rushing again

dancergrl · #1 10-19-2006, 02:14 PM

I was pressured (dirty rush) into joining a house. I did not want to appear rude or ungrateful and i wanted it to work out, however, now i am an initiated member of a house where i do not like the people in it. I want to disaffiliate, however, if i do is there any way whatsoever that i can rush again? Greek life is big on campus and I would like to find a sorority where i belong, this house is not a match for me, the girls are weird and kinda mean. any advice would be great. thnks!

Drolefille · #2 10-19-2006, 02:15 PM

Assuming you're in an NPC sorority and you want to rush other NPC sororities, the answer is no. Once initiated you can never go back.

33girl · #3 10-19-2006, 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dancergrl

I was pressured (dirty rush) into joining a house. I did not want to appear rude or ungrateful and i wanted it to work out, however, now i am an initiated member of a house where i do not like the people in it. I want to disaffiliate, however, if i do is there any way whatsoever that i can rush again? Greek life is big on campus and I would like to find a sorority where i belong, this house is not a match for me, the girls are weird and kinda mean. any advice would be great. thnks!

Being "dirty rushed" does happen. However, if the manner in which you were rushed upset you, why on earth did you stay the whole way through pledging and initiation?

Try talking to your pledgemistress or big sister about your concerns and see if it can be worked out.

AChiOhSnap · #4 10-19-2006, 05:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dancergrl

I was pressured (dirty rush) into joining a house. I did not want to appear rude or ungrateful and i wanted it to work out, however, now i am an initiated member of a house where i do not like the people in it. I want to disaffiliate, however, if i do is there any way whatsoever that i can rush again? Greek life is big on campus and I would like to find a sorority where i belong, this house is not a match for me, the girls are weird and kinda mean. any advice would be great. thnks!

Echoing what others have said, why on earth would you go through a new member process and initiate into a sorority where the girls are weird and mean?

Your choices are: disaffiliate and join a local sorority that will take former NPC members, disaffiliate and remain independent, or try to make the best of things right where you are. It is not possible to join another NPC organization once you've been initiated into one.

AGDLynn · #5 10-19-2006, 05:34 PM

I have no idea which NPC group you joined but just remember that the makeup of a chapter can change with a pledge class or 2. Those who were once mean and at the bottom can change and be extremely close and number one.

Talk to your pledge class members and see if they feel the same...and do something about it!!

If you truly don't think it is for you, then perhaps disaffliation may be better...but remember the NPC org is made up of more than just those members. While I may not have instantly loved some of my collegiate chapter sisters, I haven't found an alumne athat I didn't like/love.

dancergrl · #6 10-19-2006, 05:35 PM

well i just kept trying to give it more of a chance until it was too late. i feel trapped now! i really do regret not dropping when i had the chance.

dancergrl · #7 10-19-2006, 05:37 PM

i wanted it to work and it ddnt, does this mean i can never join a house where i would better fit in?

epchick · #8 10-19-2006, 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dancergrl

i wanted it to work and it ddnt, does this mean i can never join a house where i would better fit in?

If you joined an NPC sorority...then no.

LPIDelta · #9 10-19-2006, 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dancergrl

i wanted it to work and it ddnt, does this mean i can never join a house where i would better fit in?

Are you in a chapter affiliated with NPC?

dancergrl · #10 10-19-2006, 05:41 PM

yes its npc

Tom Earp · #11 10-19-2006, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dancergrl

i wanted it to work and it ddnt, does this mean i can never join a house where i would better fit in?

Yes, that is exactly what it means.
Either make the best of it or drop out.

Make change or drop out.

That is your options.

smiley21 · #12 10-19-2006, 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dancergrl

I was pressured (dirty rush) into joining a house. I did not want to appear rude or ungrateful and i wanted it to work out, however, now i am an initiated member of a house where i do not like the people in it. I want to disaffiliate, however, if i do is there any way whatsoever that i can rush again? Greek life is big on campus and I would like to find a sorority where i belong, this house is not a match for me, the girls are weird and kinda mean. any advice would be great. thnks!

I am sorry, but I have a problem with this. When you say 'pressured into joining a house', it sounds like you had a gun to your head or something. You say that you did not want to be rude, so does that mean that you did not want to join the house in the first place? Then why did you? I am not asking you to expose your business, but I do not understand how you could just let them talk you into joining. I can understand if you wanted to give them a try. But initiation = commitment. Pledging is not just about learning the sorority history. It is about knowing your chapter sisters and figuring out whether you want this for the long haul.
I told my chapter sisters that I believe joining a sorority is like marriage with pledging being the engagement. Make sure you are willing to commit BEFORE the 'wedding day/initiation'.
I am sorry if it seems like I am attacking you cause I am not. When a sorority wants you to join, they are giving you the option to decide if it is what you want. But I know that we are pass that point cause you already initiated. And I am sorry that it is too late to join another group. There are many reasons why that is the policy.
I agree with the others in trying to talk to your pledge sisters, but if you are really uncomfortable with them, then you can always join non Greek groups on campus.

kddani · #13 10-20-2006, 08:10 AM

Let this be a life lesson to you to fully investigate things before signing your name to the bottom line.

Not only did you have the chance to say "no" or "i'm not ready yet" before accepting the bid, but you also had your entire pledge period to decide whether or not the group was something you wanted to be a part of.

Under these circumstances, you're not going to get much sympathy here.

kddani · #14 10-20-2006, 08:16 AM

As AChiOSnap said, this person posted the exact same thing back in April (actually, she posted it twice, the first thread she got lots of excellent advice in and didn't want to hear it. That thread disappeared, and another thread asking the same thing was posted)

Here's a link to that thread:
http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ad.php?t=77622

Drolefille · #15 10-20-2006, 09:12 AM

OP, you will and are getting no sympathy whatsoever. I agree that you're acting weird in that you posted before and didn't listen. (And i find it hard to believe your roommate has the same problem.) If you hate it so much, disaffiliate.