is there any hope?

SockPuppet3 · #1 03-07-2006, 01:35 PM

I don't want to reveal my sorority or my school, you'll understand why.

Mods, if this would be more appropriate in another forum, please move as you see fit.

My campus has six sororities. Two of them are very strong (they always make total, they are invited by fraternities to participate in socials, etc.). Two are somewhat strong, but their reputation has been diminishing for several years. The remaining two constantly seem to struggle (they never make total, even with COB; they are rarely invited to mix with fraternities; etc.).

I am in one of the latter mentioned sororities. While we have an incredible sisterhood, we really don't have much respect on campus. I know one of the reasons behind this is that we're seen as the "dumpy" girls. We have women who wear size 14 or larger, women who don't wear much make-up, etc.

We have struggled for years. My older sister went to school here, and was a member of another sorority, but remembers how bad my sorority's reputation was 10 years ago. Unfortunately, it hasn't gotten any better.

She was so disappointed that I chose to sign my bid card when she found out which sorority I had chosen. I ranked it 2nd (out of 3) after pref. She thinks I might have even been offered a bid from my top choice (which is in the first category I mentioned), but was extended a bid from this group because I actually ranked it 2nd. There were two people, including me, in my pledge class.

I guess where I'm going with this is, at what point does the school reconsider how many groups it will continue to recognize? How long will it let these two struggling chapters continue to struggle? Or, are the sororities themselves the ones who decide whether or not to continue?

I love my sisters, but we really do have a pathetic reputation here. As awful as it sounds, I'm looking forward to graduation so I can become alum and affiliate with an alumnae group and not my chapter specifically.

I know this sounds bad. I also realize that part of it has to be my fault for not finding SOME way to improve our campus image. But, can you really say to sisters, "You really should lose 50 pounds," or, "Why don't you brush your hair and put on some make-up."?

Please, any help you can provide will be appreciated. I think my chapter's future looks pretty dismal. I'd like to find some kind of way to keep us around, but with a much better image.

DSTCHAOS · #2 03-07-2006, 01:37 PM

What makes you a sock puppet?

SockPuppet3 · #3 03-07-2006, 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DSTCHAOS
What makes you a sock puppet?

I have another username, but didn't want to post from it in order to protect the identity of my sorority (nationally and my chapter specifically).

DSTCHAOS · #4 03-07-2006, 01:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SockPuppet3
I have another username, but didn't want to post from it in order to protect the identity of my sorority (nationally and my chapter specifically).

I believe chapter reputation and "saving dying chapters" have both been discussed numerous times on GC.

More detailed answers to your questions would come from your chapter discussing its future with administration. Schedule a chapter meeting in which you all have an all-out honest discussion with one another. Then go to administration after you all decide that you really want to save your chapter.

33girl · #5 03-07-2006, 01:58 PM

You probably should have picked something else to distinguish you from the assiness that is SockPuppet2.

The school's not going to do anything, as long as you continue to meet requirements for a student org. And when there are RSOs with 2 people, they're not going to care if a sorority is on equal footing with other sororities or not.

You CAN help people to improve their appearance - if you word it correctly. Have you thought about starting an aerobics class or having someone from Mary Kay or Avon come to do makeovers? Have you brought up the topic, in a constructive way? Is there anyone else who feels the same way?

The other possibility, of course, is that everyone else in the sorority is happy with where they are, and could care less about socials with fraternities or campus image. In that case, you should probably go inactive or terminate, because you're banging your head against a wall and you'll be miserable for the rest of your college career. Plus, you can't pull someone up if you're being negative.

The girls in the "top" sororities have their own set of problems, too - don't think that they don't.

SockPuppet3 · #6 03-07-2006, 02:00 PM

When I signed my card, I didn't have as low an opinion of the group as I do now. Frankly, during recruitment, they looked much more presentable than they do the rest of the year. And, I still like the girls. They're all nice, genuine, caring, etc. But, for the most part, the image our group projects is what I'm most frustrated with.

DSTCHAOS · #7 03-07-2006, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SockPuppet3
When I signed my card, I didn't have as low an opinion of the group as I do now. Frankly, during recruitment, they looked much more presentable than they do the rest of the year. And, I still like the girls. They're all nice, genuine, caring, etc. But, for the most part, the image our group projects is what I'm most frustrated with.

Do you think you are being superficial?

Is it that they aren't portraying the stereotypically "girly and obsessed with looks" sorority image that you think they should?

