Dating Greek Men - Page 6

gammazetagrl · #76 05-04-2001, 02:08 AM

I guess there are both pros and cons in dating a Greek man. (I cannot say about GDI's, although I am friends with a lot of them, I've never been involved with one). Like most of you guys already said, they understand the commitment you have to your organization:time constraints (like those chapter meetings that can take FOREVER),financial issues, responsibilities, etc. You guys are on the same boat when you're talking, like if you guys talk about some aspects of your pledge semester you can see where one another is coming from...and of course, you guys never run out of formals,semi formals, etc to go to (and i love dressing up.Anyway, the negative aspect in my experience with my boyfriend who is a Sammy (in a different university) is that we just have to trust each other when we have our own separate mixers or functions to go to. We cannot be there to watch each other but thank god we love and trust each other enough not to do anything despite all the "temptation". I would say that a Greek long distance romance could be slightly different than a typical long distance romance coz there are more "complications" like groupies, etc. But i think in terms of the guy's character, it's really up to the guy, coz I've had experiences with other fratboys who were just plain immature, just want some ass, and they were just dogs, i was so ready to give up on greek men...thankfully my bf came along and convinced me that not all greek guys are like that! =)

SigKap · #77 05-09-2001, 10:23 PM

well i am sure no one will read this because my reply is way here at the bottom...sniff sniff sadness. but dating greek men. the only differance i can see is that if you are serious with your greek stud of choice then his whole frat kinda adopts you. meaning that they see you as a little sister and you tend to be at his frat house a lot more than you normaly would. my boyfriend is a sigma nu and whenever they have parties and get togethers i am always over there. it's kinda nice though because when they have big philanthropy events i know everyone!

all guys are the same though...immature and weird

KillarneyRose · #78 05-10-2001, 04:19 PM

One thing that I remember from college, at least at my school, was that if you dated one guy from a certain fraternity you couldn't date another guy from the same fraternity even after you broke up with the first one. Girls who did this were considered to be "(Insert name of fraternity here) pass-arounds". Now that I look back at this, it is pretty weird but at the time it made sense I guess.

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~@~Tracy~@~
Proud to be a Delta-Z

shida25 · #79 05-13-2001, 04:57 PM

Well, I have dated a Alpha Phi Alpha and he was no different than the non greek men I have dated. I am not in a sorority yet but by the grace of god I will be come spring 2002. I prefer my boyfriend I have now, who is a non greek. It really does not matter.

FlorDeMayo · #80 05-13-2001, 05:57 PM

I think dating greek men is different in some way because they undertand the hard work and the meaning of sisterhood and brotherhood a little bit more. I wish at my campus we had more fraternities because I would love to find me an Awesome Greek Man
:-D Hey if ya know where to find a good one in GA let me know O:-)
ZL
Flor De Mayo

FlorDeMayo · #81 05-13-2001, 05:58 PM

I think dating greek men is different in some way because they undertand the hard work and the meaning of sisterhood and brotherhood a little bit more. I wish at my campus we had more fraternities because I would love to find me an Awesome Greek Man
:-D Hey if ya know where to find a good one in GA let me know O:-)
ZL
Flor De Mayo

AlphaChiGirl · #82 05-13-2001, 07:53 PM

Okay...here's a scenario. One of my really good friends is dating someone in a fraternity. She complained about how she couldn't know the secrets. She felt as if the existence of those secrets put the fraternity in a higher position than their 2-month relationship, since they "tell eachother everything".
I tried to explain it to her that he was a brother before she came into his life, he'll be a brother after her. She got a little mad at me, saying that I was saying this from a Greek viewpoint. Well, duh! I am especially impatient because I'm currently dating a GDI (of a year and so) who DOES NOT CARE about my ritual...meaning he's not trying to know about it...he has enough respect for it not to inquire. I guess it comes down to maturity and one's sense of security in the relationship.

My question is...have any of you who dated independent had problems with a significant other who wanted to know your ritual, pledging activities, or whatnot? I know I would not be having that go on for more than a day in my relationships. But, that's just me.

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Quote:

"Don't tell me I've been wrong...don't tell me all the magic's gone."--Liz Phair

DeltaGirly · #83 05-14-2001, 04:45 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by SigKap:
well i am sure no one will read this because my reply is way here at the bottom...sniff sniff sadness. but dating greek men. the only differance i can see is that if you are serious with your greek stud of choice then his whole frat kinda adopts you. meaning that they see you as a little sister and you tend to be at his frat house a lot more than you normaly would. my boyfriend is a sigma nu and whenever they have parties and get togethers i am always over there. it's kinda nice though because when they have big philanthropy events i know everyone! all guys are the same though...immature and weird

SigKap
I totally agree with you! My boyfriend is Sigma Nu also, and his whole house has definitely sort of adopted me. I think it's great because you get to actually know all of your boy's brothers. And as for dating Greek over Non-Greek, I think Greek is better just because they seem to be better at dealing with the time a sorority takes up and they seem to respect rituals a bit more. Not all GDI's have a problem, but from my experiences, my Greek guy is much better with all of it!

dchi_pride · #84 05-15-2001, 02:20 AM

WOW-Great issue. Sorry if this is a sorority only forumn, but I got to put my two cents in. I'm a Delta Chi at Western Michigan University and I feel that there are not as many good girls in the greek scene as I anticipated when I rushed. I'm 25 now (I had to transfer and lost a lot of credits in the process) and I'm a senior. At my age, I am just looking for a nice woman to settle down with, not marry at this time, but to be faithful with and try to make things mature. My cousin was a Delta Zeta here in the mid 80s and met here husband through Delta Chi, kind of a cinderalla story when they tell it. It seems hard at times to believe that we exist. I have been burned by my share of women in the past, but dont's give up! There are greek guys that feel the same. I wish all you girs the best of luck!

