is sad, and you are sad, but she indeed made a choice to drop out.

That is entirely different from going all the way through and not receiving a bid.

She has every right to care whether she's in one of her "top 3," but when you choose to forgo attending your pref parties, you miss out on potentially finding a home. It's part of the process.

I'm sorry she feels that way and that you're sad for her, but that's the way it goes.