If you want to focus on physical and mental health, do that. That's a productive venture. If you just want them to fit into some type of mold and fulfill what YOU think a sorority girl looks and acts like, that's petty and you're missing out on what that sorority probably stands for.

CarolinaCutie · #8 03-07-2006, 02:08 PM

I agree with Chaos that you need to have a group meeting about the subject.

But also, you have to realize that what you can do with the members you already have is limited. Recruitment is how you'll turn it all around. You will need to convince your chapter to strategically choose members who will IMPROVE your reputation. Formal recruitment will likely not help you in this regard, but you can do wonders with COB. Particularly focus on getting those cute, normal girls who slipped through the cracks in FR (perhaps victims of bid promising or dirty rushing from those top sororities?). They want to be in sororities- how will you convince them that being a member of your chapter is better than being independent?

Then get their friends to join. Cute girls have cute friends. DO NOT sacrifice acceptability in all other areas just because a girl is cute- this will set you back. Go after freshmen girls who may not realize the reputation your chapter has.

You have to systematically improve your chapter pledge class by pledge class. But first, everyone has to be on board... and there's probably plenty of girls in your chapter who like things just the way they are. This will be your problem. They'll say that they don't WANT to be members of the "cookie-cutter" chapters, that they prefer to focus on the relationships, that they don't care about mixers with fraternities and campus reputations. This is a lie. This sounds harsh, but a lot of ugly girls are afraid of cute girls. You'll have to figure out a way to show them that a girl can be beautiful and popular with men AND still be a good sister and chapter member.

HotDamnImAPhiMu · #9 03-07-2006, 02:09 PM

So......... basically they're not pretty enough?

DSTCHAOS · #10 03-07-2006, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by HotDamnImAPhiMu
So......... basically they're not pretty enough?

I think they need to lose weight and some grooming.

I wonder if SockPuppet3 needs the same but is also in denial.

Dionysus · #11 03-07-2006, 02:15 PM

I would say that you all should be more careful who you all recruit next semester. Your sorority should try to rush girls who are different from the "undesirable" girls. This will pose another problem though...the more desirable girls probably will not want to join your sorority. But, there should be some exceptions. Focus on those exceptions, keep them happy. And those more desirable girls MIGHT attract even more desirable girls in the future. This won't happen overnight and it might not even work at all, but this is one of the few options you all have.

*edited*Ahhh nevermind, CarolinaCutie said the same thing I said, but she said it better.

CarolinaCutie · #12 03-07-2006, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mcellpe
let the Barbie doll sororities do whatever, and focus on being yourselves, and being proud of yourselves.

My 2 cents...

This is SO FRUSTRATING to me. Just because a chapter is filled with beautiful women does NOT mean that that's all they have going for them. There are tons of successful chapters all over the country who have gorgeous girls that are doing GREAT things. They are not the top chapters because of looks alone. Sorority chapters made up of beautiful girls who have nothing else going for them fail. It's insulting to refer to a chapter as a Barbie doll sorority when you know nothing about them. The other chapter is clearly more successful at recruiting well-rounded members- appearance is a part of that.

mulattogyrl · #13 03-07-2006, 02:21 PM

DSTCHAOS · #14 03-07-2006, 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CarolinaCutie
This is SO FRUSTRATING to me. Just because a chapter is filled with beautiful women does NOT mean that that's all they have going for them. There are tons of successful chapters all over the country who have gorgeous girls that are doing GREAT things. They are not the top chapters because of looks alone. Sorority chapters made up of beautiful girls who have nothing else going for them fail. It's insulting to refer to a chapter as a Barbie doll sorority when you know nothing about them. The other chapter is clearly more successful at recruiting well-rounded members- appearance is a part of that.

Let's be honest and admit that there are campuses and chapters that are completely obsessed with looks. They judge the top organizations by who the beautiful and popular kids are, as well as how social these people are. Kind of like high school cliques.

I know georgeous and handsome chapters who just so happen to be that way. The members are campus and community leaders whose beautiful looks come second. But, when threads like THIS one come up, it highlights how much some people allow looks to supercede more important factors.

kddani · #15 03-07-2006, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 33girl
having someone from Mary Kay or Avon come to do makeovers?

Dear God no. Then you'll have a bunch of overweight women with bad makeup. You'll become the Mimi Bobeck sorority.

I agree on the makeovers thing, becaues it can be fun, but how about going to a department store and scheduling them, or you might be able to have a representative or two from the Clinique counter come to an event and give demonstrations, etc. They do do stuff like that.