Things you say instead of cursing

[Rain Man]

T*ts - breastesses (I use "nubbins" if they are small).

P***y - booty or puddin' (Technically the vagina is defined as the female "pudendum", so puddin' is an abbreviated term for such--look it up in the dictionary and see for yourself).

D**k - manhood or Wagstaff (Lemme explain; when I was a kid, my stepdad would make these strange meals and say to me "Eat it, makes your d**k big. Well, at the age of 6, the only d**k I knew was $20K Pyramid host Dick Clark, so I thought he was referring to Dick Clark. Well, Dick Clark's middle name is, you guessed it, Wagstaff).

A** - lately I have been using the word tail (or tayle, as I like to pronounce it).

Oh, before I forget, I gotta use the one-size-fits-all interjection specifically intended as an alternative to cussing, coined by stand-up comedian Alonzo Jones:

HAMBURGER!! (Or, as he would say, HAAAAAAAMBURGER!!)

[nikki1920]

I was waiting for someone to say HaaaaaaaamBURger. lol

My boyfriend says God Bless, for GD.
I say "curse word" for generic stuff, especially if kids are present.
Or I do the Looney Tunes thing, Ratkin-frackin-tarnation.... (picture Yosemite Sam falling down the hill). lol

CTFU for breasteses.

[DigitalAngel126]

Originally posted by nikki1920

My boyfriend says God Bless, for GD.

Was just about to post pretty much the same. Many of the nurses at work will, instead of saying "G*d damn her!!", bust out with "GOD BLESS HER!!! " Hahhaa. It sounds funny when said with malice.

[sageofages]

Originally posted by MMB-DST
Do y'all know i just figured out what CTFU means. Am i slow or what?

OK I am totally slow....what does CTFU mean?

[Prissfit1908]

CTFU = Cracking the f*ck up

I try to curtail the curse words, but I just end up incorporating silly stuff with the curse words... Ignant...

Ones that I'm known to say on a regular basis:

Cheese and Rice - I never say JC
What in thee...? with an emphasis on THEE - Instead of WTF or WTH

motherlover - instead of motherf***er

[preciousjeni]

Instead of Mother F***** my ex and I used to say (and I still say it):

Motha SCOOTA!!

[lostnfound117]

BULL SHUCKIE!!!!

[BabyBlue91]

I usually say "dang" for da*n and "blankety-blank" for everything else, especially f-bombs. (They really seem to fly on those "War of the Roses" radio segments!)

[Rain Man]

Originally posted by Prissfit1908
CTFU = Cracking the f*ck up

Instead of using that term I use CFAO, or more technically, CF&O.

WTF - I use What the Freak, What the Blank, or just plain, What tha'

[ykimber]

Kudur or vagetter or Puddy- Instead of P***y
Weeder- D**k
Nenners- Instead of breast
I guess being around children makes you come up with new terms for private areas!!!

[TonyB06]

I attended a panel event once where there were "director's chairs" placed on stage. One of the panelists was a sistah, who unfortunately for her, had worn a rather short skirt that day. The stage, as is the case in most auditoria, was elevated above the audience seating.

Anyway the sistah sat down and her skirt rode up a bit. About a row behind me, I heard one guy, apparently looking at her, say to another "Da*m, man, look. You can see clear up to Mother Africa!"

I was done.

[toocute]

Originally posted by TonyB06
Anyway the sistah sat down and her skirt rode up a bit. About a row behind me, I heard one guy, apparently looking at her, say to another "Da*m, man, look. You can see clear up to Mother Africa!"

I was done.

I would have been done also. LOL!!!!