Race & Sororities

WOW.
I love the fact that you have the audacity to explain my life to me in the way that you see it.
I sense some bitterness and animosity, and I really doubt it has anything to do with my post.
You're entitled to your opinion, and I'm entitled to mine.
You can think what you want about me and "some people get angry when you say that, or deny it to the fullest, but that doesn't mean it isn't true."
If you thought I was some clueless little girl looking for justification or sympathy then you're wrong.
I'm a strong young woman with a drive to succeed.
I am interested in GLOs in general.
I simply asked a question. ( and yes it was a question )
It was not a statement of my general ideas and/or hopes in a sad attempt to obtain a response conducive to my dreams.
And as for racism being present in the South, I agree. I know. I live here. I also know that racism isn't just something shown by white people... (hint hint)
I know who has accepted me, and you CANNOT sit there and tell me that my life experiences are BS when you DO NOT know me.
My mother (who is black) experienced the same thing.
She went to the same high school.
The people she went to school with parented the people I go to school with.
It seems that some people prefer the stereotypical black person, and that's sad.
Now you can say whatever you'd like in response to this, and frankly, I don't care.
In my opinion, you're not here to help. You're here to justify your beliefs, as you think I am.
I wish you all the best.

PS.
rudeness a good look for anyone.

Originally Posted by deepimpact2

Your story isn't unique. And yes, in my opinion it sounds like you simply want to join a white sorority and you came here to have someone tell you that they won't discriminate against you. Personally I think you may be setting yourself up for heartache. From my experience black and bi-racial women have a difficult time joining white sororities....especially in the South. Some people get angry when you say that, or deny it to the fullest, but that doesn't mean it isn't true. Racism is alive and well and in these situations it is often hidden. It's done in a very subtle and genteel way.

As far as your claims about not being accepted by the African-American community, I think I will stay away from that. Suffice it to say I think it's BS and your explanation kind of gives that away.

At any rate, you should check out ALL of the sororities...including the black ones....instead of just automatically shying away from them.

[GAgalBamabound]

( going back to just reading ,now )

[deepimpact2]

Originally Posted by UMryanne13

It seems that some people prefer the stereotypical black person, and that's sad.

.

So I'm curious now...what is the "stereotypical black person?" It's interesting that you brought this up because I heard this kind of thing said quite often while Obama was running for president...that he isn't the typical black person. I always wondered what people meant by that.

[sigmadiva]

Originally Posted by UMryanne13

Hi
I'm a bi-racial (black/white) female attending Ole Miss in the fall. I want to rush, but I don't want to limit myself to historically black sororities. Is race a deciding factor in most sororities? Are any of you members of sororities with members of a race other than the majority?

Any advice or information will be greatly appreciated.

as you can see i never said i didn't want to join a black sororities...
i said i don't want to limit myself.
as in i want a chance at more than 4 organizations.

but to give you a better understanding of why i would like to try for more than just those 4:

i've always gone to predominantly white schools.
the majority of my friends are white (the black kids thought i was weird because i "acted white." but that's an inside issue?)
i've always been myself.
i've always acted the same... i uphold the things my BLACK family taught me...

so i can assure you i'm perfectly fine with my race... i know who i am... but i've never been one to sit around and follow the norm.

[please don't take this as me being rude because that's not my intention... but as a whole (i'm not saying all), i've not been accepted within the african-american community because of my PERSONALITY...]
i want to be somewhere that i'll fit in and not have to monitor my natural personality...

I think that your reasons for wanting to join a NPC org are a bit weak, but they are your reasons and I respect them.

And to that, given your background, I know of young biracial kids who wanted to join a NPHC org because they wanted a more historically Black experience. So, it can go either way.

At this point, the best way to help yourself is to get off GC and any other greek-org related web site. I've seen NPC pnms chances ruined because they came on here and revealed too much info about themselves. You may not think it can happen, but it can. I'm always amazed at the GC sleuths who figure out who / where people are (in terms of the schools they attend) and the outcome for that pnm is not always positive. And, these pnms, I presume, are White!!

I do hope that you are able to find the sisterhood that you feel is best for you. Just don't limit yourself purely based on racial reasons. Once you get to your university and start to meet more people, more diverse people, you may be surprised. You may end up in a NPC and if that is your desire, I hope you are successful.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

At this point, the best way to help yourself is to get off GC and any other greek-org related web site. I've seen NPC pnms chances ruined because they came on here and revealed too much info about themselves. You may not think it can happen, but it can. I'm always amazed at the GC sleuths who figure out who / where people are (in terms of the schools they attend).

