Should I Re-rush/Colonize
I rushed in the fall and dropped out because I felt like formal recruitment was something I was neither prepared for nor could adapt to. At the end of the first night, I was called back to 2/8 chapters, and with three days remaining, I didn't want to face any more rejection. Yes, it was great that someone saw me as their potential sister, but I just didn't think I'd make it to the end. I struggled with the new dress code that the Panhellenic Council at my university implemented this year -- we we're required to wear "casual brunch" outfits, i.e. pumps, pearls, and pastels -- and I tried my best to conform, but ultimately ended up feeling like I was grossly misrepresenting myself. My parents are going through a nasty separation at home, and with having to reconsider my future as a student at the university, I felt overwhelmed and dropped.
With all of that being said, I would still love to join a sorority. My options during informal are to rush an established chapter or join the colonizing chapter. I have an older sister at home who's my best friend, and now two years into college of five total, I still haven't found a bond like the one I have with her here at school. I didn't rush my freshman year because I didn't feel confident and I didn't feel like I had much to offer a sorority. I wanted to find myself first and get involved in groups and gain some experience. My friends are my family, and with my own family breaking apart I want to always have people I can support and rely on, and who can do the same for me. I think the colony would be a good option, because they don't have a reputation on campus that I feel like I would have to mold myself to, and I know I can step into a leadership role right away. If 6/8 chapters didn't see me wearing their letters, I don't know what I'm a good candidate for, so I think my options here are really limited and this may be the best course of action.
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