Staying Over at my Boyfriend's Fraternity House - Page 6

AXORissa · #76 12-05-2003, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by GeekyPenguin
I don't even think it's a north/south issue - I think it's a class issue.

i wholehartedly disagree.

DGqueen17 · #77 12-05-2003, 04:59 PM

I think it all comes down to the person. If it's something that you're ashamed of doing then don't do it.

absolutuscchick · #78 12-05-2003, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by GeekyPenguin
Excuse me for thinking it's totally okay to sleep in the same bed with a guy before I get an engagement ring. I have sisters on this board who are virgins who have spent the night at a fraternity house. You can stay there for completely innocent reasons, like bad weather or being too drunk to drive. Oh wait, that means I was being a bad sorority girl and drinking?

I definitely agree!! I've definitely spent at least ten nights in frat houses and never once was I having sex...sometimes it was just REALLY late and the guy didn't want to walk me home in the very scary ghetto around USC so I slept in his bed with him, and sometimes we just passed out, sometimes just wanted to spoon....

phimuandfries · #79 12-05-2003, 05:37 PM

i will be honest, i wish more girls and guys had more respect for sex, and saving it for marriage, but i know that's not how it is. and i respect any sexually active person that is responsible. But don't yall think it is sad that in 2003 we are still worried about the girl's reputation. That the girl that has a one night stand at a fraternity house is still looked down on, but no one even mentioned the guy's reputation...

absolutuscchick · #80 12-05-2003, 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by phimuandfries
i will be honest, i wish more girls and guys had more respect for sex, and saving it for marriage, but i know that's not how it is. and i respect any sexually active person that is responsible. But don't yall think it is sad that in 2003 we are still worried about the girl's reputation. That the girl that has a one night stand at a fraternity house is still looked down on, but no one even mentioned the guy's reputation...

I agree 100% with what you said!!

#81 12-05-2003, 05:49 PM

right on, phimuandfries!

damasa · #82 12-05-2003, 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by phimuandfries
i will be honest, i wish more girls and guys had more respect for sex, and saving it for marriage, but i know that's not how it is. and i respect any sexually active person that is responsible. But don't yall think it is sad that in 2003 we are still worried about the girl's reputation. That the girl that has a one night stand at a fraternity house is still looked down on, but no one even mentioned the guy's reputation...

I understand your stance on the whole his/her reputation but I had a different question.

Why is it that if people are sexually active they don't "respect" the act of sex?

See that makes no sense to me simply because people choose to do it they don't respect it? Maybe they respect it more by choosing to do it?

The act of sex shouldn't be talked about as it's some type of degrading act because it's not. And I think a lot of people who are sexually active do respect the act and sometimes they may respect it more because they actually know what it's like.

/End rant

phimuandfries · #83 12-05-2003, 06:08 PM

i know that many people that are sexually active do respect sex... and i shouldn't say that it needs to be saved for marriage. i meant that people don't respect sex, in that they will have sex purely for the physical gratification, and not think of it as something that is emotional and that can be spiritual. i didn't mean to sound like anyone in a sexual relationship outside of marriage didn't respect it. sorry

Bama_Alumna · #84 12-05-2003, 06:08 PM

GeekyPenguin, I'm not sure what you meant by "a class issue," but I agree that it is not a north/south issue.

I also agree that if the young lady who began this post were planning to rush at a school like my alma mater or LSU, shacking in the frat house wouldn't be the best idea. Around here, you never know who's watching.

However, it is up to her to decide if 6 weeks is enough time to date before sleeping over, whether or not anything sexual is going to happen if she sleeps over, and if she feels comfortable seeing her boyfriend's fraternity brothers first thing in the morning.

Personally, I never shacked in a fraternity house. I never wanted to (the smell of stale beer, combined with a lumpy twin bed and an empty pizza box?...no thanks!) But to those questioning the difference between that and an apartment, the main difference between a fraternity house and an apartment is that you don't have 35 other guys standing around (or in the bathroom!) when you wake up in an apartment.

absolutuscchick · #85 12-05-2003, 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Bama_Alumna
combined with a lumpy twin bed

I know alot of guys in frat houses with double/queen size beds!!!

GammaPhiBabe · #86 12-05-2003, 06:24 PM

Quote:

I know alot of guys in frat houses with double/queen size beds!!!

How may frat guys' bedrooms have you been in, Rachel??

damasa · #87 12-05-2003, 06:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by phimuandfries
i know that many people that are sexually active do respect sex... and i shouldn't say that it needs to be saved for marriage. i meant that people don't respect sex, in that they will have sex purely for the physical gratification, and not think of it as something that is emotional and that can be spiritual. i didn't mean to sound like anyone in a sexual relationship outside of marriage didn't respect it. sorry

Ah, no need to be sorry you have your opinion and I respect it. I was just trying to get another view (which I did get thank you).

SmartBlondeGPhB · #88 12-05-2003, 06:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by damasa
I understand your stance on the whole his/her reputation but I had a different question.

Why is it that if people are sexually active they don't "respect" the act of sex?

See that makes no sense to me simply because people choose to do it they don't respect it? Maybe they respect it more by choosing to do it?

The act of sex shouldn't be talked about as it's some type of degrading act because it's not. And I think a lot of people who are sexually active do respect the act and sometimes they may respect it more because they actually know what it's like.

/End rant

Now THAt I would have to agree with! Very well said.

absolutuscchick · #89 12-05-2003, 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by GammaPhiBabe
How may frat guys' bedrooms have you been in, Rachel??

Too many to count!!!!

Munchkin03 · #90 12-05-2003, 08:31 PM

Man, I go to class for a few hours and see what happens?

Caitie, you've gotten excellent advice. I know you said you have 3.5 years left in college, which I take that to mean that you're a freshman. This is one of many inherently adult decisions you'll have to make. If you're still unsure about whether or not to stay over at the fraternity, it can't hurt to wait a few weeks--until you get to know the guys a little more and befriend some Greek women around campus to find out how they feel about shacking in regards to standards issues. I know my campus was super-liberal and it wouldn't have made a big deal (I am living proof!), in fact it may have helped during recruitment, especially if sisters were doing the same thing. I'd just say don't do it before you're ready--if that's six weeks, six hours, or six years. I spent the night w/ Mr Munch (who's GDI, by the way) the first night we were together--because that's when I was ready. Please don't let anyone make you feel guilty (AHEM!) about making a decision that YOU have to make alone.

M'03 (former frat shacker, current alum)

I *heart* sugar and spice, GeekyPenguin, damasa, and breathesgelatin.