YES.

It's just NEVER a good idea to put too much info about yourself out here. I'd advise you ladies to exercise some discretion here.

I suggest watching BET's College Hill...
or any other show with black people as the main focus.
that's what most people view the black community to be.
and sadly, sometimes it's not far from the truth.
just as a lot of white people are viewed in a negative manner by other races.

Originally Posted by deepimpact2

So I'm curious now...what is the "stereotypical black person?" It's interesting that you brought this up because I heard this kind of thing said quite often while Obama was running for president...that he isn't the typical black person. I always wondered what people meant by that.

you two are both right.
thank you.
i'm done

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

YES.

It's just NEVER a good idea to put too much info about yourself out here. I'd advise you ladies to exercise some discretion here.

[sigmadiva]

Originally Posted by UMryanne13

WOW.
I love the fact that you have the audacity to explain my life to me in the way that you see it.
I sense some bitterness and animosity, and I really doubt it has anything to do with my post.
You're entitled to your opinion, and I'm entitled to mine.
You can think what you want about me and "some people get angry when you say that, or deny it to the fullest, but that doesn't mean it isn't true."
If you thought I was some clueless little girl looking for justification or sympathy then you're wrong.
I'm a strong young woman with a drive to succeed.
I am interested in GLOs in general.
I simply asked a question. ( and yes it was a question )
It was not a statement of my general ideas and/or hopes in a sad attempt to obtain a response conducive to my dreams.
And as for racism being present in the South, I agree. I know. I live here. I also know that racism isn't just something shown by white people... (hint hint)
I know who has accepted me, and you CANNOT sit there and tell me that my life experiences are BS when you DO NOT know me.
My mother (who is black) experienced the same thing.
She went to the same high school.
The people she went to school with parented the people I go to school with.
It seems that some people prefer the stereotypical black person, and that's sad.
Now you can say whatever you'd like in response to this, and frankly, I don't care.
In my opinion, you're not here to help. You're here to justify your beliefs, as you think I am.
I wish you all the best.

PS.
rudeness a good look for anyone.

First, you came to us, so to speak. So you opened the issue, not us.

All we know about your life is what you have told us and the vein that you have told us. Basically, you said that you identify more with Whites than Blacks, and that is fine. The caution that some of us have told you is that given your racial background *and* the university you want to attend *and* the greek org you want to join *and* the area of the country where this school is located is that you may not have the outcome you hope to have.

If you'd said what you said, but stated that you were going to large-commuter university where joining a NPC is not that competitive and/or being greek at that school is not a big deal, then you may have gotten a slightly different response. Heck, I'm not NPC, but I've been on GC long enough to learn this difference.

[sigmadiva]

Originally Posted by UMryanne13

I suggest watching BET's College Hill...
or any other show with black people as the main focus.
that's what most people view the black community to be.
and sadly, sometimes it's not far from the truth.
just as a lot of white people are viewed in a negative manner by other races.

I suggest that you actually get out in the community and personally interact with other Black people. I mean, face to face, real life interactions. You know, where you actually talk to them and really get to know them. Because if BET is your only exposure to Black people, then I can see why you feel the way you do.

And, btw, some of my best friends are White. They really are!

[tld221]

^^^ at the end of the day, you're going to join a chapter that you feel like "yourself." Which could be any org. It sounds like you're willing to keep your options open. You should. And if its all meant to be, the chapter members will feel like they can be "themselves," in the case of this thread, not tiptoe around the race issue.

[deepimpact2]

Originally Posted by UMryanne13

I suggest watching BET's College Hill...
or any other show with black people as the main focus.
that's what most people view the black community to be.
and sadly, sometimes it's not far from the truth.
just as a lot of white people are viewed in a negative manner by other races.

I've never seen the show, so it would be nice if you would provide specific examples.

[SWTXBelle]

Originally Posted by deepimpact2

Would a person who goes around saying that really be stupid or just honest? No offense, but it gets really ridiculous in certain situations when people try to pretend like people really don't know why someone wasn't picked. In many cases it IS racism, but it is that subtle racism that will never actually be acknowledged. In my opinion that is the most dangerous type of racism because there's nothing you can do about it. I would rather deal with the person who is admitting that they turned someone down because of their race than someone who acts all prim and proper and polite while lying through their teeth. And in the case of these types of sororities, they hide behind the membership selection process and often point to other white women who weren't selected as if that really proves anything. No, all white women won't get into the predominately white sororities. I don't think anyone is crazy enough to believe that. However, when you have chapters or entire organizations that never have black members, that tells the story in and of itself because you can't sit there and honestly say that there have NEVER been any qualified black women.

