Rush - What to NOT do or say - Page 37

Drolefille · #1 01-02-2011, 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

I lived with two women from another chapter my senior year, and absolutely we talked. Mostly it was about blatantly rude PNM's and things like that, though.

PNM's should react to the situation. If you are preffed by someone with whom you have built a relationship during recruitment (or knew before recruitment), and she says something like "I'd love to see you here on bid day", of course you can respond in kind.

If, OTOH, your rusher is saying things like "I hope you've enjoyed recruitment", than saying "this is my favorite house!!!" is going to be a little creepy.

Yeah it's not that we never talked at all, it's just that talking about Suzy PNM saying we were her favorite would never have occurred to us. What conversation did happen was more "LOL can you believe X" and "I'm so effing tired."

DeltaBetaBaby · #2 01-02-2011, 03:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drolefille

Yeah it's not that we never talked at all, it's just that talking about Suzy PNM saying we were her favorite would never have occurred to us. What conversation did happen was more "LOL can you believe X" and "I'm so effing tired."

Yes, but if you tell more than one chapter that they are your absolute favorite...well...that could get around.

SWTXBelle · #3 01-02-2011, 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Yes, but if you tell more than one chapter that they are your absolute favorite...well...that could get around.

Eh - it could well be that in the heat of the moment at pref that chapter WAS your absolute favorite. Many a mind has been changed during pref - heck, many a mind has been changed whilst the pnm stared at that preference ranking form.

Alumiyum · #4 01-02-2011, 03:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

Eh - it could well be that in the heat of the moment at pref that chapter WAS your absolute favorite. Many a mind has been changed during pref - heck, many a mind has been changed whilst the pnm stared at that preference ranking form.

After my first pref party I was 90% sure, truly, that I would list them first. I then went to the second and suicided for my organization. I've watched a ton of PNMs pull the exact same thing. That's why I personally caution against saying for certain Polly PNM only wants XYZ...because minds can change so easily. At least once she makes it to pref, saying XYZ is her favorite is very unlikely to effect her chances if she does change her mind right before she signs the card.

Drolefille · #5 01-02-2011, 04:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

It seems to me that everyone is assuming that the actives in a chapter will know both where the pnm ranked them, and where the chapter ranked her (Bid list #1 or #2). Is that often the case? In my experience, only a few actives and alumnae know how the chips fall . . . which is good. No new member should have a "Bid list #2" label pinned on her, nor should a chapter know if it was not the new member's first choice.

Yeah the average chapter member would probably be capable of knowing where the PNM is on their bid list, but they'd have to be doing it themselves during MS. That would be nearly impossible and highly unlikely. They wouldn't know where the PNM ranked them unless she told them and was honest about it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Yes, but if you tell more than one chapter that they are your absolute favorite...well...that could get around.

Yeah and that would probably happen early on, "we had a girl tell us we were her favorite after the first night!" "Really? We did too, and so did OPQ." "Wait was it So-and-so with the yellow dress?" "YES! OMG"
Actives have their own favorites and can probably figure out who any particular PNM is with effort, but off the top of their head there are probably very few PNMs being talked about in detail with other chapters, and many who they won't recall the names of until later rounds just due to shear numbers.

AnchorAlumna · #6 04-14-2011, 12:00 AM

Along the lines of cleaning up your Facebook profile and/or locking it up....I recently looked up a PNM and she had her page locked....not unusual. I do hate it though...she could have at least put up a flattering profile pic and left something - high school or something - so you can tell she's the "Jenn Johnson from Podunk High going to Big State U."

HOWEVER...searching her name on Google turned up where she posted on a page for people searching for dorm roommates at Big State. There is a list of questions that each person answers. Some of her answers were....ahem...interesting.
Example:

"Party or study? PARTAY.....HELLL YEAH!!!!!!

Not that big a deal....it was her other more explicit, even more illuminating answers that raised the eyebrows.
OTHO....go ahead and leave it up, girly....nobody will know!!
Right.

SWTXBelle · #7 01-02-2011, 03:51 PM

It seems to me that everyone is assuming that the actives in a chapter will know both where the pnm ranked them, and where the chapter ranked her (Bid list #1 or #2). Is that often the case? In my experience, only a few actives and alumnae know how the chips fall . . . which is good. No new member should have a "Bid list #2" label pinned on her, nor should a chapter know if it was not the new member's first choice.

thetaj · #8 04-14-2011, 12:25 AM

LOL @ "Podunk High"

I only use the word "podunk" to describe my mother's hometown in Alabama lol

msdiva26 · #9 05-11-2011, 04:57 PM

I too find this thread very helpful you ladies are very nice and this forum is very informative

deltasigmakkg · #10 05-19-2011, 12:58 AM

I would avoid talking about boys all together, one of my friends went through this year and on pref day (the last day of rush) she brought up her boyfriend in conversation (harmless, right?) but then the girl rushing her politely told her that he was actually dating the same guy..and had been for about a year. Needless to say, it was an awkward hour.

Low C Sharp · #11 05-19-2011, 11:27 AM

Yes, definitely awkward, but if I were the sorority woman in that situation, I'd be grateful to learn that I was dating a low-down dog. Obviously, the rushee was in the dark about his multiple girlfriends or she wouldn't have mentioned it.
________
Head shop

FSUZeta · #12 07-18-2011, 04:09 PM

^we really need a "like" button.^

spacegirl · #13 07-28-2011, 01:29 AM

Hello GC! So like many others I have been reading all different threads on this site from a distance. But since recruitment is less than a month away, I thought now would be a good time to ask my question.

So I am going to be a sophomore at a competitive school in the south. They do have a sophomore quota that was implemented (just a background note!). I am going to be living with my boyfriend next year. We are good kids, don't drink, etc. But when people hear "living with boyfriend", I usually get skeptical glances from people. So my question is, should I mention that I am going to be living with him? I know rushers will probably ask where I am living, and I could avoid talking about my roommate, but would that be ideal? Thank you in advance!

Always AlphaGam · #14 07-28-2011, 01:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spacegirl

Hello GC! So like many others I have been reading all different threads on this site from a distance. But since recruitment is less than a month away, I thought now would be a good time to ask my question.

So I am going to be a sophomore at a competitive school in the south. They do have a sophomore quota that was implemented (just a background note!). I am going to be living with my boyfriend next year. We are good kids, don't drink, etc. But when people hear "living with boyfriend", I usually get skeptical glances from people. So my question is, should I mention that I am going to be living with him? I know rushers will probably ask where I am living, and I could avoid talking about my roommate, but would that be ideal? Thank you in advance!

It's not necessary to mention your boyfriend.

If asked where you live, casually mention that you live off campus. If they ask if you live with someone, say you live with a roommate.

KSUViolet06 · #15 07-28-2011, 01:35 AM

^^^I wouldn't go out of my way to tell people.

I will say that people may look at that unfavorably, but not in an "omg I'm so conservative and living together is so wrong" kind of way.

At times, when you find out that a PNM is living with a guy, the assumption is made that the PNM will be stuck up her BF's behind all the time, not make time for events because "I haven't seen my boyyyyfriend in 3 days!!" and not be as involved because BF is the priority. So why waste a spot on her when we could have a FRESHMAN with no live-in who is more likely to be around?