Why Rejected from a Sorority?

[IrishLake]

Originally Posted by Libertylove

All I was looking for people to tell me is an idea of maybe why girls haven't gotten into your own sororities, input like that to help someone like me out.

We can't tell you this, as it membership selection, which is considered ritual and confidential to members only.

All we can say is we're sorry it didn't work out, and best of luck during spring informal! Get involved on your campus, makes friends with some sorority women, and hope for a better outcome in the future.

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by Libertylove

All I was looking for people to tell me is an idea of maybe why girls haven't gotten into your own sororities, input like that to help someone like me out. I wasn't looking for anything else so please cool it. I gave my feedback of how different things probably wouldn't be the case, example my high GPA just to get more information on what else it could be. Some of you are being very obnoxious about this, if this forum is annoying you so much I really don't know why you are still posting to my question and frankly, I don't really want you to be.

The reason GCers were being "obnoxious" is because you were the one acting that way first. You didn't seem to understand the first time someone said so that WE CAN'T TELL YOU WHY YOU DIDN'T GET A BID. We can tell you that things like GPA, extra-curriculars, and conversation skills could be factors, but beyond that, we're done.

But you just kept going on and on and on looking for a reason, and getting frustrated when no one would give you one...

Originally Posted by Libertylove

So I attended the first day, loved it, couldn't wait to go back. Second Day, I got a phone call saying I did not get an invitation back to any of the sororities. My question is simple, why?
......
I am really confused and I just want an honest answer of why people think I got rejected from ALL of them. I'm really hurt and I am taking it to heart. If someone could give me an answer I'd love to know. I just want a good honest answer.

Originally Posted by Libertylove

Well as much as I appreciate your apologies, that doesn't tell me anything and it leaves me just where I am. I have said it before, I want just an honest answer of why. If you feel more comfortable private messaging me that is understandable. I just want the truth.

Originally Posted by Libertylove

I wasn't asking it to be fixed now was I?

Perhaps you could understand that (or maybe you didn't read thoroughly) that I got rejected from all five sororities on the first day of rushing, so I am just looking for some constructive criticism. I of course already understand that

1) You wouldn't know what the sororities, this is obvious
2) Other sororities are not allowed to talk about why they would reject me.

I am not moping, I am just wondering about reasons someone would be rejected from a sorority especially in my case when I got rejected to all five in one day.

Can anyone give me an idea on that?

Originally Posted by Libertylove

From ALL five?

Let it go.

[ASTalumna06]

Aw, I was lucky enough to receive a private message from the OP! Here is how she started it:

You really should read something thoroughly before you start being so rude.

Seriously? I have a reading comprehension problem? You're the one who doesn't seem to understand anything that we're saying. And YOU were the one who called us obnoxious... I, in my quoted text below, only pointed out that YOU are the one who is being obnoxious by continuing to press everyone for more information that we simply don't have.

Originally Posted by ASTalumna06

The reason GCers were being "obnoxious" is because you were the one acting that way first. You didn't seem to understand the first time someone said so that WE CAN'T TELL YOU WHY YOU DIDN'T GET A BID. We can tell you that things like GPA, extra-curriculars, and conversation skills could be factors, but beyond that, we're done.

But you just kept going on and on and on looking for a reason, and getting frustrated when no one would give you one...

Let it go.

[KSUViolet06]

Another good thread to read:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...d.php?t=121568

It's aimed at parents of PNMs but it talks about the "who you know" component of recruitment a little. It's geared toward the more competitive schools but there is some truth to it for other schools as well.

[agzg]

You people are talking about recs like they're the be-all-end-all of recruitment.

There are schools that don't give a crap about recs. They exist. And they're not even freaking unicorns OR their slightly more common cousin, the warhol.

It seriously might not all be about recs. I don't think my chapter received a single rec when I was a collegian. I have to REMIND my peers to fill out Legacy Introduction Forms, because that's even close enough to a rec that people forget they exist.

The OP should talk to sorority members on her campus about how common recs are before going out and securing at least one, if not more than one (since we're harping on it so much) for each chapter that does informal recruitment. That would have scared the living shit out of a chapter like mine.

Like, if they know what a rec is, go ahead and get one. If they don't, don't even bother.

[Zillini]

Originally Posted by Libertylove

I'm a sophomore and I just transferred in.

Are you certain that your GPA from your previous school transferred and not just the credits? Recently there was a thread about another transfer story. That girl's GPA was reported to the sororities as 0.0 and all the chapters released her.