As far as the OP, it sounds like she has other issues going on within herself concerning her racial identity. She doesn't want to join a "black" sorority because she doesn't want to "limit" herself, but now it sounds like she wants to join a predominately white sorority. That's not equally limiting?

Again, you are basing all of this on your instincts or opinion - I will give you a concrete example of why I can sit here and say that sometimes there haven't been any qualified black women going through a NPC recruitment. SMU - the NPC sororities were criticized in the press, and then someone actually did the research - AND IT TURNS OUT UP TO THAT POINT IN TIME NO BLACK WOMEN HAD GONE THROUGH RECRUITMENT. Several qualified women went through, and guess what? They were pledged. So yes, I can sit here and say that sometimes the problem is that black women are not going thorugh the NPC recruitment process.

And again - you don't understand NPC membership selection. You can't. I don't think I'm revealing too much to say that the reasons behind a member's vote remain as private as the member wishes. Race may, or may not, be a reason for A member to chose not to vote for a woman - but for you to become omniscient all of a sudden and say that it is racism for chapters to not have black members (I don't know of any NPCs that DON'T have minority members - I'm sure we would have heard of it were that the case) is to denigrate the NPC and the many intelligent, open-minded members who have pledged and initiated women from across the colour spectrum. Are there chapters that might not pledge a black woman? Probably - but to paint the whole system at a campus or even worse, the NPC ,as racist without some sort of data to back up your assertion is to ignore the reality of NPC chapters today AND discourages otherwise interested women from pursuing membership - then it becomes a vicious circle. Black women don't go through, black women don't pledge, chapters don't have black members, so black women don't go through.

[deepimpact2]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Again, you are basing all of this on your instincts or opinion - I will give you a concrete example of why I can sit here and say that sometimes there haven't been any qualified black women going through a NPC recruitment. SMU - the NPC sororities were criticized in the press, and then someone actually did the research - AND IT TURNS OUT UP TO THAT POINT IN TIME NO BLACK WOMEN HAD GONE THROUGH RECRUITMENT. Several qualified women went through, and guess what? They were pledged. So yes, I can sit here and say that sometimes the problem is that black women are not going thorugh the NPC recruitment process.

And again - you don't understand NPC membership selection. You can't. I don't think I'm revealing too much to say that the reasons behind a member's vote remain as private as the member wishes. Race may, or may not, be a reason for A member to chose not to vote for a woman - but for you to become omniscient all of a sudden and say that it is racism for chapters to not have black members (I don't know of any NPCs that DON'T have minority members - I'm sure we would have heard of it were that the case) is to denigrate the NPC and the many intelligent, open-minded members who have pledged and initiated women from across the colour spectrum. Are there chapters that might not pledge a black woman? Probably - but to paint the whole system at a campus or even worse, the NPC ,as racist without some sort of data to back up your assertion is to ignore the reality of NPC chapters today AND discourages otherwise interested women from pursuing membership - then it becomes a vicious circle. Black women don't go through, black women don't pledge, chapters don't have black members, so black women don't go through.

Thank you for validating what I was saying. I'm sure there are many NPC's that have MINORITY members. There are other minority groups of women out there. And I have seen many of them join NPC groups. But that's not the same as having BLACK women.

And for the record, I HAVE heard of white sororities not allowing black members or giving them hell through the process that amounts to racist and egregious behavior.

As for black women not going through the process in the first place...that's no excuse either. Many times they don't go through the process because things happen before they try to go through the process...not to mention the fact that these groups have a way of letting people know who is or is not welcome in the group.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by deepimpact2

And for the record, I HAVE heard of white sororities not allowing black members or giving them hell through the process that amounts to racist and egregious behavior.

Excuse me if I don't take this as proof that NPC chapters haze black women. You heard? Really.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by deepimpact2

And for the record, I HAVE heard of white sororities not allowing black members or giving them hell through the process that amounts to racist and egregious behavior.

As for black women not going through the process in the first place...that's no excuse either. Many times they don't go through the process because things happen before they try to go through the process...not to mention the fact that these groups have a way of letting people know who is or is not welcome in the group.

You sound paranoid. I have never "heard of" any of these things you claim. Perhaps they're fabricated?