-Much love to the greek sisters,
-dchi_pride

Carrieboberry · #85 05-15-2001, 07:16 PM

I admit it, I'm in love with my Greek man.

He is the best, and I think that his experiences at his fraternity have made him into a TRUE GENTLEMAN.

He's amazing and so thoughtful, and he understands why sisterhood is so important to me! I don't believe that non-greeks CANNOT understand, I mean...we were all non-greek at one point in our lives too! Maybe it's just coincidence/bad luck, but most of the non-greeks I dated were B*$@holes and did not treat me like the goddess I am.

But I believe that particularly in college, the more you have in common with someone, especially if your fratnernity/sorority is as important to you as it is to me...it helps to have someone who understands that inner circle.

dzrose93 · #86 05-16-2001, 09:57 AM

I've dated both Greek and non-Greek men. I don't think the level of immaturity is any greater in one than the other. I can say that I definitely had more trouble with my non-Greek guys. They resented the time I spent with my sisters and one even tried to forbid me to go to socials with fraternities! When I ran for President, he got really angry because he didn't want the sorority to monopolize my time.

My non-Greek boyfriends just didn't understand the point of Greek organizations having never been in one themselves, and they couldn't see why I took everything so seriously. Looking back, I can see why they felt the way they did, but it still doesn't excuse it.

Dating Greek men, I know that I have a common bond with them and that they understand the importance of sorority obligations. None of the Greek guys I've dated have ever batted an eye when I had to cut a date short because of a philanthropy event early the next morning, or cancel a date when a sister needed me.

PrincessELG · #87 05-16-2001, 03:04 PM

Hello Sorors,

I just wanted to comment on this topic now that it has come to the top again. I am a true blue, or should I say red, fan of those oh so sexy noble men of Kappa Alpha Psi. I mean I love my Alpha brothers but there is something about them Nupes that make we want to keep coming back. I enjoy dating them and I enjoy their friendship. And maybe one day I'll be blessed to marry one. I know the letters don't make the man but their choice in letters certainly sways my vote.

Princess

gammazetagrl · #88 05-21-2001, 06:11 PM

oh well I dunno if i should post a new topic for this but yeah, the greek man (Sammy) that i mentioned in my previous post in this topic? well we broke up *sob*.rather, he broke up with me. it only seemed like it was yesterday he got down on one knee and sang the Sammys sweetheart song, and I think I was hoping that this was all only a bad dream but it's reality...he felt that the feelings weren't mutual anymore and that his feelings for me weren't as strong as mine for him now. i mean, i dated other guys but this greek guy has been the first and only guy i had an actual relationship with and although rightnow I am totally lost and lonely, (like a part of me died)all i can say is it was a beautiful six months and not once did we get to an argument and like you fellow greek women's men, understood my obligations to my organization. im just glad that in many ways he has been a part of my life and was able to touch it unlike other guys. no one can take away the memories we've had, from the formals to parties, to phone calls and even just holding hands while driving around. well, he made it clear he wanted to still remain friends so i guess that's good *tries to smile*...although i know he's always been a great and nice guy, i know his fraternity has a big role in shaping the mature and caring man he is now. He will always be my friend and vice versa, and Im glad we're still gonna be a part of each other's lives. I could only thank him for everything that we shared not only in the during the relationship but our friendship beforehand. Right now fellow Greek sisters I'm just in mourning and crying out of loneliness, emptiness and pain. If any of you guys have any advice on how to get over breakups, please email me at princess_chunli@hotmail.com. I would really appreciate it how you guys were able to move on...coz right now im just having a hard time dealing with it, even though i know it could be worse (at least he still wants to be friends)this guy is my first love and first boyfriend and so i have no previous experience with heartbreak....

p.s. one thing im afraid of though...is the fact that since he's not mine anymore and when he comes back to school he'd be going to mixers and stuff, meet new people, and ill be doing the same thing, and i might even be jealous of the girls that he meets..coz i don't think im gonna be social in parties for awhile when i get back to school.

If you guys can really email me it would help a lot. thanks for reading my long post.

James · #89 05-21-2001, 11:19 PM

Gammazetagrl,

That is a VERY mature reaction to a break-up . . . I take my hat off to you.

lvandenb · #90 05-21-2001, 11:36 PM

cheer up girl! I'm sure things will get better! I've personally never had a boyfriend, which I stress over, even though my friends say that I'm lucky because I've never had to deal with a breakup or cheating boyfriends, etc., but as silly as it sounds, I've always wanted to date a greek man. I just want the total fantasy story, like the ones on TLC. I know that some of you must watch the wedding story on TLC. Anyway, I want to get lavaliered, have the candlelight ceremony with my sisters, pinned, the whole she-bang! A lot of my sisters laugh at me when I go on about this, but I just think it would be so cool to one day marry a greek man, and we'd have our greek stuff hanging in our den in our house, and our kids would be legacies...oh...the perfect story. Hehehe. Oh, by the way, what is a Sammy? I'm assuming it's sigma alpha something.