If you just transferred in this semester, nobody in the chapters knew you. Sophomores+ might routinely get bids on your campus, however it might be that they only bid girls who the chapter members have known through classes, clubs, etc.

[scrapcat]

As a mom whose daughter just finished rush, I can tell you this: my darling, perfect, intelligent, sweet, wonderful.. etc. child was cut heavily after round 1 and 2! Who knows why? Not me, not her. She got "fantastic" vibes from all the houses. It comes down to how well you react, chat, dress etc. Oh yes and grades! My daughter ended up in her "perfect" sorority. Yes she was lucky, but I also know that many girls at her school were not matched. It happens everywhere. I hope the future brings you good luck.

[Titchou]

I'm telling you that the shoes were a HUGE issue. They screamed "I don't care enough!" Did you see anyone else in sneakers? I certainly hope not. If you had said to each house: Pardon my sneakers but I have a recent foot injury and am not allowed to wear dress shoes yet" - that would have made a positive impression on the groups. But no, you didn't care enough and neither did they. Sorry. I you persist and go to law school, please don't ever show up in court in them The judge will blast you for it.

[Bamarox]

I have been an advisor on both small and large campuses, so I can look outside the so called "bama bubble." While a recommendation will not insure a bid,many times it will insure an invitation to the second round of parties. This poor kid did not make it past the open house round. All I said was that it might get her foot in the door a second time. You girls certainly get testy.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by Bamarox

I have been an advisor on both small and large campuses, so I can look outside the so called "bama bubble." While a recommendation will not insure a bid,many times it will insure an invitation to the second round of parties. This poor kid did not make it past the open house round. All I said was that it might get her foot in the door a second time. You girls certainly get testy.

But see, here's the thing, that's not necessarily true. Just because you've worked with "small" and "large" campuses, that's still not true. The OP would be well advised to ask sorority members on her campus whether or not they receive recs for PNMs.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Bamarox

I have been an advisor on both small and large campuses, so I can look outside the so called "bama bubble." While a recommendation will not insure a bid,many times it will insure an invitation to the second round of parties. This poor kid did not make it past the open house round. All I said was that it might get her foot in the door a second time. You girls certainly get testy.

Actually, I was testy-ing at the "most national sororities" part.

You have no idea what "most national sororities" do unless you've somehow gotten membership selection information that a nonmember shouldn't have.

Not to mention that saying "many schools" will release women without a rec is flat out untrue. "Many schools" (as I've said) wouldn't know what a rec looks like.

I don't think this PNM was released because of recs or lack of them, because I don't think (based on what she's told us) it's that kind of school. More than likely her grades did not transfer and she was shown as ineligible. (I'm sure sneakers with dress pants didn't help either.)

[Bamarox]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Actually, I was testy-ing at the "most national sororities" part.

You have no idea what "most national sororities" do unless you've somehow gotten membership selection information that a nonmember shouldn't have.

Not to mention that saying "many schools" will release women without a rec is flat out untrue. "Many schools" (as I've said) wouldn't know what a rec looks like.

I don't think this PNM was released because of recs or lack of them, because I don't think (based on what she's told us) it's that kind of school. More than likely her grades did not transfer and she was shown as ineligible. (I'm sure sneakers with dress pants didn't help either.)

OK You are right I don't know anything about other National Sororities. I just for the life of me can't figure out why Panhellenic Groups gather in the summer and collect PNM resumes to send RECOMMENDATIONS. I guess they don't have anything better to do. Even at schools where references are not the norm, what would it hurt? I never said she was released because she did not have a rec. I said THAT AT SOME SCHOOLS that can happen.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Bamarox

OK You are right I don't know anything about other National Sororities. I just for the life of me can't figure out why Panhellenic Groups gather in the summer and collect PNM resumes to send RECOMMENDATIONS.

Other than your group, you have no idea what the other 25 NPC groups do with those recommendations. Maybe they make paper hats out of them and dance around.

And again...many alumnae Panhellenic groups don't gather in the summer, collect PNM resumes, or do anything with recommendations.

[Bamarox]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Other than your group, you have no idea what the other 25 NPC groups do with those recommendations. Maybe they make paper hats out of them and dance around.

And again...many alumnae Panhellenic groups don't gather in the summer, collect PNM resumes, or do anything with recommendations.

Do you honestly think different groups don't talk. I have close friends in almost every NPC group, we all talk in the summer and write recs for each others friends. I never got the impression that after they volunteered to write a rec, that they were thrown in the garbage or that they were turned into paper hats.

[DubaiSis]

This girl is just as likely to be a 52 year old man as a girl who failed at rush. That's where the snarky is coming from.